Calling Mrs. Elvis... is anybody home? - 04/30/09 09:18 AM
Susan Mangigian wrote a lovely post, this morning called Thankful Thursday, outlining the need to stop and think about those things, and those people, for whom we're grateful.
It was a nice post, that reminds us to stop and count our blessings.  Think about those things you're grateful to have in your life, those people who you take for granted each and every day.
Hmmmm.... taken for granted....who does that remind me of....?
My wife, Amy, (Mrs. Elvis), is not a complaining type of woman.  My wife, in fact, is the picture of happiness.  She goes about her busy day without … (21 comments)

if you'll pay me a bonus, I'll wrangle my buyer into buying yours, instead of the other one.... right? - 04/29/09 10:27 PM
Charles Stallion wrote an interesting post about a transaction that was going to arbitration, due to a buyer's agent bonus that had been rescinded.  That very interesting post, prompted J. Phillip Faranda to write a post about Bait & Switching those very same buyer agent bonuses.  Also a very good read.
Those two excellent reads have prompted me, this morning, to touch on the subject of Buyer's Agent bonuses.
I've had many instances where another agent, or a seller will ask me my opinion about offering a Buyer's Agent bonus.  Their logic suggests that if the bonus is large enough, that … (71 comments)

that's not funny! - 04/29/09 01:42 PM
Another in my series intended to bring humour to the active rain community.
Jokes that are, above all, clean (just in case you want to relate them to a client)
Easy to remember, (recognizing that our Realtor demographic is aging... just a tiny bit... and memory is the second thing to go... I don't remember what the first thing is).
And they need to be funny... so many of the jokes we hear are NOT funny..
Here we go:
 
A woman gives birth to identical twins, and gives them up for adoption. One of them goes to a family in … (17 comments)

ooops... I missed one. - 04/28/09 03:14 PM
I know everyone seemed a bit bereft, when I ran out of cool military photos, from my NASA source...
well, among all the photos, I found one that I inadvertently didn't publish on my blog.  It's another great image, so you should enjoy it.
I haven't heard anything from my contact... so I don't know when / if I'll be seeing any more... but in the meantime enjoy this image, and I'll try to keep you otherwise entertained.
… (12 comments)

Crum & the Saratoga Chip - 04/28/09 11:18 AM
Potatoes.  You either love them or you hate them.
Americans, in general, love them in all their forms.  Pototoes, as a world food, are second in human consumption, only to rice.  And as thin, delicate, salted crisps... they are the United State's favourite snack food.
Potato chips originated in the summer of 1853.  An American Indian named George Crum was the chef at an elegant restaurant (Moon Lake Lodge) in a resort at Saratoga Springs, New York.  On their menu, then included French-fried potatoes.  These were thick cut potatoes, deep-fried, in the style that Thomas Jefferson (who'd been ambassador to France … (21 comments)

Samuel B. Morse - 04/27/09 03:12 PM
Today is Samuel F.B. Morse's birthday.  He was born April 27th, 1791.
That may not mean much to most, but Samuel Morse was the inventor of the Morse Code.   Still doesn't mean much.  Let's put it in contemporary meaning.  Samuel Morse was the inventor of, what at the time was, TEXTING.
As a boy scout, we were all taught Morse code (among others), and we could all signal an S.O.S. using Morse Code (dot-dot-dot.... dash-dash-dash... dot.dot.dot).
Morse code, was one of the first methods of communicating at a distance electronically.  It was the first major step above letter-writing, and smoke signals.  … (14 comments)

... it's not the dress, honey. - 04/27/09 12:42 PM
Another in my series intended to bring humour to the active rain community.
Jokes that are, above all, clean (just in case you want to relate them to a client)
Easy to remember, (recognizing that our Realtor demographic is aging... just a tiny bit... and memory is the second thing to go... I don't remember what the first thing is).
And they need to be funny... so many of the jokes we hear are NOT funny..
Here we go
My wife asked me: "Does this dress make my butt look big"?
 
I answered: "Not as much as the dress you … (11 comments)

are we human, or are we firemen? - 04/27/09 09:02 AM
One of my daughter's favourite songs, today "Are we human or are we dancer?"
So this post asks the question... are we firemen??  Do you have a plan... or are you just spending your day, running from crisis to crisis putting out fires?
Each transaction should have a plan, we should know the good the bad and the ugly about each transaction as we enter it. 
Is the financing questionable? I need to stay in tight touch with the lender. Is the appraisal going to be tight?  Gather your comps and make sure you provide them to the appraiser. Does the … (12 comments)

don't be a secret agent. - 04/26/09 10:42 AM
it's raining, it's pouringthe old man is snoring,bumped his headwhen he went to bedand couldn't get up in the morning.
It's pouring here in greater Chicagoland.  And, of course, today was the day that we had scheduled with a Window-washing company to send their guys out and wash the windows.  So 10:00 arrives, and Andy arrives in the rain, with his truck and ladder.
Standing at the front door, soaked to the bone, Andy asks "are you sure you want to do this today?"
"No", we answered "in fact we called the office yesterday to suggest if it was still raining, … (12 comments)

Rumour Detectives - 04/25/09 09:52 AM
As this is a blogging site, it's fairly common to see people posting things that have been sent to them via e-mail and the internet.  Having come to the internet and the computer as an adult, I always presume that everyone else is waaaay ahead of me, and that I don't know anything new or exciting or more than they might.
I recently suggested to a poster, that they might check out what they posted (which they had received through an e-mail from a friend), because I knew that it was incorrect.  I suggested they check it out at the popular … (10 comments)

The New Colossus - 04/24/09 03:33 PM
Not like the brazen giant of Greek fame,With conquering limbs astride from land to land;Here at our sea-washed, sunset gates shall standA mighty woman with a torch, whose flameis the imprisoned lightning, and her nameMother of Exiles.  From her beacon-handGlows world-wide welcome; her mild eyes commandThe air-bridged harbor that twin cities frame"Keep, ancient lands, your storied pomp!" cries sheWith silent lips. "Give me your tired, your poor,Your huddled masses yearning to breath free,The wretched refuse of your teeming shoreSend these, the homeless, tempest-tossed to me,I lift my lamp beside the golden door!"- Emma Lazarus, 1883
She is made of a sheeting … (18 comments)

Dear Mr. Realtor Knowledgey III - 04/24/09 10:48 AM

Dear Mr. Realtor KnowledgeyWhat's all this brou haha that I hear about "duel agency"?
Dear Spelling Bee WinnerFirst let's define Duel Agency.  A duel agent can be one of two things.     1) It could be the person who sets up the duel, and runs the rules between two combatants at twenty paces.  For example the individual who set up the duel between Aaron Burr and Alexander Hamilton. (not a high point in Alexander Hamilton's career)
or
    2) It could be a DUAL agent (spelled correctly this time) such as Benedict Arnold (who worked for the embattled colonies as … (28 comments)

c'mon... this photo just cain't be real... can it? - 04/23/09 10:40 AM
Okay, this is the last photo, in my series of photos that were sent to me by my NASA connection.
Clearly, it doesn't have much to do with NASA, but seems to be a flyover at a Texas Aggies game.  In fairness, even though I got this through my NASA guy, I have seen this image online elsewhere, and some have questioned it's authenticity.  I'm not in a position to comment on it's authenticity, other than to comment that the image is waaaaaaaaaay cool.
Enjoy.

… (22 comments)

Oh... but ...i thought it was vacant! - 04/22/09 02:41 PM
For those of you who've followed the conversation going on at Oh, Hi, here is the the end to the sad, sad story.
I left a message on the agent's cell phone voicemail since she didn't pick up at any of her numbers.  Apparently I played up the "guilt" in my message just right, because she didn't even feel comfortable returning my call, rather she sent me an e-mail.
"I got your message. I'm very sorry, we were at the complex seeing the other unit that's for sale.  My colleague had shown her listing on Friday and I thought it was … (18 comments)

if it's Wednesday, is must be Wartime stuff - 04/22/09 12:37 PM
... and coming to the last of my photos from my NASA connection.  The images are clear, and unique... the type of images that the average "schmo" doesn't have access to.  I found them compelling enough to share them with you.  I know you're enjoying them... so here are a some more.
My colleague has a friend who works at NASA, and somehow he has access to all of these photos.  They are remarkable, as you can see, and I sure hope that he had permission to publish them.
I only have one more photo left.. after these... that's right... only … (5 comments)

rustle, rustle... click, click... Oh Hi! I didn't know anyone was here!! - 04/21/09 10:14 PM
... that's how my seller was greeted today, as she sat in her living room.  Nobody knocked... the key just turned, and the front door opened.
And in walked a Realtor with her client.  As my seller's jaw dropped to the floor, the Realtor stood surprised to find anyone at home... the Realtor quickly recovered and said
"Oh,... I didn't know anyone was here...!!  I was showing the unit across the courtyard, and since I knew the combination code to the lock box, I just let myself in... do you mind if we look around?"
My seller was too stunned to … (88 comments)

... and two if by sea... - 04/21/09 10:21 AM
And, yet more photos from my NASA connection.  The images are clear, and unique... the type of images that the average "schmo" doesn't have access to.  I found them compelling enough to share them with you.  I know you're enjoying them... so here are a some more.
My colleague has a friend who works at NASA, and somehow he has access to all of these photos.  They are remarkable, as you can see, and I sure hope that he had permission to publish them.

… (7 comments)

with only an 8th grade education... - 04/21/09 10:16 AM
Do you remember when your parents, or grandparents told you that they had only an 8th grade education?  That might be more of a statement than you think.  Here is a copy of the 8th grade final exam, from Salinas, Kansas in the year 1895. I would have needed to repeat 8th grade, because I would have failed.
And no, I do not have the answers to these questions.  So don't ask. Could YOU have passed into 9th grade?
GRAMMAR (one hour allotted)
1.   Give nine rules for the use of capital letters2.   Name the parts of speech and define those … (18 comments)

More Military Monday - 04/20/09 10:22 AM
And, yet more photos from my NASA connection.  The images are clear, and unique... the type of images that the average "schmo" doesn't have access to.  I found them compelling enough to share them with you.  I know you're enjoying them... so here are a some more.
My colleague has a friend who works at NASA, and somehow he has access to all of these photos.  They are remarkable, as you can see, and I sure hope that he had permission to publish them.

… (13 comments)

Erectile Dysfunction of the Transaction - 04/20/09 08:10 AM
It's not you... it's me.  I'm sorry. It's stress... I really want to... no, no... there's nothing wrong with you... you're beautiful... really! 
Yes, I truly desire you... In fact there's nothing I want more, than to live inside of you... but alas... no amount of "massaging" this loan is going to help. Our debt-to-loan ratio is out of whack.  And our lender says that even if they approve the loan (which they have), there's no guarantee that PMI will sign on... so we're left feeling impotent.  We just can't get it up any higher than that.
We just can't get … (17 comments)

Illinois Holocaust Museum in Skokie opens today - 04/19/09 01:51 PM
Today was the opening of the Illinois Holocaust Museum, and even though it's been raining pretty steadily on and off all day, they are anticipating a crown in attendance of approximately 10,000 people for the opening
The Illinois Holocaust Museum was built at a cost of approximately $45 million, and former President Bill Clinton and Nobel Peace Prize winner and Holocaust survivor Elie Wiesel are featured speakers for the opening.
The opening has been sold out, and tents are set up in an adjacent field, with Disneyworld-style waiting lines to get into the museum.  Many of the exhibits were created using … (14 comments)

Soldier's Sunday - 04/19/09 01:02 PM
And, yet more photos from my NASA connection.  The images are clear, and unique... the type of images that the average "schmo" doesn't have access to.  I found them compelling enough to share them with you.  I know you're enjoying them... so here are a some more.
My colleague has a friend who works at NASA, and somehow he has access to all of these photos.  They are remarkable, as you can see, and I sure hope that he had permission to publish them.
I love this first one... look at the sonic blasts that are visible in the water... you … (12 comments)

okay, I know times are tough, and all... but sheeeeesh! - 04/18/09 04:32 PM
Okay, some of you may remember my slosh, slosh post, where I complained that I'd made an appointment to view a home... slogged all the way up to the front door, only to find the combo lock box frozen and we couldn't access the house.
I complained about the snow... the fact that the agent had clearly not been to the house for weeks (based on the footprints in the snow), and hadn't shovelled the walk to (or arranged to have it shovelled) to make the home accessible.
Well, since then... the home has reduced their price several times... and now … (12 comments)

Service Saturday - 04/18/09 11:14 AM
and more photos from my NASA connection.  The images are clear, and unique... the type of images that the average "schmo" doesn't have access to.  I found them compelling enough to share them with you.  I know you're enjoying them... so here are a some more.
My colleague has a friend who works at NASA, and somehow he has access to all of these photos.  They are remarkable, as you can see, and I sure hope that he had permission to publish them.

… (17 comments)

Earth Day is April 22, 2009 - 04/17/09 11:55 AM
Earth Day is Wednesday of next week.  I wanted to publish this prior to Earth Day, so that you'd have ample time to digest the information.  Earth Day is a great idea, one day a year, to think about the impact that the human race is having on the planet, and hopefully pull us back from the brink of disaster. It's a great time to celebrate our planet and discuss serious environmental concerns. It's also a time to pause and remember that, during the first Earth Day in 1970, some of the world's leading (and loudest) environmentalists were terrifying the public … (23 comments)

Fighting Friday - 04/17/09 09:27 AM
and more photos from my NASA connection.  The images are clear, and unique... the type of images that the average "schmo" doesn't have access to.  I found them compelling enough to share them with you.  I know you're enjoying them... so here are a some more.
My colleague has a friend who works at NASA, and somehow he has access to all of these photos.  They are remarkable, as you can see, and I sure hope that he had permission to publish them.

… (9 comments)

Thursday in the Theatre of War - 04/16/09 10:09 AM
... I haven't even come close to running out of these, so I want to continue sharing them.  These are more photos of the military from my colleague with the NASA connection.
... I still don't know the names and numerical markings for any of the equipment, so I'm open to any help you might have to offer.  But the photos are just so good, so unique, I can't help myself from posting them.
... Enjoy!

… (12 comments)

PLOrk - 04/16/09 08:51 AM
Seven geeky guys leaning in closely over their laptops, studying the glow of their LCD screens might not seem to be an unusual occurance and any local coffee shop these days. But in this case, we're talking about Musicians, and they're practicing onstage at the Newberry Library in downtown Chicago for their performance Thursday at 6:30 p.m. Seating is first-come, first-served, with a 5:30 reception preceding the concert.
They call themselves "laptopists" and they're a brave new world muscian who make their Apple PowerBooks create soaring sounds and knee-slapping rhythms by typing alt-shift-control type commands into their laptops. They're not texting, … (9 comments)

George Harrison receives a star on the Hollywood Walk of Fame. - 04/15/09 11:56 AM

Harrison, who was 58 when he died of cancer in 2001, becomes the second Beatle with a Hollywood star. John Lennon was the first.
The fact that George Harrison received a star is not a surprise.  The surprise comes in that George is only the second Beatle to receive one.  So... John has one (no big surprise)... George now has one (no big surprise)... Paul doesn't?? (big surprise!).  What up with that?  George's biggest collaborator on music and lyrics????  The left-handed bassist??? The cute one???  He doesn't warrant a star?
George's new star is located next to the iconic Hollywood … (19 comments)

Weapons of War Wednesday - 04/15/09 11:05 AM
... and we continue to show you more weapons of war, from my friend with the military connection.  I don't know any of the details on the photos that I'm displaying, so if you have any information about them, feel free to share.
... I'm displaying them rather large, so that any of the interesting detail will be totally visible.  Enjoy

… (4 comments)

Donald Duck and his polystyrene foam balls. - 04/15/09 08:04 AM
Danish engineer Karl Krøyer, in 1966, tried to copyright a method for raising ships off the ocean floor by filling them with polystyrene foam balls. When Krøyer tried to license his invention with the Dutch patent office, he was denied. Donald Duck had already done it.
Donald Duck?   Really, the guy who never wore pants?
Krøyer’s idea could actually be traced back to a Donald Duck comic written and drawn by Carl Barks. Barks was known for his scientific prowess as well as his ability to draw a decent pantless duck. In a 1944 story, when Donald got a bump on … (6 comments)

actual classified ads - 04/14/09 01:13 PM
gleaned from local papers:
 
FREE YORKSHIRE TERRIER. 8 years old. Hateful little bastard.  Bites! FREE PUPPIES 1/2 Cocker Spaniel, 1/2 sneaky neighbor's dog. FREE PUPPIES. Mother, A Kennel Club registered German Shepherd. Father, Super Dog. Able to leap tall fences in a single bound. FOUND DIRTY WHITE DOG. Looks like a rat. Been out a while. Better be a big reward. COWS, CALVES: NEVER BRED. Also 1 gay bull for sale. JOINING NUDIST COLONY! Must sell washer and dryer $100. WEDDING DRESS FOR SALE. Worn once by mistake.  Call Stephanie. FOR SALE BY OWNER. Complete set of Encyclopedia Britannica, 45 … (15 comments)

Tuesday's Troops - 04/14/09 10:38 AM
a continuation of the images that have been so well received.  These were supplied to me by a colleague, who has a friend who works at NASA.  I don't know how he came by these photos (I hope legally), but I have permission to post them.  They are exciting and unique, and I hope that you're enjoying them.
As usual, I don't know what we're viewing here (as the photos didn't come with captions) so if you know what we're viewing here, feel free to chime in.

… (8 comments)

Spiderman inspires the electronic ankle bracelet - 04/14/09 08:06 AM
In a 1977 issue of the comic book Spiderman, Peter Parker has the tables turned on him. Supervillain, Kingpin, tracks down Spidey using an electronic transmitter that he’d fastened to the superhero’s wrist. Although Kingpin eventually loses, in the last pages of the comic, a New Mexico judge saw simplicity in the plotline.
Inspired by Spidey, Judge Jack Love turned to a computer salesman and asked if he thought he could create a similar device to keep track of crime suspects awaiting trial.
The salesman managed to produce his first batch of electronic monitors 1n 1983. The city of Albuquerque tested … (9 comments)

Gently, gently we begin to peer over the ridge... - 04/13/09 04:22 PM
Over the last few weeks, I've begun to see an increase in business.
More buyers out looking... more offers being made... more contract being accepted.
Our office had an increase of 220% in accepted contracts last week (week over week).  And this past week was Spring Break in our area... so it gives me renewed hope that the market is starting to rebound.  I don't know if we've seen the bottom yet, or if we're bouncing (hard) against a sharp rocky bottom.  But buyers are beginning to reconize the value that's out there.
Woo (and also) Hoo!
… (11 comments)

Monday's More Military Montage - 04/13/09 10:36 AM
here are some more of the military photos that have been bestowed upon me, by my friend who has a friend @ NASA.  I don't know to whom I can attribute the photos (other than to say that I have permission to post them)... but they are way cool, and worthwhile viewing.

… (14 comments)

Popeye was woikin' for the government! Ack, ack, ack! - 04/12/09 05:22 PM
Everyone knows Popeye’s secret. Whenever the cartoon sailor is on the verge of losing a fight, he animatedly squeezes open a can of spinach (Ack, ack, ack, ack!), pours the greens down his throat (or ocassionally sucks them through his pipe), and uses his supercharged "Musk-els" to pummel his enemies. But fewer people know that the U.S. government is directly responsible for his dependence on canned vegetables.
In the 1930s, America was suffering through the Great Depression, and the government was desperately looking for ways to promote iron-rich spinach as a meat substitute. To help spread the word, they hired one … (26 comments)

Service Sunday - 04/12/09 11:30 AM
This is beginning a series of military photos that were supplied to me by the same colleague who sent us the NASA photos.  In their own way, they are just as fascinating, as these are the type of photos that we, as the lay public, rarely get to see.  I'm not enough of a military weapons afficianado to even tell you what we're looking at in some of the cases... but the photos are cool, and speak for themselves.
If someone would like to chime in and tell us what we're looking at (as far as the equipment, and exactly what's … (13 comments)

Captain Marvel, Elvis and the curly tuft of hair! - 04/10/09 09:06 AM
Elvis Presley fantasized about growing up to be like his favorite comic book superheroes, just like most American kids. But it turns out that The King might have been more interested in their fashion statements than their special powers.
As a teen, Elvis became engrossed with Captain Marvel Jr., known as “America’s most famous boy hero.” A younger version of Captain Marvel, the character sported an unusual hairstyle that featured a curly tuft of hair falling over the side of his forehead.  Sound familiar?
When Elvis set out to conquer America with his music, he copied the hairdo, thus making it … (8 comments)

Superman and the KKK - 04/09/09 11:54 AM
In the 1940s, Superman and his adventures were only a radio sensation. Children country-wide huddled around radios as the Man of Steel leapt off the page and over the airwaves.
Superman had been fighting crime in the funnies since 1938, but weekly radio episodes fleshed out his storyline even further. It was on the radio that Superman first faced Kryptonite, first met Jimmy Olsen, and became associated with the phrase “truth, justice, and the American way”. So when a young writer and activist named Stetson Kennedy decided to expose the secrets of the Ku Klux Klan, he looked to Superman for … (22 comments)

Little Canadian House for Sale! - 04/09/09 10:13 AM
Little House for Sale! This is believed to be the smallest house in Toronto, Ontario, Canada. Located at the Intersection of Dufferin St. and Rogers Rd., this house occupies what was at one time, planned to be a driveway.
It's a one bedroom, one bathroom home, that sits on a lot only 7.25 feet wide by 113.67 feet long.  The interior of the home is just under 300 square feet.
According to the listing, the home has been completely redone top-to-bottom and front-to-back.  It boasts a tumbled stone entrance walk, a renovated bathroom (not pictured) and renovated kitchen (which includes a … (14 comments)

Famous Poems, if they were rewritten as Limericks. - 04/08/09 02:47 PM
Stopping by the Woods on a Snowy Evening There once was a horse-riding chap Who took a trip in a cold snap He stopped in the snow But he soon had to go: He was miles away from a nap.
 
The Raven There once was a girl named Lenore And a bird and a bust and a door And a guy with depression And a whole lot of questions And the bird always says "Nevermore."
 
Do Not Go Gentle Into That Good Night There was an old father of Dylan Who was seriously, mortally illin' "I want," Dylan said … (15 comments)

... a dyslexic man walks into a bra... - 04/08/09 02:20 PM
Another in my series intended to bring humour to the active rain community.
Jokes that are, above all, clean (just in case you want to relate them to a client)
Easy to remember, (recognizing that our Realtor demographic is aging... just a tiny bit... and memory is the second thing to go... I don't remember what the first thing is).
And they need to be funny... so many of the jokes we hear are NOT funny..
This installation I've included a bunch of them, because they were too short to warrant a post of their own, and too funny to be … (18 comments)

the Hand of God - 04/06/09 09:07 PM

No, this isn't a post about Bob Stewart or any of the Active Rain Gods... this may be about the real one.
As per Yahoo News, there are these small dying pulsars that spin like crazy and light up their surroundings, often with ghostly glows. And that's what PSR B1509-58, which long ago collapsed into a sphere just 12 miles in diameter after running out of fuel, has done.
And what a strange scene this one has created.
In a new image from NASA's Chandra X-ray Observatory, it has  recorded an image that reveals a structure resembling a hand reaching … (20 comments)

Spellcheck wouldn't have helped on these. - 04/06/09 02:49 PM
Someone forwarded this to me recently... and I found it funny enough to pass along. Purportedly these are all true newspaper headlings that somehow made it past the editor's red pen.  Perhaps in the wee hours of the morning, just before deadline. MAN KILLS SELF BEFORE SHOOTING WIFE & DAUGHTER Er, I don't think so._____________________________________
SOMETHING WENT WRONG IN JET CRASH, EXPERTS SAYWow, those are really good experts! _____________________________________
POLICE BEGIN CAMPAIGN TO RUN DOWN JAYWALKERSIsn't that a touch extreme?_____________________________________ PANDA MATING FAILS: VETERINARIAN TAKES OVER Now that's conviction to your job _____________________________________ MINERS REFUSE TO WORK AFTER DEATH Damn, no-good-for-nothing' … (25 comments)

ooohh, that's some fine .. @#$% - 04/06/09 01:31 PM
Ohhh... that's about as fine an image of feminine pulchritude as I've seen in a long time.
But it begs the question:  From whence does this delicate morsel hail.  In otherwords where does she live?
from America?
from Sweden?
from Brazil?
from Denmark?
from Haiti?
from Trinidad?
how about Mexico?
somewhere else?
see if you can guess, and I'll post the answer later.  I assure you, you'll be surprised!
… (18 comments)

Hippo Birdie Two Ewes - 04/06/09 08:30 AM

Happy Birthday.
Happy Birthday.
There's pollution in the air,
people dying everywhere.
Happy Birthday.
Happy Birthday.
 
To quote my father-in-law
(a wise, wise man)
every day above ground
is a good day.
 
Keep your nose to the grindstone
but don't forget to look up ocassionally
and take in the beauty that surrounds you.
 
It ain't there forever
and neither are you.
 
Happy Birthday.
… (13 comments)

Two-and-a-half wives and a funeral... red balloons anyone? - 04/04/09 01:16 PM
So recently, a friend (really more of an acquantaince) of mine, Bill, died.  He was a very good friend, of a very good friend of mine, and we were kept up to date on his somewhat eclectic life.  We weren't close friends, and I didn't know him well... but I felt as though I did, through Osmosis.
My wife and I knew Bill and his 1st wife.  He then divorced and remarried #2 a wife from South America, and then tried for the Trifecta...the last "half wife"... a woman he dated and lived with for 7 years, yet never got around … (25 comments)

sorry.... you are not my client, I cannot share the inspection report/results with you. - 04/03/09 12:59 PM
Many years ago, when I was still a freshman Realtor, I attended the inspection of a home with my buyers.
The inspector wasn't too excited about ME (the Realtor, who'd recommended him) following along with the inspection, but my clients said, they wanted me to be there, so he relented. The inspection went fairly well, but there were a few minor/major issues that we needed to discuss.  At the completion of the inspection, after my clients had already left, I approached the inspector who was gathering up his equipment, and asked if he'd send me a copy of the inspection report.
… (16 comments)

they tried to kill us, they were unsuccessful... whoo hooo... let's eat! - 04/03/09 10:17 AM
Passover
It kinda sounds like a little pastry, that you opted not to eat.  Or maybe it's a bridge over the highway.  Nope, you're both wrong.  It's a Jewish Holiday.
"Okay, I've always been confused about this holiday.  What exactly is Passover, if you don't mind my asking?"
Not at all, in fact I'm glad you asked.  Passover, is like most Jewish Holidays... it celebrates a difficult time in Jewish history... ie: They tried to kill us... they didn't succeed... whoo boy, let's eat!
Okay, while that was funny (it was too!), it's not quite accurate.  Here's the basic story.  Passover, … (13 comments)

Dear Mr. Realtor Knowledgey II - 04/03/09 08:32 AM

There are some who asked whether an image in our last column, included a photo of Mr. Realtor Knowledgey's brain.  Unfortunately Mr. Realtor Knowledgey's Brain is far too large to fit in a standard photograph.  So I've included this photography of my awesome intellect, so that you can see why my brain doesn't fit in the frame.
Dear Mr. Realtor KnowledgeyWhat percentage should I expect to sell my house for?  96%, 94%, 90%?
Dear Bean CounterYou should expect to end up with exactly 50% of the monies that are left over, after your Realtor, Attorney, Loan Officer and Title company … (15 comments)

Dear Mr. Realtor-knowledgey... What up with that? - 04/02/09 01:13 PM
Dear Mr. Realtor-knowledgeyMy home has been on the market for two weeks now... no showings?  What up with that?
Dear Overpriced.D'uh!
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Dear Mr. Realtor-knowledgeyI've heard that commissions are negotiable, but nobody will take my overpriced listing with a 30 day exclusive marketing agreement at a reduced rate.  What up with that?
Dear Braindead.Ain't nobody gonna give you a discounted listing with a 30 day agreement, in a market where the average market time is about 120-180 days.
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Dear Mr. Realtor-knowledgeyHow did you get to be so smert?  What up with that?
Dear spelling champion:Many years of experience, lots of … (21 comments)

can someone turn up the volume on that amp?... I'm not getting any feedback! - 04/01/09 08:05 AM
" Hi, this is Alan May... I'm calling because you showed my listing at 1234 Sherman Avenue yesterday, and I'm wondering if you have any feedback you can share with me. "

Hey folks, I don't make those calls to annoy you.  I don't make those calls for my health. I make those calls because I'm truly interested in the feedback of your potential buyer, and I'm also interested in the buyer's agent's opinion as well.  You're not going to hurt my feelings... it's not my personal property, and any feedback you give me is going to help me convince … (11 comments)

 
Alan May, Coldwell Banker Realtor® Evanston, Illinois & Northern Suburbs (847.425.3779 almay@aol.com) Ambassador_large

Alan May, Coldwell Banker Realtor® Evanston, Illinois & Northern Suburbs

Evanston, IL

More about me…

847.425.3779 almay@aol.com

Address: Attn: Alan May, Realtor®, 2929 Central Street, Evanston, IL, 60201

Office Phone: (847) 425-3779

Cell Phone: (847) 924-3313

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