Meme Book Quick

I've been Meme'd by Dena Stevens!  Wow it's been a quite a while since I did one but this one looks fun and easy so I don't mind passing it along!   The rules are:

1. Grab the nearest book you lay your hands on*

2. Don't dig for your favorite book, the cool book or the intellectual one; just pick the closest!

3. Open the book to page 56

4. Find the fifth sentence

5. Post the text of the next four to five sentences

6. Tag up to 5 people to do the same

*The Bible doesn't count!

The first book I came across was sitting on my stairs on the way down this morning.

The Life and Times of the Thunderbolt Kid - Bill Bryson

Page 56 sentance 5:

"Each morning you would jump out of bed to find that the laces had somehow become four feet longer on one side of the shoe than the other.
Quite how sneakers did this just by being left on the floor overnight was a question that could not be answered - it was one of those things, like nuns and bad weather, that life threw at you periodically - but it took endless reserves of patience and scientific judgement to ge them right, for no mattter how painstakingly you shunted, the more unequal they generally became.
When by some miracle you finallly got them exactly right, the secondd lace would always snap, leaving you to sigh and start again.
The makers of sneakers also thoughtfullly pocked the soles with numberless crevices, craters, chevrons, mazes, crop circles and other rubbery hieroglyphs, so that when you stepped in a moist pile of dog sh*t, as you most assuredly did within three bounds of leaving the house, they provided additional absorbing hours of pastime while you cleaned them out with a stick, gagging quietly, but oddly content.
Hours more of weekend time needed to be devoted to picking burrs off socks, taking corks out of bottle caps, peeling frozen wrappers off popsicles, prising apart Oreo cookies without breaking either chocolate disc half or disturbing the integrity of the filling, and carefully picking labels off jars and bottles for absolutely no reason."

I was thinking it would be fun to take the text from the books you send my way and try to blend the sentences in a humorous way!!!!  So let's see what we come up with!  Here are my partners in crime:

Sarah Cooper (This is your group so I'm calling you out! This one's quick I promise; you'll still have plenty of time to twitter away ;)

Jeff Turner (Sorry Jeff, know how much you LOVE (not) meme's, but this one's different. Come on!  I'm counting on you to provide some interesting content)

Maureen Francis (Got time for quick fun meme?  I'd love to know what you're reading :)

Val Allocco (hey there girl! Stop over to AR for a quick meme if you have time!)