First of all, let me make something very clear right up front.  I generally like our local Bank of America office.  I like a young loan officer there named Luke Thomas and even used him for my last home purchase.  I recommend him to others and think that he does a great job.  Saying all of that, I also think that Bank of American in lots of ways are complete idiots!  And here's why.

We recently had a nice, waterfront home go under contract.  We recommended the aforementioned Luke Thomas to the buyer.  The buyer went to the main bank office here (where Luke is located) and dutifully asked for Luke.  Luke wasn't in.  The customer service rep named Julio then proceeded to "help" our buyer by taking the application.  And here's where things get ugly!  Apparently, BOA (Bank of America) encourages their non-loan personnel to pretend to be loan originators.  Often time, they have no training (yes, I know they get minimal training) in what questions to ask and how to proceed.  In this case, even though the buyer was well qualified, Julio neglected to ask the right questions to get this loan on track.  However, we were told over a month ago (this was a fairly long term closing) that BOA was ready to close whenever we were.  Well, the buyer and seller did decide to move the closing up and an addendum was prepared and given to the bank.  And that's when we found out how bad things really were.  The buyers have repeatedly turned in every item the bank has asked for only to have them ask for it again.  Everyone at the bank points fingers at everyone else at the bank.  While the real loan officers can track the progress of the loan on their computers, these "fake" officers don't even have the capability of doing that.  We were scheduled to close last Thursday but we can't even get an actual closing date at this point.  The seller's is in his eighties and in poor health.  His daughter called me last night to let me know how disappointed she was in the bank.  The buyer is furious with the bank.  And as for me...Well, a few weeks ago, the seller had some elderly friends who called me to say that they were in pretty much the same boat as my sellers and they would probably be calling me too.  After they get an ear full of what's transpired, I'll be very surprised if I ever hear from them again.  The real loan officers are aware of what's happening and they're not happy about the situation either.  They claim that the bank is going to make changes soon but has had a lot on their plate lately.  Their customer service is absolutely horrendous!  Has anyone else run into anything similar?  Thanks for letting me vent.  As you can imagine, there's a lot more to this story but that's all I'm going to say for now.

How about a little fun for a change?  Today at lunch, several of us were discussing some funny, strange or bizarre stories that have happened to us over the years.  I'll share one with you and hope that some of you might want to share some stories with us.  But first, my story.

Several years ago, my partner and I had two listings on a lake in our town.  One day we went to the property to take photos of the two houses - one was a small cottage and other was a home on the lake itself.  I stopped at the cottage first to explain that we were going to take some photos and we were going to the big house first.  The occupants agreed that this would be ok and we went to take our photos.  After we finished with the big house, we stopped back at the cottage.  It was a hot, August day - probably in the high nineties.  There was a scraggly, old dog on the porch as I walked up to the cottage.  I was holding the dog back with my foot as I knocked on the door.  A voice told me to come in.  I said, "do you want the dog in or out?"  The lady answering said, "It doesn't matter."  So I let the dog walk in with us.  In the next few seconds, several things went through my mind.  As I looked around the room at the renters who were there, there was a grandmother, her adult daughter and the daughters baby who was lying on the floor getting its' diaper changed.  The dog immediately walked over to the baby and started sniffing its face.  Everyone (including the baby) seemed to have a strange look on their faces.  I said to the grandmother, "That is your dog isn't it?"  She answered, "It's not our dog."  I immediately picked up the dog and put him outside.  When I returned to the house, I asked the grandmother, "why did you let the dog in the house?"  She responded, "We thought it was your dog."  I explained to her that we didn't take dogs with us on appointments.

That's it.  It probably seemed funnier at the time.  But what about your stories?

I'm more than a little curious about toll-free hot lines for properties that are for sale.  Or more specifically, other agents experience with them.  I currently use a company called 24/7 Call Capture and if you don't know, it basically works like this:  You assign a certain extension to an ad, a sign, a direct mail piece or anything you use in your advertising.  For example:  When a prospect calls a yard sign with extension 55 on it, the recorded ad gives them basic information about the property - as little or as much as you want to provide.  But the really neat part is that within a couple of seconds, my Treo lets me know that someone called about that property and I also get an email telling me the same thing.  What does it tell me?  First it tells me what property they're calling on and second, it tells me what their telephone number is...even if they have caller ID blocking in place or even if they have an unlisted phone number.  Pretty neat huh?  The idea is that we can call potential buyers back when they are in a buying state of mind.  Not the next day or two hours later but right now.

Anyhow, I would like to know from you folks that are using similar technology, how's it going?  What works and what doesn't?  Thanks.

As a former licensed real estate instructor, I have a wealth of otherwise useless information in my head that pertains to real estate and real estate contracts.  I still teach contracts as part of our local boards' new member orientation about once a month.  I'm not sure about other parts of Florida or other states but the following certainly pertains to purchasing property in Citrus county, Florida.

While working on a sales transaction, we often hear from the bank or lender that they will not require a survey "for this loan."  Gee, that sound good you think.  It will save the buyer some money and everyone will be happy.  The problem is:  It's just not true in about 99% of the time and transactions.  While it starts out to be true, it just doesn't end up that way.  Here's why.  A loan officer may truly believe that their bank won't require a survey.  Their documentation may say that too.  The problem is that the title company will not issue an Alta Form 9 without one.  What the heck is that?  Simply stated, it means that the title company cannot reasonably insure the legal description of the subject property without a survey.  And they will not issue the Alta form without one.  No survey, No Alta, No closing.  When will you find about this requirement?  Well first of all, if  you're lucky, you'll find out about it a few days before closing so you (hopefully) have time to actually get a survey prior to the scheduled closing.  But let's back up a minute.  When your buyer first tells you that their lender is not going to require a survey, make a phone call to that lender.  Verify what the buyer told you.  If the lender agrees with what the buyer said, ask them a simple question.  "Will the bank be ok that the title company will not issue an Alta form?"  They may even say something like, "We're hoping that they will waive that requirement for a survey."  They won't.  Then ask them if the title company won't waive that requirement, are they ok with that?  They'll tell you no and then you will have to order one so you can close on time. 

What happens if you have a cash buyer - Do you still need a survey?  In my humble opinion:  YES!!!  I'll tell you what happens around here once a year or so.  Someone buys a lot out in the middle of nowhere.  They opt not to get a survey at this time.  They don't plan on developing the property for a year or two.  Now fast forward a couple of years.  The buyer goes out to watch the site prep people clear his lot for his new home.  Frantic, he screams at the guy on the bulldozer, "You're on the wrong lot!"  The operator pulls out a survey and says, "nope, we're on the correct lot."  Now, the buyer purchased the correct lot.  Actually, he purchased the lot that was for sale but it wasn't the lot he thought he bought.  He thought he bought the lot with the huge oak tree on it.  How did this happen?  Well, way back when the lot was first listed, the listing agent went out to site of the property.  There weren't any other homes around and he knew they were eight foot wide lots so he found a landmark, maybe the corner of the road and starting walking off 10 feet, 20 feet, 80 feet, 120 feet, etc. until he figured about where the forth lot would be.  He stuck in his "for sale" sign.  And later, that's the lot the buyer made his offer on.  Learn from the mistakes of others - Get a survey.  You'll be glad you did.