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What is a cattle guard?
A cattle guard may be a source of nostalgia but it is NOT a person or a dog.   A cattle guard is:
 
1. The subject of numerous jokes. For example: a popular version on the internet is that President Obama receives a report that Colorado had 100,000 cattle guards on federally owned land. President Obama wants to fire half the cattle guards because the Colorado ranchers protested his proposed changes in grazing policy. Upon hearing this, Vice-President Biden interjects that it would only be fair to  the cattle guards and their families to give them six months of retraining.
President Clinton had been the subject of a nearly identical joke.
2. A time saving device that is placed in a spot on a road easement or right-of-way where a gate would otherwise be needed to keep the cows in their pasture.   A cattle guard eliminates the need to open and close gates.    
Merriam-Webster defines a cattle guard as “A shallow ditch with rails or bars laid across that are spread far enough apart to prevent livestock from crossing but not people or vehicles.  First known use was in 1843.”    
For example, my Dad lives in the ... more

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