ads: "Large Car Pork" - Bacon & Bloopers - MLS Humor
- 11/28/17 02:54 PM
Hi Friends. "Tis the season...so I wanted to share the gift of holiday laughter. Please enjoy a collection of new MLS Bloopers, as well as a few of my favorites I've collected over the years. Happy Holidays! Bacon"Large car pork" (Ham on wheels.) “Easy SOW” (Why hogs should practice safe sex.) “Submit poff of fuunds” (I think you’ve poffed enough already, Dweezil.) “House has new sliding” (And Allstate has new insurance claim.) Achin'"Oven flew in from Italy" (I bet its tiny little arms got tired.) “Skyy views” (Too much Skyy vodka and your view will include porcelain.) “Staggers not done” (They will be when they hit the floor.) “Big windo” (Lay
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ads: “Missle school nearby” - Explosive MLS Bloopers
- 04/22/16 03:46 AM
It’s Blooper Day, friends, so if you want a few hearty laughs, check out these MLS and advertising comments that self-detonated. Amongst these are some of my old favorites, as well as the newest in Blooper Madness. As proper spelling becomes more and more a thing of the past, the gaffes just keep coming: Incoming!“Seller wood carry” (Apparently the seller is a lumberjack.) “Medi room with theater seating” (How do you get the popcorn through the IV?) “No deal with lawyers” (Proudly offered by Sue-mi Assnow.) Fire in the Hole!“Must remove feet” (Who are you - Freddy Krueger?) “Termite and dryrat present” (I hope you don't draw my name for the office
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ads: HILARIOUS HOLIDAY MLS BLOOPERS
- 12/09/14 09:24 AM
Well, folks, by all indications, the holiday partying has started. The MLS was full of bloopers this last week, and it seems we have more than a few tipsy agents running loose in the streets. Here are some chuckles as my gift to you for the holidays: Yule Tid-Bits "Really sweat deal" (Oh, I thought the wet circles under your arm pits were a fashion statement.) "Holiday rice reduction" (So I can't stuff my turkey with beans-n-rice burritos this year?) "This will impact your buyers." (One of my burritos will alleviate that problem fast.) "Take shoes before entering." (Shall I take the shoe from the foot
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ads: “Price per spare foot" - Foot in Mouth Bloopers
- 10/15/14 05:59 AM
The Blooper Blog is back, my friends. Here are some old favorites mixed in with this week's rash of hilarious MLS and real estate advertising gaffes. Please enjoy: Killer deals “Appliances being de livered” (If you want something de-livered, call Hannibal Lecter.) “Best price per spare foot” (I’m sure Lecter would be happy to remove that sucker for you.) “This is a kikker deal!” (This must be the listing agent who has the spare foot.) “Harruy – won’t last!” (Has he tried Viagra?) “Closets by Closet Wizar” (Yet another way
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ads: Donkey under mat" - Overlooking Your Own Asinine Bloopers?
- 07/19/14 11:09 AM
It's the end of another week and the Blooper Blog is back, my friends. There were some amazing gaffes on the MLS and in real estate advertising this week. It seems the need for truncated speech in social media outlets is relegating proper grammar to the past. Kudos to Weird Al Yankovic for the release of his new song, "Word Crimes." It is a parody of Robin Thicke's "Blurred Lines" and hilariously expresses the need for good grammar and spelling - a reminder these agents could use! Please enjoy: Is This Colorado? "Ask agent about grass" (No need
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ads: "Smoky lake view" - Are You Setting Your Career Aflame with Bloopers?
- 06/01/14 08:01 AM
It's blooper time, my friends. I'm back this week with another installment of hilarious MLS and real estate advertising gaffes. Thanks to Jan Pastras and Jane Peters of Los Angeles for some great contributions. Read 'em and weep: (Incidentally - the first 4 bloopers are all from the same listing!) Reflections "Master w/ balcony watches the amazing sun rising" (The master of the house has a balcony...or the balcony has eyes? ...I'm soooo confused.) "Smoky lake view" (News Flash: Your boat is on fire.) "Big nookie off kitchen" (Well I guess that's one way to thank the cook.) "18 degree canyon
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ads: "Quaint bride over creek" & Other Funny MLS Bloopers
- 05/12/14 12:04 PM
The Blooper Blog is back, friends, and this week the side-splitting MLS gaffes did not disappoint. (I swear it would make a great comic strip!) Thanks to Jane Peters and Wanda Kubat-Nerdin for their great blooper finds. Hold on for the chuckles: Huh? "Located between Malibu and Santa Barbara" (Your eye for detail is underwhelming.) "Dull occupancy" (Are you referring to the voice inside your brain?) "Tenant currently occupied" (Unless she's occupied with George Clooney, this does not warrant posting on the MLS.) "Off-side parking" (That's what I do after too many martinis.) "New pics of repaired indoor poo" (Frankly, I
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ads: "Wall space for arf" - Hilarious MLS Bloopers!
- 04/29/14 06:51 AM
It's time for Blooper fun, my friends. The MLS and advertising goofs this past week continue to provide a source of head-scratching - as well as some laugh-out-loud humor. Thanks to Myrl Jeffcoat of Sacramento and Jane Peters of Los Angeles for their great finds. Check out these memorable gaffes: Hanky "Great wall space for arf" (Do you stick the dogs to the wall with Velcro?) "Amenities a hop, skip and a hump." (Sign me up for the last one, please.) "Room with waking closet" (I see dead people.) "Anal membership included" (That's a club I'm not interested in joining.) "New
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ads: "Condo has food bones" - Hilarious Bits & Pieces From the MLS
- 04/09/14 05:34 AM
I'm b-a-a-ack. Yes, it's Blooper Day again, and goofs were everywhere this past week. Reading the MLS was like reading a comic book, and the local real estate ads were even more, uh, "creative." I also received some very funny submissions from my sharp-eyed colleagues. Thanks to Jan Pastras, Jane Peters and Patrick Martin, all of L.A., for their help with all the fun. Please enjoy: Bones "Condo has food bones" (Offered by Carnivore Condos - Motto: "We kill it, we eat it, and then we sell it.") "Construction complete in Mars" (You should consider setting up business there.) "This is a nice hoof"
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ads: "Hand-painted tikes" - Colorful & Hilarious MLS Goofs
- 03/13/14 10:25 AM
It’s time for the Blooper Reel, folks, and this week’s bloopers did not disappoint. Every week I receive contributions from all over the U.S. and Canada. These include hilarious gaffes from MLS sites as well as from real estate ads. Thanks to Patty Da Silva from Davie, Florida and Patrick Martin of L.A. for some whoppers. Names are withheld to protect the guilty, so let’s enjoy a few laughs: Did I Say That? “Nice now - much better than beef” (McDonald’s ad – shortly after the “meat” was identified as wildebeest…) “Just needs a moo” (Said the McDonald’s inspector as he placed a skull and
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ads: "Trainquil setting" - Are You Off-Track Due To Listing Bloopers?
- 01/29/14 10:42 AM
Happy Friday - the Blooper Reel is back! No matter how many times I decide to take a vacation from posting, the gaffes on the MLS and in the local real estate ads are just too hysterical to ignore. Thanks as always for your wonderful contributions – I received some great ones this week from L.A.'s very own agent extraordinaire Jane Peters. Now hold on for the laughter: Goin’ South… “Needs attention for sagging” (Are you referring to my boobs, or Justin Bieber’s pants?) “Leather-cowered walls” (If you were that cow, you’d be cowering, too, pal.) “Desirable area near lark” (Garbled the raccoon
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ads: "Stairs drop don" - Listings That Fall Short Due To MLS Bloopers
- 10/31/13 03:57 AM
Hey, Friends – it’s time for this week’s Blooper Reel. My trusted scouts and I found some crazy real estate advertising and MLS errors this week. Thanks to Jane Peters and Jill Sackler for their help in keeping me afloat in hysterical bloopers. Check these out: No Pain “Separate wings for parents” (I earned my wings and halo the day my five-year-old daughter buttered the railings at school.) “Guess area” (Are you referring to my stove at dinner time?) “New powerful mike” (…Sounds like Mike got lucky last night…) “Substndard plunb” (…Yet not as substandard as your alphabet execution.) No Gain “Wrap this one up in a
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ads: "Very small car garage" - Hilarious MLS Bloopers
- 10/17/13 04:33 AM
Hi, friends – welcome to this week’s edition of “How to shoot yourself in the foot in a public forum.” These advertising and MLS bloopers will keep you laughing, but I am not sure how well they help sell the properties being marketed. After you finish laughing, you can decide: Gone To Waste “MUST be accompanied” (That explains why the guy with the accordion is trailing me.) “Tall pams sway in the breeze” (Is anyone missing a women’s basketball team?) “Call or don’t go” (Gee, Friendly Fran, does your welcome mat say, ”We cook small children”?) “Nice back dried up” (Oh, I just thought you
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ads: "8 horse bar" - Why You Shouldn't Drink and Type
- 09/19/13 05:05 PM
Welcome to this week’s edition of the blooper reel, friends. Not every blooper is a misspelling – some are just nonsensical. Let these gaffes be a reminder that we should not only use spellcheck, but also re-read our work. Otherwise, there could some funny results, as with these funny whoppers: Horsing Around “8 horse bar” (How do they fit their hairy a_ _ es on the stools?) “Seene in Architectural Digess” (So you can spell the big words but not the small ones???) “Dazing chandelier” (Yeah, that happens when a light fixture falls on your head.) “Gret place to call home” (You’d be better off calling a
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ads: "Speed bums" - Are Bloopers Making A Train Wreck of Your Business?
- 09/13/13 03:25 AM
Well, my friends, you are certainly in for some laughs this week. Thanks to Jan Pastras and Carlo Cappomazza of Los Angeles, as well as my Twitter friends at HelpUSell Real Estate for their side-splitting contributions from the MLS and local real estate ads. We never seem to run out, so please enjoy: Going Somewhere? “Open 11 AM – 2 PMS Tues” (I’m already experiencing irritation and minor cramping.) “Chickend cop” (A cop in a chicken suit - this must be the sequel to Undercover Cluck.) "Wine caller in basement" (Yeah - I heard yo' mama likes to drink-n-dial.) “Please sign in
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ads: "Screamed porch" - Hilarious MLS Bloopers
- 09/06/13 05:20 AM
Welcome to the marketing bloopers roundup, folks. As summer draws to an end, it is apparent that spelling has also gone on hiatus. Thanks to Jane Peters of Los Angeles and Patty DaSilva of Davie, Florida for your contributions – you cracked me up! The MLS Mess “Georgeously house” (Ask George if he also does hair.) “School has hight point score” (Obviously that school is not your Alma Mater.) “Neer restorants and shopling” (…And yet so far from reality.) “Covenunt” (To us Catholic school grads, a coven of nuns is redundant.) “Buyer’s should find out permit to responsable” (Agent should buy big dictionary to do the same.)
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ads: "Bar has sh_t decor" - Are You Wasting Your MLS Ad Opps with Bloopers?
- 08/29/13 04:47 PM
It’s Blooper Day again folks, and I found everything from boozes to bruises in the MLS and other real estate advertisements. Some of these gaffes were hard to decipher, but they were all darn funny. Enjoy: Yes Siree, Bob "Bar has shit decor" (In this bar, drinkers literally pull up a stool!) “Pet splay area” (Kick-yo’-ass Alert: I just gave PETA your number, Jack.) “Enjoy the wide ope skies” (Said Andy when he threw Ope out of a helicopter. Or am I confusing my TV shows?) “Porsche swing inc” (How long does it take to go from zero to sixty?) “Sunken tux”
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ads: Is It Okay For Mom To Brag?
- 08/28/13 04:58 AM
Premiere Party - The London Hotel Rooftop - West Hollywood (My daughter, Kristin, and I are in the center.) Dear Friends, In case you missed last night's premiere of Keep the Party Moving on STYLE network, the lovely host is the fruit of my loins. Thus, I hope you will allow a proud mom to brag just a bit, because I thought she was brilliant...and I was sober. The show will be running all week, so please tune in. If you hate reality shows, just turn on the tube and then go vacuum or something. At least the network will
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ads: "Thin is a fixer" - The Straight Skinny on MLS Bloopers
- 08/08/13 05:19 PM
It’s Blooper Day again, my friends. I think the summer heat has fried a few brain cells… or perhaps I am just new to “creative marketing.” You be the judge. Thanks to Bryan Robertson of Palo Alto, CA and Jane Peters of Los Angeles for their side-splitting contributions. Names have been withheld to protect the incompetent. Off to the Races “Great ride off” (It’s a house, pal - not the Kentucky Derby!) “New obligation system installed” (If you're in Jersey, that's Carlo “The Convincer” Capolini and his friendly vice grips.) “Fool pad” (The soft spot between your ears?) “Thin is a fixer.” (Try telling that to Bruce
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ads: "Escape the nose" ...And Other Great MLS Bloopers
- 08/01/13 05:43 PM
What is the most embarrassing typo you have ever made? Mine was when I signed an email with: “Best retards, Gwen.” I can guarantee that some of these bloopers found in the MLS are on someone’s “My Biggest Blooper List.” Keep proof-reading and spell-checking, my friends, or you may be guilty of hilarious gaffes like the following: Heredity “Escape the nose” (The reason the children of Barbara Streisand and Elliott Gould left home.) “Please don’t arrive eerie” (This is Hollywood- that ship has sailed.) “2 acre poverty in Bel Air” (Poverty in Bel Air means someone’s Bentley was repossessed.) “Horse
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