mls: "Correction oven" - Funny Bloopers & Half Baked Listing Remarks - 05/24/13 04:49 PM

It’s Blooper day, and the MLS never disappoints. Thanks to Indiana’s own Bruce Walter and to Jan Pastras of Los Angeles for a number of great contributions this week. I hope you can help me with the last one by adding your comments. I laugh so hard every time I read it that I cannot come up with a retort! Check out these classics:
For the Record… “Italian liquor throughout” (This must be the autopsy report for Sonny Corleone.)
“Polish cement floors.” (What’s in them – Kielbasa?)
"See the surprise over the mountains” (Why is it that only drunks in … (21 comments)

mls: "Natural wildlife coroner" - Are Bloopers Killing Your Listings? - 05/17/13 09:57 AM

It’s Blooper day once again, my friends. There were enough typo casualties in the nationwide MLS listings this past week to fill an English Grammar ER. These are the cases that required serious triage, and of course, I was happy to help.  Please enjoy:
The Oozy “Nice wounded area” (The area where the arrow impaled your skull, no doubt.)
“Calf after 7 pm.” (Apparently someone is having sliders for dinner…)
“Natural wildlife coroner” (High roadkill area, huh?)
“Scream setting” (Sign posted outside the IRS.)
“Call if still.” (I wish you had told me that before my last date.)
The Schmoozy … (29 comments)

mls: "Curved stares" - Hysterical MLS Missteps - 05/09/13 11:46 PM

Hi, friends – as usual, there were a lot of gaffes and laughs in the MLS and real estate advertising outlets this past week. Thanks to Michael Jacobs of Pasadena for his hilarious contribution about a very special townhouse. Thanks also to Patrick Martin of Los Angeles for some great finds, including a house on Nimrod Lane (I’m serious, folks). Enjoy:
Cold and Colder “Submit proffof ffunds” (Did someone spill some ice down her knickers?)
“New single reticence” (I bet that alimony will loosen you up.)
“Great for irritating” (Let me guess – the first words your mother ever said to … (50 comments)

mls: "Submit by last Thurs" ...Falling Flat on Your Face Due to Bloopers? - 05/03/13 12:16 AM

The blooper reel is back, friends. Never does a week go by without a rash of contributions of bloopers from all over the U.S. Some are baffling, while others are simply hysterical. These were my favorites from this week’s whoppers. Please enjoy:
The Walking Dead “Be part of the housing doom” (Yellowed sign in the underwriters’ room at Bank of America.)
“Bull in wood cabinets” (Crap in pants of cowering owner.)
“New radwood fence” (Groovy, dude. Peace out.)
“Area known for it’s Rock n Roll rots” (You must be referring to Keith Richards, who began rotting in the 60′s.)
“Many film … (35 comments)

mls: "Gallows kitchen" - Hanging Yourself With Advertising Bloopers? - 04/25/13 11:50 PM

It’s Blooper Day! From coke to communists, this week’s rash of MLS and real estate marketing errors will tickle your buns, folks. If you’re guilty of such egregious errors, it’s time to hire a proof-reader or hang up your license. Read ‘em and weep:
Tiptoe Through the Tulips “Don’t walk on glass” (Reason # 1 to set down your mug before toppling off a bar stool.)
“Gallows kitchen” (For cooks like me who inspire guests to hang themselves.)
“See Sunday Guido” (Is this an ad from the Newark Caravan Guide?)
“In kitchen, two designs mary” (Is there also an image of … (77 comments)

mls: “Please tex me" - Texas-sized MLS Bloopers - 04/19/13 12:12 AM

Lions and tigers and bears, oh my! The monster MLS bloopers just keep coming, and marketing mistakes seem to be endless these days. Welcome to the Blooper Reel and a springtime selection of hilarious gaffes:
The Time Crunch “No appointments before 9 pam” (You must be on Wrong Coast Time.)
“No showings after dak” (So after Dak, is every other guy a disappointment?)
“Please tex me” (What were you expecting – a big hat and a saddle?)
“No calls at diner please” (While you’re there, pick me up a ham on rye.)
“Blackout cretins” (Have they considered joining AA?)
The … (34 comments)

mls: "Lab pool" - Are Your Listings Drowning in Hilarious Bloopers? - 04/12/13 12:50 AM

April 1 has come and gone, but fools are here to stay. Nowhere is it more apparent than on the MLS and in real estate ads. These marketing errors have been submitted from all over the U.S. and Canada. Check out these blooper dandies, friends:
All Wet “Lab pool” (My dog is happy just to splash around in the toilet.)
“Peasant surroundings” (Sneered an unrepentant Leona Helmsley as she was hauled to her new home at Danbury Federal Correctional Institute.)
“Twilight wine, cheese and jazz troll” (Hence the music coming from under the bridge…)
“New wal paint and tram” (I suggest you … (37 comments)

mls: “Big poach for leisure” - Listing Remarks That Laid An Egg - 04/05/13 12:28 AM
  TGIF! Yes, it's Friday, and I'm b-a-a-a-ack. The blooper scooper picked up some hilarious bloopers this week, friends. From sins to insurgents, this was a colorful week for real estate property listings. Check out these memorable gaffes:
When Less is More “No dogs insides” (Bragged Wan Lo Wang about his restaurant menu.)
“Come in – get worm” (Warning to those who eat at Wan Lo Wang’s. )
“Electric walk in kitchen” (That explains the ”stir-fried feet” on Wan Lo Wang’s menu.)
“Big poach for leisure” (Newsflash to Wan Lo Wang: It’s hard to relax when you’re up to your a_ _ … (64 comments)

mls: Going Downhill With Your MLS Bloopers? - 03/29/13 12:26 AM

Spring is here, and I can already see that we’re going to have a bumper crop of MLS and real estate advertising bloopers this year, folks. Some of these are hilarious. Thanks to Christine Donovan of Costa Mesa, Jane Peters of Los Angeles and Jill Sackler of Long Island for adding to the laughter.
Dumb! “Come in from the cod” (For what porpoise?)
“No seat” (Are you selling homes or urinals?)
“Has large debt” (So now we're selling the U.S.?)
“Private, must show member” (I just thought you were a pickle salesman…)
“Thankless water heater” (You sound like my Jewish grandmother.)
… (36 comments)

mls: "Come enjoy mature" - Hilarious MLS Bloopers That Never Grow Old - 03/15/13 12:54 AM

It's Friday, and the Blooper Scooper is back, friends.  The MLS and local real estate advertising provided a bumper crop of blunders this week, as submissions from all over the country rolled in. Thanks to Susan McCall of Portland, Patty Da Silva of Davie, Florida and L.A.’s home girl, Jane Peters, for adding to the fun. I know you all agree that it’s time we start proofreading, using spell-check, and avoiding Siri, but then how else could we legally have this much fun? Enjoy the laughs:
I Feel Your Pain “Double pane windows have some sensation” (Do they say “ouch”?)
“Lovely … (30 comments)

mls: “Don’t expsct pefection” Are Your Listings Revealing The Real You? - 03/08/13 12:18 AM

Ah, at last it's Friday, and the fun continues. It’s time for the blooper reel, my friends, and as usual, there is no dearth of material. Thanks to Jane Peters of Los Angeles, Bruce Walter of West Lafayette, Indiana, and Michael Jacobs of Pasadena, CA. for some great submissions this week. Bruce even supplied the final quip. My posse never does me wrong. Please enjoy:
For the Kiddies “Playroom inc bouncy cattle” (Milkshakes anyone?)
“Viyl flooring” (Not as vile as your spelling)
“House sits on ben” (Hence Ben’s smashed shoes protruding from the crawl space vent.)
“New grazed tile” (How did … (20 comments)

mls: "Instant hog water" - Excess Pork in Your Listings? (MLS Bloopers) - 03/01/13 12:30 PM

The Blooper Reel is back, my friends. This week’s offering of marketing typos from the MLS included everything from stewed hogs to bowel problems. Read ‘em and weep:
Did You Just Say That? “Close to square” (Lamented SpongeBob SquarePants when asked to explain his lone pant leg.)
“Instant hog water” (Said farmer Fred sheepishly when asked why little Susie’s 4-H pig was missing.)
“2 inches rock hard” (Bragged Mickey Mouse to Minnie during foreplay.)
“Park only in detonated area” (What blew up – your career?) 
Maybe You Should Think Before Speaking “Hot and chick area with EZ freeway access” (For … (30 comments)

mls: "Sledding doors" - Are Your Listings Going Downhill Due to Bloopers? - 02/22/13 12:35 AM

If the guy next to you has something yellow on his face, it may be egg. Yes, folks, it's Friday once again, and the Blooper Blog is back with some very embarrassing marketing blunders. Check out these hilarious MLS gaffes…and then go proofread your own listing remarks, or you, too, could end up in the Blooper Hall of Fame:
Fruits and Nuts “Plum missing” (Offered by Little Jack Horner Real Estate and Produce Company. )
“Overlooks steam” (For those in the market for a porno movie theater...)
“Sink spayer missing” (How does one spay a dog in a sink? …And that … (36 comments)

mls: “Bull in cabnets" - Gaffes and Laughs on the MLS - 02/15/13 09:56 AM

It was another week of fun and marketing folly on the MLS, friends. Welcome back to the Blooper Blog. Are you one of the guilty perps who published any of these hysterical sales pitches?
What’s That Smell? “Garage has n odoor” (So do your feet, but I wouldn’t consider that a selling point.)
“Mouton home” (Now we know why Mary’s Little Lambs disappeared so suddenly.)
“Wow assking” (Whispered Snoop to Ice T when he spotted the colossal a__ on Ice’s wife..)
“Hosting multiple peeviews this weekend” (Groaned one urinal to the other in the men’s restroom at Gold’s Gym.)
“Compound … (30 comments)

mls: "Register gnome" - More MLS Blooper Madness! - 02/07/13 11:29 PM
Welcome to this week’s marketing typo blooper reel, friends. Apparently Siri and auto-spell have become my writing partners, as a lot of these real estate advertising gaffes would suggest. I prefer to believe that haste makes waste, and not that stupidity is on the rise… but you be the judge. Thanks to Margaret Goss of Winnetka, IL, Jane Peters of Los Angeles, and Patty DaSilva from Davie, FL for their hilarious MLS blooper finds. Please enjoy:
Some Folks Misfire “Buyers live to love in this area” (Welcome to The Shady Lady Ranch.)
“Really rice house” (Thank you, Wan Lobe Missin.)
“Big … (22 comments)

mls: “Home on right side of toad” MLS Bloopers - Warts and All - 01/31/13 11:56 PM

The Blooper Blog is back, friends. Thanks to Bruce Walter of West Lafayette, Indiana for a laundry list of hysterical blooper finds. Believe it or not, only one was from L.A. this week! Maybe word is getting out that Big Bother is watching. Uh, Big Brother. No, let’s stick with Bother. Check out these very funny marketing typos:
My Kind of Man “Handy man wanted 3 bedrooms” (He’s not only handy, he’s energetic!)
“Partial basemen” (That explains the wooden legs in the dugout.)
“Most lightening is missing” (That’s because it touched down in your cranium.)
“Dining rm with double foreplace” … (38 comments)

mls: “Large fester” - Hilarious MLS Blooper Eruptions - 01/26/13 04:46 PM

Hi, Friends. It probably doesn’t come as a surprise to anyone that the blooper reel is back with more gaffes than I have time to tripe...uh, I mean "type". Thanks to Jan Pastras and Patrick Martin of Los Angeles for their very funny (albeit pathetic) blooper submissions. I am beginning to think that proper spelling is hysterectomy…or whatever Siri thought I just said. Enjoy:
That’s Not What I Said “Jazzmen trees” (That explains why Herbie Hancock is hanging from my tree.)
“Enter another wad” (Grinned Brewers outfielder Nyjer Morgan while shoving a plug of nasty tobacco into his gob.)
“Feed the … (67 comments)

mls: "Holidie with us" - 15 Blooper Deal-Killers - 01/18/13 01:03 AM

For those of you just returning, welcome back to the 2013 Blooper Blog, friends. As expected, the year started out with a number of hysterical real estate marketing bloopers from the MLS and from real estate ads all over the U.S. Thanks to Patty DaSilva of Davie, FL for her great contributions. Please enjoy:
Ringing in the Nude…uh, I mean “New” “Nude and slick” (Caption under Anthony Weiner's Twitter photo.)
“Rein damage” (Explained Rudolph when asked about his ugly bald patches.)
“This home will see itself” (Ah…a house with insight!)
“Beautiful 4 Bd/2 Ba bed horse” (Who knew the Trojan horse had … (24 comments)

mls: "Peace and statuary" - Hilarious Marketing Bloopers - 01/10/13 11:17 PM

Here we go again – it’s Blooper Madness. Honestly folks, these marketing typos and ridiculous gaffes are not all from here in Los Angeles. A.R.'s own Bruce Walter will back me up on that, as a lot of these head-scratchers come from his local area of Indiana. I get submissions from everywhere, so I guess all the nuts haven’t rolled to California after all…although I will admit that we have a surplus. Please enjoy:
That had to Hurt “Updates include 200 amo electrical” (Obviously you’ve tested that by sticking your tongue in an outlet.)
“Beautiful mud century detailing” (I’ll alert the shepherds.)
“3 Bad/Ba” … (82 comments)

mls: Ya' Can't Fix Stupid: 2012's Best MLS Blooper Round-up - 12/28/12 09:59 PM
   
Friends, it seems everyone has a Top 10 List of some kind as the year rolls to a close, so why shouldn't we have one here at AR? These are my top picks for Blooper of the Year from my weekly MLS blooper blog. Read, enjoy, and have a wonderful 2013!
 
 
Bend Over
 
 
“Buyers will flock like bees to hiney” (Now we know the origin of the saying, "That's a sweet piece of a_ _!" )
 
 
 
“Area to add poon” (Nope, not going there...) 
 
"Submit forks by Tues." (Or what, I'm forked?) 
 
"Truly … (100 comments)

 
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Gwen Banta

Los Angeles, CA

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Sotheby's International Realty

Address: 9255 Sunset Blvd, Mezzanine, West Hollywood, CA, 90069

Office Phone: (310) 205-0305 x 140

Cell Phone: (323) 252-1700

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A very humorous Blog that highlights gaffes from the MLS and real estate ad bloopers.


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