humor: The Craigslist Version - 04/21/08 07:58 PM
I know, I know.
Some of you won't believe anything until you see it on Craigslist.
After all, what kind of broker would I be if I couldn't even afford twenty-five bucks to advertise for you on Craigslist?
So here you go, here's the ad on Craigslist. 
You drive a hard bargain.  That's precisely … (9 comments)

humor: Top Ten Rejected Real Estate Mottos - 11/16/07 08:54 PM
These may help you in your marketing efforts.
This list was reprinted by permission from the Roseville Real Estate Blog.Since I'm the author, of that blog, it was pretty easy to get permission.  I asked myself if I could have permission, then I said "no" and so I said "pretty please!!" and … (11 comments)

humor: Video: How to Sell a Home FAST In Any Market - 10/04/07 03:48 PM
This video shows how to get a home sold FAST in any market, and is appropriate for Realtors®, sellers, staging professionals, and others who want to ensure a fast sale in a down market, or an up market, or any kind of market in which there are houses.
Not only will you … (9 comments)

humor: Real Estate Definitions that I Wish Were Funnier - 09/11/07 09:56 AM
Buyer.  Noun.  Person who thinks the home is worth $50,000 less than the price given by the comps.
Seller.  Noun.  Person who thinks a home is worth $50,000 more than the price given by the comps.
The comps.  Noun.  A record of transactions completed by buyers and sellers who have been … (4 comments)

humor: Known Universe Graphed. Inhabitants Unimpressed. - 07/11/07 11:27 PM
This evening Cameron Park real estate blogger and amateur cosmologist John Lockwood (I mean REALLY amateur) released his latest analysis of the universe as we know it, after extensive research.  Also, this was after working on a long inspection of a house with electricity and trees, having a chat with Purva … (9 comments)

humor: Top Ten Rejected Real Estate Mottos - 06/06/07 03:42 PM
Real Estate Mottos Did you ever notice that Real Estate Agents always seem to have three important things?
Nice cars we may or may not be able to afford. Our pictures on our business cards. Some kind of motto that describes our business. Well, naturally I've noticed it, too -- … (0 comments)

 
Real Estate Brokerage: Elite Properties
John Lockwood
Sacramento, CA
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