humor: If Cupid Were A Realtor... - 02/13/07 04:46 PM
Most of us know who Cupid is. He's that guy who goes around shooting arrows at people so they fall in love. Right? But what you probably didn't know is Cupid had a second occupation. He was a realtor, too. (Or, at least Cupid should have been.) The real estate business … (1 comments)
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humor: :: Barrie Home owners say "Enough with the snow already" :: - 02/12/07 09:33 PM
About this time each year the winter weather has lost its novelty and I find myself looking out the window trying to mentally recall what the yard looked like before the snow started. In the last couple weeks we have gone from a nice thin powdery cover on the ground, which … (4 comments)
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humor: All Americans Can Own Their Own Home, Just Not For Very Long - 02/12/07 12:29 PM
for the last 5 or 6 years, it has been a Mantra of the Administration, and of Realtors and Mortgage Companies, that "All Americans can own their own homes."
We have seen interest rates at all time lows, with new lending programs for 100% financing, interest only loans, and even negative … (9 comments)
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humor: Dear Mister Banker - 02/11/07 11:28 PM
I almost went to bed before reading my email tonight ... good thing I didn't. This was sent to me by a banker friend of mine ...
Dear Bank Manager, I am writing to thank you for bouncing the check with which I endeavored to pay my plumber last month. By … (1 comments)
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humor: Quick Mortgage Humor - 02/09/07 06:05 PM
Q: What is the difference between a man and a mortgage?
-
-
A: A Mortgage matures after 30 years.
Q: What do you get when you cross an underwriter and a Latin Teacher?
-
-
A: Someone that enjoys declining loans.
I have a much longer joke that I will post when I figure out exactly how to write … (0 comments)
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humor: :: Flipper Nation: Episode III :: - 02/09/07 08:15 AM
Wow! Judging from the page visits to the first two episodes; people are really enjoying this. I can't promise when the next episode of "Flipper Nation" is going to be available as it is still in the creation stages. Ill keep everyone posted.
Click on the link to view the most … (1 comments)
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humor: Please don't put Broker Bryant in the garbage!!! - 02/08/07 02:57 PM
OK, so you'll like this one. I send out quite a few post cards every month. They are jumbo, high gloss and usually have something humorous or seasonal on the front. I've been doing this for years.
Anyway, yesterday while I was sitting around, "working" on ActiveRain, I received a call from … (31 comments)
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humor: Reflections from Boomer’s Back Porch—top 10 reasons to read this Blog! - 02/08/07 05:41 AM
Good morning Gentle Reader. It is -6ºF (feels like -20ºF) this fine St. Paul morning on Boomer’s back porch.
Today we have a couple of things for you, the first being our new porcelain, not china or stoneware “Custom Codger Mug” available only until the end of this month, … (10 comments)
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humor: :: Till death do us part :: - 02/07/07 08:50 PM
I saw this picture this morning reading the paper and caught it again jumping around the internet tonight. A 5000 year old couple discovered locked eternally in an embrace near Mantova, Italy.
The picture is one of those that begs for a clever and or funny caption underneath Does anyone have any … (0 comments)
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humor: Afternoon Humor! - 02/07/07 03:12 PM
I hope no one is offended by this but it sure made me laugh:
A driver is stuck in a traffic jam on US 95 south, just outside ofWashington.Nothing is moving north or south. Suddenly a man knocks on his window.The driver rolls down his window and asks, "What happened? What's thehold … (1 comments)
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humor: Where's the House? - 02/07/07 07:14 AM
I'm still searching listings for my buyers and keep getting slapped in the face with these crazy photos.
For your consideration, here's a photo taken directly from our local MLS:
Below is what's in the COMMENTS field:
Here we have a gorgeous, green tree for sale. We'll even throw in the house for free! To … (4 comments)
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humor: Bad, Bad Photos... - 02/07/07 06:43 AM
I was checking our MLS for some listings for a buyer and came across this little ditty.
I honestly don't know why a listing agent would market a property like this. It's such a dis-service to his seller. If you can get past not being able to see the room, you surely … (16 comments)
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humor: Brokerage Staff Meetings: The Usual and The Starbucked!! - 02/06/07 10:01 PM
UPDATE: If you liked this post, please subscribe to my BLOG. Thank you =)
It started out in the usual way. We met at the mutually agreed upon day and time in the same amazing office place. We began with coffee, tea, and a convivial spirit. Maybe we should have cut down … (20 comments)
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humor: Any Homebrewers in the Rain? - 02/06/07 06:20 PM
I have experimented with some homebrewing -- home winemaking, actually.
I have some grapes growing in my back yard, so one year I decided to experiment. I bought a back countyry how-to book that included some wine recipes. I made a 5 gallon batch that ended up being strong enough to ignite … (0 comments)
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humor: The Chicken or the Egg? - 02/06/07 05:58 PM
The Chicken or the Egg?
Ah....the age old question. Who really pays the commission? The Buyer (chicken) or the Seller (egg)? Well, let me see if my limited intelligence can come up with a suitable answer, at least from my point of view. OK here goes.....a Real Estate transaction is an … (29 comments)
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humor: GOOD FREAKING MORNING GENTLE READER, IT’S FREAKING COLD OUT HERE ON MY PORCH! - 02/05/07 05:57 AM
WHERE DID THAT COME FROM? I READ ARDELL’S FREAKING POST AND HER STYLE SEEMED TO HAVE RUBBED FREAKING OFF!
Well, she did evoke 111 comments. We’re all about comments. LOOK AT THE FREAKING NAME OF OUR BLOG: “CYBER CAFÉ & BACK PORCH CONVER-FREAKING-SATIONS!” Sorry—I can’t help myself.
Today we (the FREAKING (oops) … (25 comments)
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humor: Reflections from my Back Porch—Jay’s High-Anxiety Adventure in a new Digi-camera Purchase - 02/04/07 09:50 AM
First—for our friends of the temperate parts of the country—I don’t believe the temperature ever went above 0ºF yesterday, I’s hovering around -13ºF on my back porch this morning, with a relatively light (8mph) wind making it feel like -26ºF. Needless to say, I didn’t tarry long on the porch.
… (18 comments)
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humor: The Other Side Of The Pillow Is Cool.... - 02/03/07 02:43 PM
Ever think you were the only one that knew something? Ask the older folks...the ones over 70 secrets to life...what they have learned. You will hear common themes and if you really try to implement them into your life strategy, you could save some steps. On marriage, older couple will tell … (0 comments)
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humor: Chief Laughing Pun & Frog Loan Toofer - 02/01/07 01:42 PM
An Indian chief had three wives, each of whom was pregnant. The first gave birth to a boy. The chief was so elated he built her a teepee made of deer hide. A few days later, the second gave birth, also to a boy. The chief was very happy. He built … (2 comments)
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humor: The Perfect Tenant :) - 01/28/07 11:29 PM
OK... My wife forwarded me this email last night. I tried to find out the original source of the email, but could not trace it back to one single individual... so the author is ANONYMOUS. Hope you enjoy. :)
Got Beer... A Landlord's NightmareA SINGLE GUY LIVED IN THIS TOWNHOUSE FOR 8 … (33 comments)
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humor: AR Comedy Club - Featured Posts Update - 01/24/07 02:20 PM
Friends, ARians, and Comedians,
I appologize for slacking on my administrative duties of featuring top comedic posts on a weekly basis. I have become, like most others in the industry, rather busy since the first of the year and have had to cut back on my involvement on certain activities.
I have made Marc … (9 comments)
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humor: Joke-New Year's Resolutions for Internet Junkies - 01/24/07 08:46 AM
I will try to figure out why I *really* need 9 e-mail addresses.
I will stop sending e-mail to my wife (husband).
I resolve to work with neglected children -- my own.
I will answer my snail mail with the same enthusiasm with which I answer my e-mail.
I will stop sending e-mail, ICQ, Instant … (2 comments)
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humor: Free tickets---WHAT???? - 01/24/07 07:56 AM
So I was listening to the radio this morning. 91.9 New Life It makes me feel good in the mornings because of the family friendly programming and what not. Anyway, I was "getting my wholesomeness on" when the DJ relays a story from the news.
Apparently, a family on an AirTran flight … (9 comments)
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humor: A Duck Walks Into A Bar ... - 01/23/07 11:29 PM
A duck walks into a bar and orders a beer and a sandwich. The bartender looks at him and says, "But you're a duck.""I see your eyes are working," replies the duck. "And you talk!" exclaims the bartender. "I see your ears are working too," says the duck, "Now can I … (2 comments)
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humor: That is Amazing - 01/23/07 11:08 PM
One night a woman found her husband standing over their newborn baby's crib.Silently she watched him. As he stood looking down at the sleeping infant, she saw on his face a mixture of emotions: disbelief, doubt, delight, amazement, enchantment, skepticism. Touched by his unusual display of deep emotions, she felt … (5 comments)
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humor: The Pacific Northwest According To Jeff Foxworthy - 01/23/07 04:50 PM
1. You know the state flower (Mildew) 2. You feel guilty throwing aluminum cans or paper in the trash. 3. Use the statement "sun break" and know what it means. 4. You know more than 10 ways to order coffee. 5 You know more people who own boats than air conditioners. … (0 comments)
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humor: Joke - The World's Smartest Man? - 01/23/07 03:29 PM
A pilot, Michael Jordon, Bill Gates, the Pope, and a pizza delivery man were all in a plane together traveling through stormy conditions.Suddenly, the pilot came running back to the passengers and announced that lightning had hit the plane, and they were going to crash in a matter of minutes. "There … (1 comments)
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humor: Joke-If you had what I have - 01/22/07 03:44 PM
A guy runs into a bar and says, "Bartender, quick! Give me 20 shots of the best Scotch!"
So the bartender lines up 20 shots of his best Scotch and watches this guy down one after the other.
"Man," the bartender says, "I've never seen anyone drink shots that fast!" "You'd drink … (3 comments)
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humor: Joke - Baseball Heaven? - 01/20/07 08:03 PM
… (3 comments)
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humor: AR Withdrawals...... - 01/20/07 09:18 AM
Okay.....for the last two days I have begun to have Withdrawal symptoms..For those of you who have never been through withdrawals, they are as follows...
1. Anxiety
2. hair pulling tendencies
3. sweats
4. irritability
5. sweaty palms
6. constantly checking the website to see if it is up again
7. restarting computer over and over
8. begin … (24 comments)
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humor: What happens when people of differant occupations get old - 01/18/07 07:44 PM
What happens when people of different occupations get old.- Old accountants never die, they just lose their balance.- Old actors never die, they just drop apart.- Old archers never die, they just bow and quiver.- Old architects never die, they just lose their structures.- Old bankers never die, they just lose … (3 comments)
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humor: Business one-liners - 01/18/07 11:01 AM
A President of a democracy is a man who is always ready, willing, and able to lay down your life for his country.A backscratcher will always find new itches; a brown-noser will always find new sense.A bad day fishing is better than a good day at work.A bird in the bush … (2 comments)
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humor: Joke - Girl and Dog - 01/17/07 10:21 AM
A little girl and her dog are walking through the forest when they suddenly fall into a pit. They scramble and scramble but can''t make their way out. The little girl yells, the dog barks, but no one is around to hear their calls for help. Slowly, the night sky turns … (1 comments)
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humor: Who Knew? - 01/16/07 01:28 PM
It's amazing what real estate legal research reveals. For example, while researching liens, I came across this Washington statute:
Every person who arrests, attaches, detains, or claims to detain any human remains for any debt or demand, or upon any pretended lien or charge, is guilty of a gross misdemeanor.
Who knew?
… (4 comments)
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humor: The ActiveRain WOW Picture Contest - 01/15/07 12:24 PM
There is a contest that Microsoft is now holding to select what I think will be a background photo for future Vista releases (?). There is a prize for the winner anyway, I'm just assuming that the winning photo will be somehow incorporated into Vista. In any case, it's always a … (17 comments)
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humor: I'm not closing unless you "chip in"!! - 01/14/07 05:51 PM
If you have read my Blog, then you know, that I work alone. I'm an independent Broker and I work from my home. I have done business this way for almost 10 years and I love it! It gives me lots of freedom and the money I save on overhead, can … (57 comments)
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humor: This Week's Featured Post in "You've GOT to be Kidding!" - 01/14/07 04:44 PM
Chris- yes, I know I promised to feature you every week, but this week ya lost.
The Featured Post for w.e. 1/14/2007 is:
Can you feel the tension......?
Ed Brophy's blog entry -Some People Take the Cake- An Honest to Goodness Phone Call.
If you haven't already read it … (14 comments)
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humor: My new Stephanie! - 01/13/07 10:52 AM
I have not yet bragged on my new daughter on this site. Here she is. Stephanie Ruth Wecks my third child and third girl was born on December 10. She and mama are doing well. Although we are all a little sleepy in my household these days.
I have a funny … (12 comments)
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humor: And Now For Something REALLY Important! - 01/13/07 07:01 AM
Everybody join me in wishing Madison Price a Happy First Birthday!
The little cutie in the picture is the daughter of Jason and Trish Price.
You all know Jason of Knightlines Mortgage Services, LLC he's the guy who always tries to beat me at golf- I promise I'll … (51 comments)
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humor: Meet my Assistant.... - 01/10/07 05:59 PM
Meet my Assistant Sammy.....
"Ahhh, here's the file!"
Sammy is excellent at punching holes (whether I want a hole punched or not!) and no one can shred paper and documents better ("I wanna shred the paper you're reading...right now!") She enjoys using a computer (abusing the keys is the most fun!). Sometimes I … (13 comments)
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humor: What Would Jeff Foxworthy Say? - 01/08/07 09:07 PM
If Jeff Foxworthy was at a convention for home seller's as the spokesperson for Home Stagers, what would he say?
If you have Christmas lights on your house in July - you need a home stager! If you have a collection of beach bottles in your windows - you need a … (38 comments)
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humor: This Week's "You've GOT to be kidding" Featured Article.... - 01/07/07 07:44 PM
OK all the votes are in,
The chads - hanging or otherwise - have been accounted for,
This weeks Featured Post is: City Landmarks Come In All Shapes, Sizes and Names by Chris Griffith.
Granted, her self-image needed a boost, but I really felt that her dedication to promoting local businesses - especially ones who'd … (8 comments)
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humor: Image of Elvis Seen in Diner Near Asheville. - 01/07/07 06:23 PM
ASHEVILLE -
Unsuspecting real state clients out looking for "green" pastures like the one pictured here, about a half hour north of Asheville, North Carolina were astonished today when they noticed an image of Elvis in photographs taken by their REALTOR®. (see below)
Armed with pen, paper and maps, … (28 comments)
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humor: Universal Wisdom And The Refrigerator Door - 01/07/07 05:39 PM
After 45 years of life experience, I've come to the conclusion that the single greatest source of wisdom in the universe is the refrigerator door.My first experience with this came on my Mammaw's refrigerator door in Grafton, West Virginia. To this day I can remember her hand written note. It was … (149 comments)
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humor: Over the Hedge! - 01/06/07 01:56 PM
Has anyone seen the movie Over the Hedge?
I know they do not say that the "bad girl" Glady$$$ is a real estate agent but they don't have to.
Here is the evidence:
1. Yes she spells her name on her black escalade with dollar signs. (Three of them)
2. She wears … (0 comments)
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humor: OK, Who HATES New Years Resolution Lists?!? - 01/03/07 07:34 AM
I absolutely
hate,
HATE
HATE
them myself!
Ever notice how they all seem to be just about the same?
I figure, if something is wrong, bothers you, needs to be changed, etc., then do it THEN! Don't wait for 'cutesy list' time to roll around!
Anyways, since I was tagged to do this by a Friend, I figured … (22 comments)
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humor: Old Men (and one young Woman) & Coffee Shops—Our most Blatant Case of Self-Promotion—Ever! - 12/31/06 09:12 AM
MEDFORD: “Today’s meeting of the ‘Old Men & Coffee Shops’ is taking place right NOW!”
JAY: “So, c’mon in, grab a chair by the front-plate-glass window, Molly will get you a china, not stoneware mug of organically & shade grown cup of (your choice of blends—we have ‘em all) coffee.”
… (59 comments)
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humor: You've GOT to be Kidding - 2006 Final Features - 12/31/06 08:29 AM
As we close out 2006 and get ready to start another great year I just wanted to feature 2 more posts.
First we have How About a Quick $50 by Rich Kruse that reports on how a thick-headed buyer's agent went a little overboard.
Sorry I didn't wright this up last week Rich, I know … (15 comments)
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humor: Taking Children To Work: Expect the Unexpected - 12/30/06 05:40 PM
When my daughter was a child, I didn't always have a babysitter on weekends. Since real estate agents work on weekends, I had to either turn down business or take her with me to show houses. Naturally, I scooped her up and took her along.
To make it more enjoyable for her, … (1 comments)
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humor: Transfer of Land in North Carolina. It's History by "Metes and Bounds" - 12/30/06 09:58 AM
Land transfers in the State of North Carolina may bring with them metes and bounds and mystery. Be prepared for bits of history written between the lines in old land surveys, and also be ready for a challenge when you decipher them. Interested in definitions?...Metes... "A boundary defined by the measurement … (10 comments)
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humor: Old Men & Coffee Shops—Molly Gets a Face!—and a Choice! - 12/30/06 05:48 AM
“YOU’RE LATE!” exclaimed my old new friend Molly (Cyber Café manager) as I entered the Cyber-Café for our Friday morning meeting of the coffee shop codgers, “The other opinionated old goats are already seated up front, by the front plate-glass window, with their china not stoneware mugs of organically & … (24 comments)
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humor: Why Me? - Two More Oddball Situations......... - 12/28/06 06:03 PM
Both of these crazy stories happened at a company I no longer work for - long ago and far, far away.
One day I'm checking on my files in the Processor's office - I had to do it myself because she was having her daily lunch with one of the owners - that … (12 comments)
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humor: My First Active Rain Joke - It's a gooden! - 12/28/06 02:24 PM
Einstein dies and goes to heaven only to be informed that his room is not yet ready. "I hope you will not mind waiting in a dormitory. We are very sorry, but it's the best we can do and you will have to share the room with others" he is told … (4 comments)
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humor: House Wife? Homemaker? Home Orchestrator? - 12/28/06 01:46 PM
My wife is in the operating room right this moment. I'm in the lobby on the wireless card. She's having a novasure endometrial thermal ablation performed. (I think I may just have voided the patient privacy documents.) For some of you this may already be too much information.
If you're already … (32 comments)
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humor: I actually know at least one Realtor with this mindset... :( - 12/27/06 09:40 AM
A doctor, a lawyer and a real estate agent were discussing the relative merits of having a wife or a mistress.The lawyer says: "For sure a mistress is better. If you have a wife and want a divorce, it causes all sorts of legal problems."The doctor says: "It's better to have … (3 comments)
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humor: Real Estate Ads - and what they REALLY mean... - 12/27/06 09:37 AM
A friend is sending me some of those (one or two a week). Here is my collection so far...
CHARMING - Tiny. Snow White might fit, but five of the dwarfs would haveto find their own place. See "Cute," "Enchanting," and "Good Starter Home."MUCH POTENTIAL - Grim. Steer clear unless you … (2 comments)
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humor: Help! My New Listing Has a Fish n' Flush! - 12/26/06 08:49 PM
Usually, I have no problem. Most of my clients have outstanding taste, and they either have used the services of a professional decorator or they could come pretty close to being one. But sometimes I get "one of those".I admit, I am at a loss. My new clients have a decorating … (104 comments)
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humor: A Self Help Book With a HUGE Dose of Humor! - 12/24/06 06:38 PM
Ben Stein cracks me up - 3 of his books: How to Ruin Your Life, How to Ruin Your Love Life and How to Ruin Your Financial Life are side-splitters.
That is, if you can handle scarcasm and a very dry wit.
These books are filled with examples of what NOT … (15 comments)
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humor: Bob and Doug's Days of Christmas. - 12/23/06 12:40 PM
I was going to post this the other day and I kept getting distracted.
Then I read a few of Lee Krepps posts - I cracked up and I mentioned a song I remembered from the late 70's / early 80's.
Do any of you remember the characters Bob and Doug McKenzie - the … (7 comments)
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humor: The Golf Tournament of the Year - Part 2................ - 12/23/06 11:42 AM
After an unfortunate rain delay on Friday, the Marc vs Jason End-of-Year Tournament finally got going this morning at about 7:30 EST!
As the crack security team held back the adoring crowds (in my mind, that is) we approached the first tee at the Jupiter Dunes Golf Club.
As … (19 comments)
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humor: Listen to your Realtor - 12/22/06 09:43 PM
This young lady lost out on a property because she didn't listen to her Realtor... Don't let this happen to you!
Photo celebrity.rightpundits.com
… (0 comments)
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humor: Anatomy of Rural Land Sale. A Good-Natured Look at a Real Challenge. Part 2 - 12/22/06 01:04 PM
On November 14th I wrote about an exciting scenario: RURAL LAND SALE Cash Deal with Contingencies. 35+ AC in beautiful (see photo) Madison County, North Carolina, about 30 minutes north of Asheville , NC.
I expressed concern that the parties to the transaction wanted/neededto close in 60 days, max. and that due diligence … (13 comments)
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humor: Tongue In Cheek, Absurd In Hand, Your Loan Officer & You..... - 12/22/06 10:43 AM
In any industry, the question begs the answer. What makes him/her good at what they do? What makes a good mechanic, doctor, bartender, secretary, plumber, insurance agent, stock broker, professional roller derby referree, etc, etc, etc? For this forum, this less than insightful and totally ridiculous blog, I will focus on … (4 comments)
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humor: Cage Match! - 12/21/06 02:46 PM
Okay,
The Donald vs Rosie
Are we obligated as Realtors to take Trump?
… (7 comments)
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humor: Reflections from my Back Porch on a Warm Thursday Morning - 12/21/06 05:27 AM
I can see the clouds approaching from the south, more ominous in the pre-dawn sky than what they actually represent. The main storm that hit Denver yesterday seems to be passing to the south of us. We remain unseasonably warm, and any snow we receive in the next couple of … (4 comments)
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humor: It Came BACK! Oh, the Horror.... (or - More Help For New Mortgage Brokers) - 12/21/06 04:32 AM
A few weeks ago I wrote a post about some tips for new Mortgage Broker's and Loan Officers.
In it I talked about a guy who came into Internet Realty Brokers to pitch his mortgage company. He was exactly the type of salesman that makes me CRINGE!
Well, yesterday he came baaaaacccccckkkkk.
… (17 comments)
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humor: The Golf Tournament of the Year!!!! - 12/19/06 06:06 AM
That's right! It's finally upon us.......
Sports fans have been eagerly awaiting it-
Women from all around the state (well, at least Chris) will be there begging for autographs-
Local homeowners are boarding up their homes and buying extra insurance....
It's The Annual Marc vs Jason Golf Tournament! This Friday at a … (29 comments)
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humor: reliable stumpers - 12/18/06 02:59 PM
Have you ever noticed that clients sometimes ask you all kinds of questions NOT about the property they want to list or about the property in which they want to invest, but about subjects librarians love to answer? This past month, I have been asked at least 10 questions that had … (12 comments)
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humor: Cats and Dogs Living Together! Mass Hysteria! - 12/18/06 08:59 AM
Good grief! What is it with the ActiveRainers? This meme'ing bit is viral and terribly funny! Who'd have thunk that Uber AR persona Maureen Francis was a former millionaire Peace Corps model? Or did I read that incorrectly?!
Since she and former colleague Missy Caulk kindly tagged myself, a fellow SE Michigander, I … (2 comments)
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humor: AR Comedy Club - Week 2 - Featured Posts - 12/17/06 09:45 PM
Well, I have to say that things have been pretty busy on my end to keep up with all the great posts that have been on AR, lately. So, with that said, I have secretly apointed a couple moderators to help me monitor this group. Those moderators will help me decide who … (12 comments)
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humor: You've GOT to be Kidding - Week 3 - Featured Post - 12/17/06 06:01 PM
OK - I know I said I wouldn't feature myself, but my Officially Official Group Moderators:
Mr. Mom - Jason Price, aided by Madison andChris "The Cowgirl"both said 'No Marc - Feature one of your posts!' - I tried to hold back, but they insisted. I'll let them both know later.........
So without further ado … (7 comments)
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humor: So I got MEME-d, fuggedabboudit! - 12/17/06 05:44 PM
Earlier today, a lovely young woman asked me to share some little known facts about myself. At first I wasn't going to....
But then Chris asked me too, so I had no choice!
OK here's 5:
I started college a year early, then spent 7 years getting my first degree - hey, why rush?! … (13 comments)
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humor: Buyers are Liars! ( Sellers too) LOL - 12/16/06 11:21 AM
My buyer told me that he lived in the same house for 10 years. When I checked, I found out he'd still be theretoday if the Governor hadn't pardoned him.Why do you have your front door leading right into the dining room? So my relatives won't have to waste anytime.The sellers … (2 comments)
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humor: Old Men & Coffee Shops: Continued Blatant Trolling for Comments on a Saturday Morning - 12/16/06 07:05 AM
Good Morning to you all, Gentle Readers! Medford and I have been working on our marketing plan for the codgers. Today we will give you an idea of what the regular crew of codgers look like—at least in caricature.
Top Row: Jay Merton & Medford Ambrose (both re-drawn).
Bottom Row: … (21 comments)
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humor: Christmas Eve Closing - A Holiday Story - 12/15/06 01:02 PM
'Twas an hour before closing and the agents were tense, To close Christmas Eve just didn't make sense. But the seller was booked on the 6 o'clock flight And had warned "THERE WILL BE A CLOSING TONIGHT!" The agents agreed…because business was dead, And visions of commission … (5 comments)
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humor: Old Men & Coffee Shops: Blatant Trolling for Comments or Active Rain Blog Marketing ? - 12/15/06 05:08 AM
I didn’t linger long on my back porch this morning as the boys were assembling early at the café today for our daily meeting. It seems they actually read our posts, and have some concerns about the blog.
“What is all this?” asked Harold the retired barber as I sat … (11 comments)
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humor: Keys to Moving up in the company - 12/14/06 04:55 PM
1. Never walk down the hall without a document in your hands. People with documents in their hands look like hardworking employees heading for important meetings. People with nothingin their hands look like they're heading for the cafeteria. People with the newspaper in their hands look like they're heading for the … (6 comments)
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humor: Top 8 excuses to get out of work - 12/14/06 04:53 PM
I won't be coming to work today because:______________________1. If it's all the same to you, I won't be coming in to work. The voices told me to clean all the guns today. 2. On Saturday, I set half the clocks in my house ahead an hour and the other half back … (3 comments)
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humor: Murphy's law of the work place - 12/14/06 04:50 PM
Murphy's law of the work place.......LOL......
If you can't get your work done in the first 24 hours, work nights.A pat on the back is only a few centimeters from a kick in the butt.Don't be irreplaceable. If you can't be replaced, you can't be promoted.It doesn't matter what you do. It … (0 comments)
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humor: Casual Fridays? LOL - 12/14/06 04:49 PM
Casual Fridays?
Week 1 - Memo No. 1Effective this week, the company is adopting Fridays as Casual Day. Employees are free to dress in the casual attire of their choice.Week 3 - Memo No. 2Spandex and leather micro-miniskirts are not appropriate attire for Casual Day. Neither are string ties, rodeo belt buckles … (2 comments)
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humor: History of Real Estate Agents LOL - 12/14/06 04:43 PM
A Brief History Of Real Estate Agents 6 MILLION BC: God searches for a planet to establish life. Encounters real estate agent from "Lucifer's Planets & Gardens" who says "I've got a great deal on a fixer-upper just 90 million miles from the Sun." 5.9 MILLION BC: God buys the … (2 comments)
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humor: dialogue with a potential buyer - 12/14/06 10:46 AM
In this business you experience some eye raising moments, either by phone or in person and sometimes its hard to keep a straight face. I had a conversation with a rather eccentric client a few weeks ago and it went something like this.The first time I called things went almost normally.
" hello this … (3 comments)
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humor: From my Back Porch: Where should Medford and I duck Winter in February? (a comment carnival) - 12/14/06 05:34 AM
Again this morning the temperature is hovering around the freezing mark, and it’s raining. This could cause some serious traffic problems during this morning’s rush. More importantly, to this codger anyway, it could cause some senior-sidewalk-slippage problems as I make my way to the morning meeting at the café!
This … (24 comments)
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humor: Christmas Holiday Fun - 12/13/06 10:34 PM
Here are fun quizzes and games for the holiday season. Some are ideal for handing out and doing as a group activity, others are online and played interactively. Christmas Song Picture Game (Answers) Christmas Song Quiz II (Answers)Christmas Song Quiz III (Answers) Guess The Christmas Song Quiz (Answers) BowTie Christmas Quizzes … (1 comments)
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humor: I finally passed the human test - 12/13/06 09:37 PM
I always forget to add the FRUIT/password that is at the bottom of the screen (when starting a new blog).
The screen displayed went something like this...You haven't passed the human test, please enter the password located at the bottom of the screen.
Oh my goodness, I havent passed the human test...I was … (8 comments)
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humor: Tuesday Reflections from my Back Porch—What happened to “REALTOR®” Teresa’s Face? - 12/12/06 05:21 AM
A warm (39ºF), foggy, North Star State morning greeted me today as I stepped out on to the porch. I can linger a bit, and savor the warmth of my (china, not stoneware) mug of Kona blend coffee (I purchased a whole 1# bag, so I will have it for … (25 comments)
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humor: Thanks for all the emails of 2006: - 12/12/06 01:36 AM
I must send my thanks to whomever sent me the one about rat poop in the glue on envelopes because I now have to use a wet towel with every envelope that needs sealing.Also, now I have to scrub the top of every can I open for the same reason.I no … (3 comments)
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humor: The NEW Loan......... - 12/11/06 03:57 PM
While I was in the gym this morning-
(Better intro than - So I'm on line at the bank.....)
Someone came up to me and asked if I still did mortgages.
ME: Sure - what can I do for you?
HIM: I'm going to need a loan for a new house.
OK, have you found a place yet....?
… (41 comments)
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humor: Reflections from my Back Porch, Monday, 11 Dec ‘06 - 12/11/06 04:17 AM
(If you’re in the neighborhood, c’mon around to the back & say hello (be careful of the squeaky gate—my “Medford alert”), coffee’s hot and fresh, just to your left, inside the door.)
It’s another fine morning here on my back porch with my (china, not stoneware) mug of Kona blend … (4 comments)
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humor: Taking Care of Mom - 12/10/06 11:26 PM
A widow had worked hard, sacrificing every comfort to raise her three sons and send them to college. Each of them had graduated with advanced degrees and went on to become very wealthy. One day, the three sons met to discuss their mother’s welfare. They had been looking after her, but … (0 comments)
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humor: Reflections from my Back Porch, Sunday, 10 Dec ‘06, a Fine Morning! - 12/10/06 05:22 AM
Don’t look for me here—go on around to the back!
I am savoring my (china, not stoneware) mug of organically & shade grown, fair trade, French roast, coffee this fine Saint Paul morning on my back porch—the temperature under a clear & star-filled sky is 32ºF, with no wind—so I can linger … (12 comments)
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humor: I can’t hold it any longer… this old Blog-Dog is gonna hit his 100th Post. - 12/08/06 09:25 AM
Well I am about to a hit a personal milestone here in the rain. My next post will be #100!
And while that may not seem like a lot for some bloggers here in the rain... it is for me. You see prior to joining Active Rain I barely knew what … (33 comments)
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humor: Reflections from my Back Porch, Friday, 8 Dec ’06 - 12/08/06 05:35 AM
It’s a balmy 11ºF with almost no wind, allowing me to remain on the porch with my (china, not stoneware) mug of (organically & shade grown, fair trade, Guatemalan roast) coffee warming my hands, and helping my brain fire on all synapses.
Daisy did not spend the night here last … (10 comments)
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humor: Dog Napping! - 12/07/06 01:11 AM
Dog Napping! The sound of these words brings me to attention. How horrible, why would anyone want to steal a dog?
But there is a twist as the English Language always makes one stop and think, what does she mean?
Look at the photo, it's a dog napping. No one took the dog, … (11 comments)
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humor: Oh how I love the changes in the seasons - PART 1 WINTER - 12/06/06 09:48 AM
Yesterday it was rather cold and I started day dreaming about the winter season.
When I first came to the US it was in the winter time and I didn't think I would make it. At the time I also did not believe in being practical, who needed those heavy coats, and … (2 comments)
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humor: Modern Birds and Bees - 12/05/06 04:29 PM
OK guys - this has absolutely no relevance to Real Estate - but had to share it with you. It is the modern version of the Birds and The Bees.
A little boy goes to his father and asks "Daddy, how was I born?"
The father answers: "Well son, I guess one day you … (26 comments)
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humor: Computer Joke - 12/05/06 12:56 PM
… (1 comments)
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humor: Points to Ponder for Those Who Take Life Too Seriously! - 12/04/06 07:58 PM
1. SAVE THE WHALES. COLLECT THE WHOLE SET. 2. A DAY WITHOUT SUNSHINE IS LIKE, NIGHT. 3. ON THE OTHER HAND, YOU HAVE DIFFERENT FINGERS. 4. I JUST GOT LOST IN THOUGHT. IT WAS UNFAMILIAR TERRITORY. 5. I FEEL LIKE I'M DIAGONALLY PARKED IN A PARALLEL UNIVERSE. 6. HONK IF YOU LOVE PEACE AND QUIET. 7. HE … (4 comments)
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humor: Cukoo Clock - 12/03/06 03:00 PM
… (6 comments)
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humor: Sunday Stuff - 12/03/06 11:10 AM
This is our "Cyber Cafe" banner all dressed up for the Christmans Holidays. This one I didn't have to build from scratch.
Yesterday, in our post: “We Can’t Help Ourselves—Today’s BAD Joke,” in our last comment we posed a bit of a puzzle for any subsequent reader/commenter: “Take a good look … (0 comments)
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