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LOL FRIDAY: Stock Market Terms

By Mirela Monte

Real Estate Broker/Owner with Buyers' Choice Realty

April 09, 2009 03:03 PM

CEO -Chief Embezzlement Officer.

CFO- Corporate Fraud Officer.

BULL MARKET - A random market movement causing an investor to mistake himself for a financial genius.

BEAR MARKET - A 6 to 18 month period when the kids get no allowance, the wife gets no jewelry, and the husband gets no sex.

VALUE INVESTING - The art of buying low and selling lower.

P/E RATIO - The percentage of investors wetting their pants as the market keeps crashing.

BROKER - What my broker has made me.

STANDARD & POOR - Your life in a nutshell.

STOCK ANALYST - Idiot who just downgraded your stock.

STOCK SPLIT - When your ex-wife and her lawyer split your assets equally between themselves.

FINANCIAL PLANNER - A guy whose phone has been disconnected.

MARKET CORRECTION - The day after you buy stocks.

CASH FLOW- The movement your money makes as it disappears down the toilet.

YAHOO - What you yell after selling it to some poor sucker for $240 per share.

WINDOWS - What you jump out of when you're the sucker who bought Yahoo @ $240 per share.

INSTITUTIONAL INVESTOR - Past year investor who's now locked up in a nuthouse.

PROFIT - An archaic word no longer in use.

It's LOL FRIDAY on The Optimist Group. Come join us and post something funny!

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Mirela Monte

Buyers' Choice Realty - North Myrtle Beach, SC

Myrtle Beach Real Estate

Hannah: It's 11pm here and I have to go to bed early. Tomorrow will be another brutal day. I'm getting my laughs in early...

Frank & Sharon: I'm glad you like them! Thank you!

Apr 09, 2009 03:29 PM

Mirela Monte

Buyers' Choice Realty - North Myrtle Beach, SC

Myrtle Beach Real Estate

Steve: It hurts? Tell me about it!

Apr 09, 2009 03:30 PM

Brian Brumpton

Keller Williams Boise - Boise, ID

Boise Idaho Real Estate

I like the definition of a bull market. Everyone is a genius when the market is up.

Apr 09, 2009 03:31 PM

Bo Hussung

Bell Title /Triserv LLC - Nashvle, TN

Mirela, I am rooling the floor and laughing. Thanks, I needed that

You are the best

Apr 09, 2009 04:20 PM

Heather Chavez

Second Self Virtual Assistance - Caldwell, ID

Real Estate Virtual, Assistant (928) 692-3235

That's great, Mirela. "Broker" and "Standard & Poor": that's about it!

Apr 09, 2009 04:56 PM

Tony & Darcy Cannon

Aubrey and Associates Realty - Layton, UT

The C Team

Mirela, LOL! That is too funny, thanks for posting it.

Apr 09, 2009 07:03 PM

Randall Sandin

Carolina One Real Estate - Charleston, SC

843-209-9667 - Search for Charleston SC Real Estate

great Friday morning laughs - thanks

Apr 09, 2009 09:53 PM

Caren Wallace

Premier Property Group LLC - Tualatin, OR

Portland Caren Real Estate

Mirela, These little snippets are very funny and the last one is so true.....profit is an archaic word!

Apr 09, 2009 11:24 PM

Tom Boos

Sine & Monaghan Realtors, Real Living - Grosse Pointe Farms, MI

Providing the very best of service to Sellers and

It would be a lot funnier if it weren't SO TRUE.

Apr 10, 2009 01:42 AM

Joseph D. Federico

MVP Realty - Naples, FL

Southwest Florida Homes with Joe Federico

Mirela-Thanks for starting my Friday with a good laugh.

Apr 10, 2009 01:42 AM

C. Bartch

Newark, OH

Hi Mirela, Spot on...these are so true. Thanks for the Friday laugh.

Apr 10, 2009 02:17 AM

Robert Rauf

CMG Home Loans - Toms River, NJ

Mirela, I have been in a Bear Market for entirely TOOOO LONG! Thanks for the Funny! I did my duty and put up a few for Friday Fun, Now it is time to get my taxes fun.. (OH JOY!)

Apr 10, 2009 02:45 AM

Kathleen Ann Pacheco-Corbett

(FIRST Exclusive Buyer's Office Providence-RI) - Providence, RI

Realtor, RI-MA, CEBA, Master, e-Pro, ABR, ABRM, GR

Mirela, What a great list of stock market terms. Thanks for started my Friday with some laughs, Have a great Easter weekend,

Happy Easter

Apr 10, 2009 05:41 AM

Tom Ski

BeFirst Media Group - Lakeside, MT

Social Media Marketing, Online Radio

very insite full. the truth in sheep clothing or wording. :-)

Apr 10, 2009 05:57 AM

Lara O'Keefe

North Texas Home Finders - McKinney, TX

Mirela, I loved "bear Market!" Thanks for the Friday chuckle. I'll keep my eye out for something funny for next week ;-)

Apr 10, 2009 01:18 PM

Ron Bridges

ERA Wilder Realty, Inc. - Sumter, SC

Thanks for the laughs Mirela. Like Lara, I really liked the bear market. LOL

Apr 10, 2009 03:49 PM

Maria Morton

Platinum Realty - Kansas City, MO

Kansas City Real Estate 816-560-3758

Mirella, my favorite definition is Cash Flow - right down the toilet! LOL

Apr 11, 2009 07:25 PM

Sandy Childs

Keller Williams Realty - Spartanburg, SC

Realtor - Spartanburg, SC

I don't know which one is my favorite, I'm going to reblog this over to the KW agents so they can have a good belly laugh too. Thanks for sharing.

Apr 14, 2009 07:08 AM

Gene Wunderlich

1st Action Real Estate - Murrieta, CA

Realtor & Legislative Liaison

Awright Mirela - turnabout is only fair. I've got to reblog this. Too funny.

Apr 16, 2009 12:02 PM

Susan Neal

RE/MAX Gold, Fair Oaks - Fair Oaks, CA

Fair Oaks CA & Sacramento Area Real Estate Broker

Hi Mirela - This is truly funny. I saw it over on Russel Ray's blog (he reblogged it from you), and enjoyed it, so I thought I'd come over and thank you directly for the good laugh.

Apr 16, 2009 03:52 PM

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LOL FRIDAY: Stock Market Terms

CEO -Chief Embezzlement Officer.

CFO- Corporate Fraud Officer.

BULL MARKET - A random market movement causing an investor to mistake himself for a financial genius.

BEAR MARKET - A 6 to 18 month period when the kids get no allowance, the wife gets no jewelry, and the husband gets no sex.

VALUE INVESTING - The art of buying low and selling lower.

P/E RATIO - The percentage of investors wetting their pants as the market keeps crashing.

BROKER - What my broker has made me.

STANDARD & POOR - Your life in a nutshell.

STOCK ANALYST - Idiot who just downgraded your stock.

STOCK SPLIT - When your ex-wife and her lawyer split your assets equally between themselves.

FINANCIAL PLANNER - A guy whose phone has been disconnected.

MARKET CORRECTION - The day after you buy stocks.

CASH FLOW- The movement your money makes as it disappears down the toilet.

YAHOO - What you yell after selling it to some poor sucker for $240 per share.

WINDOWS - What you jump out of when you're the sucker who bought Yahoo @ $240 per share.

INSTITUTIONAL INVESTOR - Past year investor who's now locked up in a nuthouse.

PROFIT - An archaic word no longer in use.

It's LOL FRIDAY on The Optimist Group. Come join us and post something funny!

Comments(24)

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