"Mismatched" Spouses - Introverts & Extroverts

Here is what I learned. I worked with a guy named Tony. The way he sold was so opposite of the way i worked . I would not buy anything from him. Yet both of us were very very sucessful. He even more than me. So what I learned was embrace different techniques and if SWS is not your cup of tea so what if it works.

Hey passion and service will lead to awesomely great sales.  Thanks J.

Hmmm, I usually tell my husband that I don't tell him how to do his job, and I'd appreciate it if he didn't tell me how to do mine.  Probably not the most conducive to solving the problem :)

One should adjust to the customer.  If they are an introvert... you be quiet.  If they are chatty - you better get to talking.  People like people that are like them.  You can't wait to only deal with people like you - change to be like them.  Sure its like acting, but then you are selling.  You will always be you in your heart, but you should relate to people in the manner in which they communicate.

Hi Jennifer, Good post. Thanks for sharing.

Best - Sash

Grat insights, as always, Jennifer. Now I need to take a critical look at my strengths and apply them...

Jennifer- I think you are so right.  Right now, I am seeing this in my office to a big extreme.  Extroverted broker and introverted agents.  The broker is "challenging" the interoverts to step out of their comfort zones and knock on doors.  So far the agents have done this but it has only worked for a few of the agents as far as getting results.  I am not on the hot seat so to speak for a couple of reasons, one of those being that I have proof that my farming and blogging are bringing me business.  I hear about the frustration all the time from the agents though.

There are more differences than just introverts and extroverts. I'm extro and hubby is intro. BUT, once he warms up to you, he's your buddy for life, while I'm not very interested in friendships. As far as I'm concerned, we balance each other out nicely. The clingy clients that want a buddy after the fact get pushed off onto him. lol. I can't stand it.

What works for some will not work for all!  we all need to carve out our own style and our own pieces of any sales business! 

PS: got your email, Just had a crazy day and will get on it for you!

Jennifer - When I was a Sales Manager back in the day in the computer business, I always told my sales people that there were as many different ways to succeed in sales as there are people. I tried to help them find their own way. It's always better to have a variety of people and styles in an office!

As to living with a salesman? I tried that 25 years ago and he would always start with "What you should have ...." Well, what I did was leave him! Even extroverts have their own style.

Extroverts get out there and meet lots of people, but not all of those people like to deal with extroverts; that's where us introverts have the advantage. 

Got the 6th on my calendar for your teleseminar.  Can't wait. 

I am shocked that a broker wont let some one do it "their way"  maybe they should ask for a salary!!! after all, they are independant contractors, are they not? 

Hi Jennifer... great stuff!!  Two quick thoughts....

SWS is the way to go, but there are those that use it as an excuse to not work hard... and yet they still expect business to just find them.  Then they blame the concept of SWS instead of their lack of effort and discipline.

Anyone that insists their way is the only right and successful way has control issues, whether they know it or not.  They may be nice, well-intentioned folks but seem to also limit themselves without knowing it.  Getting an answer right does not mean you know all the answers or your answers are the only answers.  Thank goodness!

Peace!  G

 Me and my husband are introverts. Although he usually is more organized, and able to "get er done". I'm better at deciding what needs to get done, and he is better at getting it done.  We work well like that. It's good to play off of each others strengths. In this case the husband may be pushing a little too much.  

Men ARE from Mars, you know...and when presented with a "problem," they want to fix it!  God bless 'em for that trait, but sometimes their idea of a fix is not the idea we need. 

This hubby reminds me of all those cold callin' and door knockin' agents who like to say, "get out of your comfort zone.  Just do it!"  LOL

In the case you cited, though, is the problem that "NH" has not yet been successful, thus leading dear hubby to think her approach isn't working?  Perhaps he is right she isn't doing what she needs to do in order to be successful, but perhaps he isn't right in saying it is in her approach.  I cannot help but think if she were successful, they would not even be having the conversation.  So, maybe there is a problem, just not the problem she thinks.  ;-)

I get similar comments from my husband...but he's more introverted than I am! We'd both rather sit home than go to a party with a ton of people, but we're also pretty chatty when around people we're comfortable with. It's very hard to define one way or the other.

I'm an introvert married to a complete extrovert, so I understand this so well.  After 19 years together, we have learned to understand our differences.  It just takes time and a little education on the part of each spouse.  I learned to be honest and frank with my husband about what works for me when he would give me advice like this.  There is no cookie cutter approach to anything in life.

Sorry I missed commenting on your post, it's very interesting. Myself, I am a Gemini so I am introvert & extrovert, it just depends on my mood!

Vegas Bob

I'm like Vegas Bob in that I'm both a Gemini and an introvert and extrovert but am much more comfortable as an introvert. My personality is more nurturing, helpful caring than a "hey look at me" type. I have gone up to strangers looking at real estate books and handing them my card and questioning them as to whether they are "lookers" or "buyers" and telling them to contact me when they are ready or if they have any questions. I'll steer them to my website, also. The times I do that, my extroverted husband calls me "The Hawk". He means that nicely but I really don't like it. I don't want to be perceived that way. Anyway, we always talk about it and the end result is I let him be the extrovert and he can get me as many leads as he wants to. I'll continue to stay true to myself and get my leads my way. It works and I get double the leads!