As the rest of America celebrates her birthday, I - as an immigrant to this country celebrates too. Though I am not a US citizen yet, my dreams of someday being able to call myself an American will soon realize (perhaps sometime next year). I really want to share with you this incomplete journey and why some people (like me) would leave their birth country, start over in a foreign culture and what the symbol of freedom means to the rest of the world.

Many of you know that I come from Malaysia - a small country shaped very similar like Florida located on the equator between Thailand and Singapore. Born and bred in Malaysia most of my life, I came over to America to finish college. Something I have always wanted to do since I was a little girl. However, my first three months of my American experience was nothing like I imagined. A 20-year young lady dreamt about a life very much like Beverly Hills 90210, I found myself in Norman, Oklahoma (University of Oklahoma) where I didn't have any cool to write home about.

Most of my friends who are curious would ask, "Why Oklahoma?" and I bet you must wondered that too. Back in Malaysia, I had completed some credit hours in a local junior college. Oklahoma accepted all of my 48 credit hours, so naturally I would go there. Plus, when I compared Oklahoma to Texas to California, Oklahoma was the cheapest at $15,000 per year (I pay International school fees - which is about 3 or 4 times the rate of residents). It was not the coolest experience - with no bikini tops and Mustangs to drive.

Back in my home country, I am a minority (Malaysian of Chinese descent). The Malaysian higher education favors the majority. About 90% of the school entrance quotas are given to the "Malays" - the people of the land. In order to enter medical school, a minority has to score an almost complete score to enter while the Malays could enter with a much less requirement. For some minorities who are not as smart, even if I make it into one of the local universities, I will probably study the 3rd or 4th of my choice - perhaps a History or education major. Who knows. Knowing that, my father - like many of my Malaysian friends, sent me to the US to graduate in the field of my choice.

I found myself driving an old Toyota Tercel that we need to make lots of prayers for before we head anywhere. Towards the end of its life, I wouldn't get it to go more than 20 minutes at a time before the radiator would go up. I would dig up scratch paper from the computer labs to take home to use as my notepad, and I once picked up a mattress from a dumpster to sleep on. I did all these because I understood how hard my family had to save in order to put me through school. Looking back, those were some humble beginnings but they weren't too funny back then.

I graduated with a Civil Engineering degree in 1998. I worked as a Structural Engineering assistant 2 weeks after I graduated. When I graduated, my father didn't speak to me for over 3 months. The original plans were to finish school as soon as possible, then go back home. We are a tight family so the 3 years I spent in Oklahoma was difficult for my family (I was a daddy's girl).

There were several reasons why I didn't go home despite my father's desire for me to do so. 1) The life I slowly built for myself was working out for me. At a small engineering salary, I could stand on my own two feet with no financial help from my family back home. My fiancée and I combined made a good salary. To date, we have never asked for money from back home. We pride ourselves with that. In America, we don't have to be rich in order to have a good life. Sometimes, I only wished my American friends know that. Did you know that if I had gone home, I'd probably have to move back home with my family because rents are very high when compared to my salary? Talking about wages, back then, the starting salary of a fresh graduate is about $1,200 per month? Did you know that a car payment sometimes is as high as $500 - $700 per month? And that's not driving a Meserati or a Bentley? That's just driving our local cars - not much better than a Kia or Hyundai here.

2) The standard of living in America is definitely much affordable here than in Malaysia. Most couples work and send their children to daycares and many send them to overnight daycares from Sunday through Friday. The only time parents see their children is on a Saturday evening. Work hours can be long in Malaysia - from 9am until 8 or 9pm for those who are seeking a career. For them, there is no point in getting their children that late in the night, so many of them leave them with their nannies' homes or at grandparent's homes. Most couples don't see their children except for 1 day a week. I think that thought would make me sick enough but yet, please understand that these families are just trying to make ends meet, build a significant savings for college education so that they can have a "brighter" future - like the road I walked.

3) A Honda Accord cost over $100,000, a BMW 7-series cost over $700,000 and a Lexus RX 330 cost over $350,000. Just mind you, a "normal" typical Malaysian may earn $3,000 - $5,000 per month. Yet, you see these cars all over the city.

4) The quality of life is definitely different. Here in America, family time is important. Back home, when you don't make enough, the last thing you do with your time is spending it with the America.

5) There is no freedom of speech in Malaysia even though we are a democratic country. This is the Malaysian way of controlling peace and in many ways, I can definitely agree with that.

I'm sharing the stories of my home front with you, America to share with you how lucky you are to be in America - for all the great things you have but often taken for granted. I hope as America celebrates her birthday, that you too - will take part in your local fun and activities and remember the stories I have shared with you. Many people in the rest of the world want what you have and hear you are, not realizing what a jewel you have.

No one is perfect - including President Obama and the congress. But I can tell you that if you have to find yourself in another country, you will be glad you are an American. Make your country proud. Stand along with the rest of the immigrants, build a strong front and be the greatest country where the world will look up to.

I constantly see posts about rants about taxes, tea parties here and there, about how banks are stupid in handling short sales, how healthcare socialization is silly, how wrong it was for Bush to send her son to Iraq and how he wrongfully died, how people are just never right.

Edited to Add:

Civil liberities - Enjoy it ALL because you can. I wrote tea parties and lower taxes but I didn't want the rest to misunderstand that I was "targeting" at you if you did all those things. One of the beauties of this great nation is that we can do ALL that and by sharing your opinions in tea parties, in peaceful marches and protests are rights that a Malaysian in her home country would never be able to do. We cannot write or say "bad" things about the country for the sake of keeping peace.

But because I live here, I too can enjoy the Land of the Free with the rest of my American friends. I can go to protests, I can do almost anything an American can, I can work hard and my future is bright.

I'm not talking about politics today but I'm really telling you if you really know what it is like to live in the LAND of the FREE and how you exercise your FREEDOM, you will be more appreciative of what others don't have. 

Happy Birthday, America!

 

 

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Let A Non-American Tell You What It Means To Be American. A 4th Story from My Home Front.

 
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19 Comments on Let A Non-American Tell You What It Means To Be American. A 4th Story from My Home Front

JUL
03
574,564 Points 59 Featured Posts Outside Blog

Great perspective Loreena for all of us Americans who were born here and I love learning more about your background too. You are truly living the American dream with your Oklahoma, Texas, and family parts that you have created here for yourself. Happy Independence Day. Let none of us ever take our freedom for granted.

11:23am • #1
183,663 Points 12 Featured Posts Outside Blog

That is so sad about work/family time. I'd live in a 1 bedroom house with my wife and 3 kids before I worked that much. BUT AT LEAST I would have that option. I appreciate your sharing. Humbling for me to read. We always need such perspective. Happy fourth to you. Your perspective alone has made you an outstanding U.S. Citizen.

11:54am • #2
109,000 Points 3 Featured Posts Localism Sponsor

Very well said Loreena! The best to you and your family as you celebrate this 4th of July!

12:02pm • #3
464,262 Points 50 Featured Posts Outside Blog

Gary - Thanks for enjoying the stories I tell. Thanks for supporting me through the years and thanks for taking the time to give me the acknowledgement I so seek.

Steve - That's what I feel too, but then again, if you are from that culture, you would think it's completely normal. Did you know that Asians think that Americans are lazy because we shut down at 5pm?

12:04pm • #4
279,638 Points 4 Featured Posts Localism Sponsor Outside Blog

Just think of the freedom that a place active rain represents to so many who for maybe the first time sit in their in lving room andread a blog that may speak out against government policy ..that what makes the 4th so important

12:12pm • #5
105,655 Points 2 Featured Posts Localism Sponsor

Sometimes it takes us homegrowns to move away from North America to appreciate our freedoms. I came back to Canada after 10 years overseas and I am THRILLED to be back home!!!   Thank your Loreena for sharing your story with us and helping remind us of an attitude of gratitude! 

12:19pm • #6

Loreena, that was great insight for all natural citizens here.  Americans considering moving abroad to find an idyllic life elsewhere are usually humbled by the loss of freedoms they once had but failed to recognize.  Thanks for sharing your perspective here. 

12:44pm • #7

Thank you Loreena for your post.  I came to US in 1994 and got my citizenship in 2001.  There are many opportunities in US as long as you are a hardworker.  It is not easy to compete as a minority but I admire your detemination to achieve your goals.  You will be very successful. 

I miss my country but I am proud to be an American.  I am glad that I took the opportunity to come to America.  You will get your citizenship next year therefore enjoy all the opportunities and wish you all the good and best!

 

Jenny Alston

 

1:11pm • #8
148,626 Points Outside Blog

Your are absolutely correct.  I have an older friend who was imprisoned under Castro Cuba in the 60s.  He now lives in Arizona and appreciates every day, even though they do not have much materially.

Your Queen Creek AZ Real Estate Specialist

1:15pm • #9
109,182 Points

Great perspective Loreena. I am a second generation American and along with my father and my brother am a veteran. I have a large extended family with 35 first cousins alone and many of them have emigrated to this country through the sponsorship of my parents. They complain on how bad we are, etc, all along enjoying cars, education for their kids, new homes, etc. Non of which would be available to them had they stayed on the farm in the old country. Better to be a poor working person in this country than a middle class person any where else in the world. Happy Birthday America, and be ready because Loreena will be one of us down the road.

1:25pm • #10

Loreena,

You mentioned a couple things that stood out for me. How Americans are spoiled and we take things for granted. So spot on and I applaud your forthrightness.

Although I was born in in Scranton Pennsylvania the grandson of a coal miner, you would never know it by looking at my face, eating my food, or attending family gatherings. I am a 48 year old half Korean half Caucasian who loves to hunt fish and honor my Korean heritage. Growing up in America during the height of the Vietnam war presented it's own challenges but I witnessed first hand how my mothers entire family through sponsorship by my military father got to experience the American dream, the one I lived daily. Good post Loreena.

Gene

1:25pm • #11

About a month ago, my dad was telling me a story of his childhood.  He is from the Philippines and when he was a kid, there weren't enough jobs, so his dad went to Guam to work at the US Air Force base there and he would send every penny he made back to the Philippines.  His mom would feed and clothe all 7 kids and would save everything else.  After 7 years they saved enough money to bring the entire family to Guam to be together.  He hadn't seen his dad in 7 years!  I couldn't imagine being away from my kids for so long, but here it is someone I've known all my life but never knew that story.

So because of that sacrifice by my Grandfather, I'm here today, a Born American and I appreciate everything that being an American means.  I'm in awe just thinking about all of the people that have sacrificed something in the past to make this country what it is today.

Thanks Loreena for your post, it makes me appreciate more what I have and where we live!

Happy 4th of July Everyone!!!  Stay safe.

2:15pm • #13
Localism Sponsor Outside Blog

You are now officially my favorite Malayasian immigrant!!! When you wrote: No one is perfect - including President Obama and the congress. But I can tell you that if you have to find yourself in another country, you will be glad you are an American. Make your country proud.--- You are a better citizen of this country than a large percentage of those born here with no appreciation for what they have inherited.  Thanks for reminding us how lucky we are to live here!!!

3:49pm • #14

Nice post.  Too often we take this country for granted.  While we have to maintain political vigilence to protect our freedoms, it is good to be reminded how lucky we are to be in America.

4:55pm • #15
145,769 Points 2 Featured Posts Localism Sponsor Outside Blog Hit Router

Loreena, I lived in Italy for 3 years and know what it's like to be in a foreign country. As much as I enjoyed it, I was happy to move back HOME. You're right, we are very lucky here. Very nice Independence day post!

5:12pm • #16
3 Featured Posts Outside Blog

Always a pleasure to read your posts!  An amazing perspective from an amazing person.  You WILL be an official American some day but in our hearts you are one already!

8:23pm • #17
405,312 Points 17 Featured Posts Outside Blog

I never knew anything about International School fees. And the conditions you described sound deplorable. I don't know why there isn't a mass-exodus. Thanks for sharing your experiences.

11:46pm • #18
JUL
04
558,378 Points 95 Featured Posts Localism Sponsor Outside Blog Hit Router

Loreena, thanks for sharing your story. Amazing really...

You said Malaysia is a democratic society but doesn't allow free speech. How is that possibably democratic? That is scary to me. God help us if we ever don't allow free speech in this country, one of the foundation principals we live by.

Happy 4th of July.

8:18am • #19
JUL
05
Outside Blog

Thank you for sharing this.  I and all those around me are so spoiled and we take so much for granted.  When I am feeling sad, this is a post I need to visit and revisit!

10:41pm • #20

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