Financial Tips for Couples Who Need to Talk

Tough economic times can cause a major strain on your marriage. And while we all know that communication is often the key to overcoming this challenge, discussing finances with a spouse can be extremely difficult for many people. With this in mind, here are some tips to at least get the conversation started.

Get Out of the House - One of the worst times to discuss finances with your significant other is just after you've paid the bills. Let's face it, there's something about writing all of those checks that suddenly makes the reality of your monthly finances sink in. So, instead of approaching your spouse with statements in hand, try waiting a few hours. Think about what you want to say and how you want to say it. Then invite your partner for a walk or a cup of coffee at a local coffee house. The key here is a change of environment, a relaxed, neutral place where your partner won't feel like he or she is being attacked.

Give Your Partner Some Credit - If starting the conversation is hard for you, try opening with a story about your parents' attitude and behavior towards money. This will provide an opportunity for your partner to do the same, opening the door for the discussion. Experts suggest starting off with an example of your own shortcomings and how you hope to change it. Also, offering a compliment of what he or she has been doing right is a great way to break the ice.

Never Assume - Your goal here is to establish a common ground, to create and quantify a plan of action that will benefit you both, even a small goal that you both can work toward as a team. Because of this, you really can't assume that your values and beliefs are absolutely correct and flawless. Be respectful and humble and listen to what your partner has to say. Most importantly, don't blame.

Bring in an Expert - Take the conversation to the next level. Once you've established a general plan, talking to a financial planner together can serve not only to ease the tension, but to solidify your common goals. Either way, keep talking, keep trying, and avoid bickering. Remember, no argument has ever decreased anyone's monthly bills and keeping quiet has never increased anyone's savings.

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