With Father's Day coming up I felt it appropriate to post some jokes from http://www.fathers.com/ . These should make you chuckle some.
1) Top excuses if found asleep at your desk...
"I was just meditating on the mission statement and envisioning a new paradigm!" (This one actually works)
"Just pacing myself for the all-nighter tonight!"
"I was working smarter - not harder."
2) Things I Wish I Had Known Before I Went Out in the Real World:
** A person needs only two tools: WD-40 and duct tape. If it doesn't move and it should, use WD-40. If it moves and it shouldn't, use the tape.
** When baking, follow directions. When cooking, go by your own taste.
** The five most essential words for a healthy, vital relationship: "I apologize" and "You are right."
3)From a dad ...
One day my wife, daughter (who was 7 at the time), and I were driving to my mother-in-law's, about 50 miles away. My daughter always wants to play games while we drive, so I suggested I SPY.
My Daughter said, "I spy something blue."
I answered, "The car in front of us." I was right.
My turn. Looking at the sky, there were dark clouds and it looked as if it was about to rain. I said, "I spy something gray and threatening."
Without a pause, my daughter chimed up from the back said, "DAD!" My wife couldn't stop laughing for 10 miles.
4) Hummm...
There isn't a single thing wrong with the younger generation that the older generation didn't outgrow. (
5) Things I Wish I Had Known Before I Went Out in the Real World:
** Being happy doesn't mean everything's perfect; it just means you've decided to see beyond the imperfections.
** Real friends are those who, when you feel you've made a fool of yourself, don't feel you've done a permanent job.
** Sometimes the majority only means that all the fools are on the same side.
Larry Morris is a Certified Mortgage Planning Specialist with American Nationwide Mortgage Company in Newberg, Oregon. He specializes in USDA Guaranteed Rural Home Loans, FHA Purchase and Refinance, FHA 203k Rehab loans, Sect 184 Native American loans, Hobby Farm loans and conforming purchase and refinances in the states of Oregon and Washington.
He can be reached at 503-421-0096, or larry@PDX-Mortgage.com.
www.PDX-Mortgage.com
OR License ML-3259
WA License WA-510-LO-51175
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