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I Like the House but I am Not in Love With It!

By Jeff Dowler, CRS

Real Estate Agent with eXp Realty of California, Inc. CA DRE #01490977

September 13, 2009 08:45 AM

I Like the House But I am Not in Love with It!

Is falling in love with a home you are buying important?

Is it OK to like a house, and hope to fall in love later?

Or should the initial reaction be stronger than that?

And is not being in love a good reason to not buy?

Are you in love with the house you are buying

I suspect this varies from person to person. I had someone just the other day make this comment when out looking at homes, and it really made me realize that for some people being in love with a house really IS important, even if the house meets all the requirements from a logical perspective. And they would prefer to wait until that happens, as opposed to buying something they "like" with the hope that liking the home will evolve into loving it.

No doubt it depends on the person as well as on the situation. If you really NEED to buy a home, then settling for like instead of love is probably OK. And price range and budget may dictate a decision other than being in love does.

Clearly some people buy homes based on their emotional responses while others are more analytical and logical in their purchase decisions.

One wonders - does the love overshadow the logic? If you love a home for some reason but know that logically it may not be the best decision will you still buy it.

Perhaps there are no right or wrong answers, but only choices based on the individual. I think it's prudent to be aware of these issues and one's own responses when engaged in the home search. And I personally enjoy the discussions that buyers have with me about these feelings and their decision-making. My belief is that if it doesn't feel right, then the best choice is to move on.

Any thoughts?

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If I can provide more information about Solana Beach real estate and surrounding areas, or the housing market in general, or otherwise assist you in your homes search, please contact me by phone or text at (760) 840-1360 or email me at JDowler@remax.net.

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Dana Wilkinson

Connect Realty, The Woodlands, TX - The Woodlands, TX

Broker-Your TX agent for The Woodlands-Spring-Conr

I bought my home five years ago, and was in love with the "possibility" of having a beautiful yard, but it was only in my imagination. The house needed a lot of work, too. Lots of like, but no love...we were just friends for a good while. As luck would have it, I now love my home, but I understand that I am not the normal buyer. Many people expect some kind of epiphany when it is "right" for them.

Sep 13, 2009 09:00 AM

Lenn Harley

Lenn Harley, Homefinders.com, MD & VA Homes and Real Estate - Leesburg, VA

Real Estate Broker - Virginia & Maryland

Which is, of course, why we have to listen to buyers. Take them on a tour, see what they say about homes in their price range. Then, find the best and they'll "Fall In Love".

Sep 13, 2009 09:13 AM

Sharon Senger

tcDocs - Seattle, WA

Licensed Transaction Coordinator

Jeff,

In my opinion it depends on the person and the circumstances. If you are looking for an investment property then yes it is purely a financial decision. If on the other hand it is your home you view it completely different. I personally have to fall in love with the house which is what happened when we found our current home and we are still in love with it!!!!

Sep 13, 2009 10:00 AM

Jim Hale

ACTIONAGENTS.NET - Eugene, OR

Eugene Oregon's Best Home Search Website

Jeff:

Lenn has it down pat: Listen. Educate. Match. (As in play match-maker.)

Sep 13, 2009 10:06 AM

Margaret Rome Baltimore 410-530-2400

HomeRome Realty 410-530-2400 - Pikesville, MD

Sell Your Home With Margaret Rome

Jeff, Do you believe in love at first sight? Or is it lust with potential?

It is fun to watch buyers falling in love. But this happens after comparing several...and yes it has to be in their price range.

Sep 13, 2009 01:09 PM

Jeff Dowler, CRS

eXp Realty of California, Inc. - Carlsbad, CA

The Southern California Relocation Dude

Dana - I have done the same. We bought one home we liked and later it was perhaps our fave.

Lenn - another nail on the head.

Sharon - I generally agree with that. I have had a couple of buyers who were so analytiucal about their home and it really was onlyt a place to live and hang their hat. Just not that emotioanlly important to them, which I think is rare.

Jim - I like that - Listen. Educate Match. Thanks for stopping by to share.

Margaret - LOL. You are so clever. I have had buyers sho immeditely fell in love, adn bought, and others took quite a while for the relationship to progress. It's fun to watch. What I hate is when someone falls in love and then gets the "Dear John letter" that the home was bought by someone else.

Jeff

Sep 13, 2009 01:22 PM

Jamie Dumaine-Russell

RE/MAX Alliance - Branford, CT

Jeff - I've had buyers who did not immediately fall in love with the home they bought but it fit their needs and price range at the time. Others have needed to wait for that "aha" moment before making their decision to buy.

When I bought my house 10 years ago, it wasn't perfect. What made me love it and sold me on it was a screened in porch off our master bedroom that I could see my family sitting on those warm summer evenings. That porch brought us all so much closer together and has some great stories to tell. :)

Sep 13, 2009 01:38 PM

Terry & Bonnie Westbrook

Westbrook Realty Broker-Owner - Grand Rapids, MI

Westbrook Realty - Grand Rapids Forest Hills MI Re

For me personally it is function and the price. If both fit I'm if not then on to the next home. I think the first time home buyer is much more on emotion and we need to make sure the excitement does not lead them to a bad decision.

Sep 13, 2009 02:30 PM

Jeff Dowler, CRS

eXp Realty of California, Inc. - Carlsbad, CA

The Southern California Relocation Dude

Donna - I have similar experiences, personally and with buyers.

Terry and Bonnie - great point. It's easy to make a wrong decision when the emotions take over.

Jeff

Sep 13, 2009 03:33 PM

Anonymous

Bill

Bought my first home in the 1970's in Carlsbad. I love it still today and hundreds of thousands of dollars later in upgrades. I'm lucky my wife from the 70's didn't require that kind of remodeling....she's still a classic :-)

Sep 14, 2009 12:49 AM

#10

Patricia Kennedy

RLAH@properties - Washington, DC

Home in the Capital

I dunno, Jeff! I think it's important to use both sides of the brain when you're buying a house. My own purchase was totally emotional, and now I wish I'd applied a little more thought to it. Mostly it has to do with it being an old place needing a rehab - and I totally underestimated the time and money it would take. Still, it's a graet place and I like my neighbors.

Sep 14, 2009 03:07 AM

Hannah Williams

HomeStarr Realty - Philadelphia, PA

Expertise NE Philadelphia & Bucks 215-820-3376

Yes I believe when it is the right house for you you get that feeling..You just know it..as long as it fits your budget Grab it

HELPFULHANNAH

Sep 14, 2009 04:02 AM