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there was a Turtle, a Lizard and a Rabbit....

By
Real Estate Agent with Jameson Sotheby's International Realty

It's now been four years since my older sister Chelley was taken from us. It's odd, losing a sister, as those of you who've also lost close family members can attest.  They say time heals all wounds, and while time does make it better... I don't think the wound is yet healed.  As my brother-in-law once said, regarding the death of his Father.  "It doesn't get better... it just gets different".

Chelley died from AML (Acute Myloid Leukemia) at the ripe old age of 53.  She'd battled the disease valiantly, but in the end, she ended up right where she didn't want.  In a sterile hospital room, dealing with "needles". (she hated hospitals, and she hated needles). At least she was surrounded by as much family as would fit in that little hospital room.

I don't think of her every day.  In fact there are entire weeks, where she doesn't cross my mind.  And then, suddenly and without warning, someone will say something "Chelley-esque", or I'll hear a song of her genre (ala Lesley Gore's "Sunshine Lollipops and Rainbows", and memories of Chelley will come flooding back.

(I know, Lesley Gore was kinda geeky, but her songs were catchy... go figure )

Rochelle Rose
1952-2005

Chelley had that kind of infectious laughter, that once she started giggling, it made those around her laugh too.  And Chelley would giggle at the drop of a hat.  Especially at stupid jokes.

She used to tell this one joke... okay, it was funny ONCE.  But Chelley laughed at it every time, and primarily because it ended with a "bad" word.

So if she tried to tell the joke (with the bad word in it) she'd start laughing at the beginning... 'cause she knew what was coming... and by the time she was firmly in the middle of the telling... she was laughing so hard that she was crying... and everyone was laughing with her.

We rarely made it to the "bad" word, but the entire family knew that joke by heart... and would often request that she "attempt" to tell it, just to watch her dissolve into laughter.

I miss that.

In the end, the disease had inured her to "bad words", and she had become able to even "flip me a bird" with those fancy manicured nails of hers (she liked her manicures to include racing stripes, and attached gemstones)... which was funny, in and of itself.  The girl who couldn't say the "bad" word, could "flip me a bird"...

so, there was a turtle, a lizard and a rabbit.

 

 

 

Posted by

 ALAN MAY, Realtor®   
Specializing in Evanston Real Estate and North Shore Real Estate

Jameson Sotheby's International Realty, 2934 Central Street, Evanston, IL 60201
Office: 847.869.7300      Cell: 847.924.3313      Email: Almay@aol.com

Evanston Real Estate & North Shore Real Estate
Licensed in Illinois

   

Comments (16)

Larry Bettag
Cherry Creek Mortgage Illinois Residential Mortgage License LMB #0005759 Cherry Creek Mortgage NMLS #: 3001 - Saint Charles, IL
Vice-President of National Production

Kudos to you.  Sounds like a great sister.  My brother is a hematologist oncologist and sees this quite a bit.  It's sad and unfortunate.  Nice of you to carrie her torch forward.  Be blessed in your memories.

Oct 26, 2009 01:24 AM
Susan Brown
Keller Williams NE, Kingwood Texas (Humble & Atascocita too) - Kingwood, TX

Alan, What a nice tribute to your sister, Chelley.  And your brother-in-law is so right, it doesn't get better it just gets different.  Now you've got me wondering about the joke!

Oct 26, 2009 01:28 AM
Gary L. Waters Broker Associate, Bucci Realty
Bucci Realty, Inc. - Melbourne, FL
Eighteen Years Experience in Brevard County

Nice post. I like that sentence "it doesn't get better...." Remembering the good times carries us through some challenges!

Oct 26, 2009 01:31 AM
Harry F. D'Elia III
WEDO Real Estate and Beyond, LLC - Phoenix, AZ
Investor , Mentor, GRI, Radio, CIPS, REOs, ABR

Thanks for sharing your moment with us this morning. Memories do last a life time.

Oct 26, 2009 01:32 AM
Charles Buell
Charles Buell Inspections Inc. - Seattle, WA
Seattle Home Inspector

Alan, in some ways our family and friends that die never completly leave us----it is the one way conversation that makes it so hard.

Oct 26, 2009 01:38 AM
Marcy Eastham
Town & Country Realty Corvallis Oregon - Corvallis, OR

Alan, it sounds like you have a wonderful family.  Sorry you lost your sister far too soon.  A friend of mine was diagnosed with Leukemia and was gone in three days.  You just never know.  I vow to live each day to the fullest and not let things get me down.  Take care and keep your family close.

Oct 26, 2009 02:19 AM
Betina Foreman
WJK Realty - Austin, TX
Realtor, C.N.E., with WJK REALTY

Dear Alan,

I am sorry about the loss of your sister. She sounds like a fun and interesting person. They say time heals all wounds, but a loss like that never totally heals. Good luck and God bless my friend.

Betina

Oct 26, 2009 02:35 AM
Ian Niquette
Square One Home Inspection - Markesan, WI

Alan, the loss o f a family can be very difficult. I lost a fammily member four years ago as well, and the quote is  true. It doesn't get better, just different. I still talk to him sometimes when I am alone, and I smile thinking of the responses he would have given me. In the end we have to carry on, and use the memories to our advantage. Good luck, and take care.

Oct 26, 2009 02:42 AM
Colleen Fischesser Northwest Property Shop
NextHome Experience - Chelan, WA
A Tradition of Trust in the Pacific NW since 1990!

What a beautiful tribute to share with us. Racing stripes and gemstones and giggling....gotta love that!

Oct 26, 2009 03:26 AM
Jane Peters
Home Jane Realty - Los Angeles, CA
Los Angeles real estate concierge services

Great tribute, Alan.  It is sad to lose anyone, but at that age.  So young. 

Oct 26, 2009 10:35 AM
Alan May
Jameson Sotheby's International Realty - Evanston, IL
Home is where the hearth is.

thanks all... it was a tough day for mom.

Oct 27, 2009 02:17 AM
Susan Mangigian
RE/MAX Preferred - West Chester, PA
Chester & Delaware County Homes, Delaware and Ches

Alan, this was beautiful.  I feel for you and your family, especially your mom, to have lost such a bright light.  I imagine it doesn't get better, but with time the smiles outnumber the tears when you remember.  At least I hope so.  xxoo

Oct 27, 2009 04:10 PM
Craig Rutman
Helping people in transition - Cary, NC
Raleigh, Cary, Apex area Realtor

Naturally, my first thought is I'm so sorry for the loss of your sister. It's obvious from this, and other posts you've written about her, that she was very special to you.

Thanks for opening up your heart to us here in the Rain.

May your memories of your sister never leave you.

Oct 28, 2009 12:28 AM
Alan May
Jameson Sotheby's International Realty - Evanston, IL
Home is where the hearth is.

Susan - as difficult as it is to lose a sibling at an early age... I can't imagine how a parent can cope with the loss of a child.  My mother's mantra over the last 4 years has been "it's wrong for a parent to survive her child... it's just wrong".

Craig - Oddly enough, Craig... she wasn't that "special" to me... she was my older sister... we didn't talk often... she had a family of her own and lived a distance away, so we saw her infrequently ... but she was always "out there".   Now that she's not ... it's just weird... you know?

Oct 28, 2009 12:56 AM
Susan Mangigian
RE/MAX Preferred - West Chester, PA
Chester & Delaware County Homes, Delaware and Ches

Alan, I'll never forget when my mom's older brother died.  I was about 22, so that would make him mid 50's somewhere.  My grandmother was totally and absolutely bereft.  And your mom is right.  It is so wrong for a parent to survive a child.

Oct 28, 2009 01:28 AM
Alan May
Jameson Sotheby's International Realty - Evanston, IL
Home is where the hearth is.

it plays havoc with the cosmos, Susan.   It really does.

Oct 28, 2009 04:03 AM