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Your Facebook friends may have hidden you and you didn't know it!  Yes, you could be talking to, well, no one.  OK- maybe it's not that bad, but there may be some friends you are missing.

I have been on Facebook for about a year now and have amassed a modest 127 friends.  I don't often go seeking friends but I do love adding friends when they find me!  Facebook has been a great way for me to get to know friends better, colleagues, and sometimes even strangers if we have a common bond such as our business.

I love sharing what I'm doing and hearing about what my friends are up to during the day.  But, as with anything, there are times when it's not so much a thrill.  There are times I have "un-friended" people and have "hidden" others. 

 Why?

 What were their crimes to deserve this?  As I share a few reasons, consider if you've been guilty!

Unfriended:  Generally the only reason I would actually "un-friend" someone is for obscenity.  It's my Facebook, I have other friends and colleagues who see it, and I just plain don't want it.  

Hidden:  I "hide" people more often when I don't want to lose their friendship but I just can't take their posts any longer!  This allows me to occasionally go in and see what they're up to and still maintain contact with them.  Most of the time, they're not aware they're hidden and that I'm not seeing their posts. 

Some reasons I have "hidden" friends:

•  Constant sales pitch:  Whether it's business, politics, your religion, or your new diet you can't stop talking about.  Mention it now and then, fine.  Post it over and over and over again, sometimes 3 or more times in a row and you're hidden.  

•  Constant updates:  Like 4-5 in a row.  Whether it's what you're doing every minute, or what you ate-- edit yourself.  Please.  I really do not need to know everything

•  Quotes:  Remember:  You are not the only one who constantly posts quotes.  There's only so many quotes I can take!

I think the thing to remember is that this is Social Media-- with the emphasis on social.  It is not usually the content that will get someone hidden as much as it is the frequency of that content.  I want to know who you are, not your sales pitch, or a random quote.  Think of it as a party-- you wouldn't walk in and start your sales pitch.  You would seek to form relationships.

Facebook is also a "give and take."  Do you post frequently but never comment on anyone else's posts?  Don't be a selfish Facebook friend!  How good can a relationship be if it's one-sided?

Facebook is a wonderful way to connect and re-connect with friends, colleagues, and others, but as in any relationship, it needs nourishment and time invested.

So, are there Facebook habits you can change?  I know I'm not the only one who hides people for these reasons!

 Please try to avoid these habits-- you are in a vibrant industry with plenty of great things to share! 

Don't go and get yourself hidden!

  

  

Michele Roseis a Realtor and Professional Home Stager in Burlington County, NJ.  She has been assisting both buyers and sellers with their real estate needs for the last 5 years.  In 2007, she formed Rose-Colored Staging to help sellers market their homes with professional home staging.

  

 
Post is included in group: Cosmic Cow Pie...The Rome Way

122 Comments on Are You a Facebook Friend Who Gets "Hidden?"

OCT
30
2009

One of my family members is hidden because he just provides all of us "too much information" and posts that overwhelm our sites.  Good reminder!

12:37pm • #1
1,215,723 Points 44 Featured Posts Localism Sponsor Outside Blog Attended Rain Camp Called Shot Master

Hi Michelle - I hide Applications much more than Friends. This way I can still get the quality content without all of the noise of the latest high score or quiz results. It would be nice if friends paid attention when adding applications and did not allow them to post to their news feeds, but at least I'm glad Facebook gives me a little control over it too.

12:43pm • #2
837,443 Points 163 Featured Posts Localism Sponsor Outside Blog Attended Rain Camp Called Shot Master

Michele - I handle things much like John mentioned above.  I don't enjoy reading about games or quizzes.  That being said, I would probably hide someone or unfriend them if they were constantly pitching something or cussing.  :)  I am used to the quote thing now, although I don't think it helps very much.  My example has always been to imagine walking into a party and quoting Benjamin Franklin or Mark Twain all night.  Would you be invited back? 

1:42pm • #3
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Boy, oh boy, I have hidden a few!  Even my own son one time (but we later made up!) 

One 'friend' grosses me out, but she is so outrageous that I leave her on.  I guess I am a nut too. :)

Sarah in Nashville

1:49pm • #4
497,480 Points 21 Featured Posts Localism Sponsor Outside Blog Called Shot Master

I never even knew you could hide a friend. Hmmmmm :) Great post Michele!

1:51pm • #5
728,376 Points 164 Featured Posts Outside Blog Attended Rain Camp Called Shot Master

I didn't know you could hide a friend either... how does one do that?

1:53pm • #6
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I like keeping my Facebook account for my personal life.  I use it as a way to keep up with friends who live far away.  I do think it can be a great way of keeping up with your local sphere and past clients.  I don't want to be one of the constant pitchmen always hawking my services.  I once posted a small HTML post to my own page (not my feed) just to try it out.  It ended up going into the feed without my intention of doing so.  I did receive some nice comments, but have not done it since.  It would be nice to find a good balance to share work experiences - a work in progress.

1:53pm • #7

I used to hide friends who used applications or took quizzes WAY too much. Grease Monkey's "Facebook Purity" has helped to delete all that stuff, and the new Facebook design is trying to (poorly), but if the junk is in their status posts (like you say, too many quotes or something) then even that won't work.  

Julie

2:03pm • #8
611,084 Points 11 Featured Posts Outside Blog Attended Rain Camp Called Shot Master

Great post- I too had to hide several people due to obscenity( I just don't want it on my wall) and yes some friends seem to almost be purely business these days !!!

2:05pm • #9

Thank you for all of the great tips! I agree that sometimes people need to edit themselves. I also get quite irritated with people who publish all of there game scores...I am on there to be social not compete on games. Thanks again

2:08pm • #10
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I am like John, I hide applications.  I also try to never post an update of my Mafia Wars or my Slot game.  I have a couple of "friends" hidden - usually they are not friends but someone that friend-ed me and had no idea who I was but is in the huge real estate sphere we are in. After several sales pitches - they go in hiding :)

2:14pm • #11
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When I first started out with Facebook I was way too salesy! I know I had peeps unfriend me :( I started to focus on my profile page and noticed there was not much interaction going on with my friends. Now I have found a nice blend.. 80% personal and about 20% business. The truth is my business is a big part of my life. If they don't want to hear about it... they can unfriend me and that is OK.

Great post!

2:19pm • #12
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You have just given me the permission to hide a few "friends" who I haven't even seen in a long time but feel like I am with them every second because of the frequency of the posts! Thanks.

2:27pm • #13
314,804 Points 2 Featured Posts Attended Rain Camp Called Shot Master

Hi Michele. I have made those who post their scores hidden. It can be too much. ~ Lana

2:27pm • #14

I've unfriended and hidden due to too many political posts.  I don't need it on facebook!

2:35pm • #15
385,588 Points 25 Featured Posts Outside Blog

Hi Michele.  Cute post. 

I certainly would consider myself a fairly aggressive facebooker...

I probably am hidden a few times.  Oh well, can't please everybody!

Thanks for writing,

Ken

2:35pm • #16

Good post, Michele.  Of course, I'm with everyone who hids the scores -- (who has time to play all those games, anyway).  I would say more about hiding someone who is constantly posting bitterness about political issues  - but, in case "they" read this, I'll just say, the politicing can get overwhelming, too. 

2:36pm • #17
Outside Blog

oh ya I don't post stuff over and ovr again dn't want to be the hidden friend good post

2:51pm • #18
1 Featured Post

wow, I didnt know I could hide friends.  I'll look into it.

I do find it annoying when my newsfeed is bombarded with that useless nonsense about farmville and mafia wars, I wish I could hide that.  Apparently it is possible from what I read here.  I'll be right back, I'm logging on to my facebook account to find out how I can hide that.

Thank you for posting!

-Nelson

P.S. Since we're facebookers here also, in case you want to join my network, feel free to request an add:

http://www.facebook.com/nelsoncarrillo

 

2:53pm • #19
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Hi Michele, I have also hidden some people, frankly I'd like to "unfriend" some... Will there be a notifications such as when you become first become friends?

2:55pm • #20
238,872 Points 1 Featured Post

Michele, I agree with you.  I have hidden a lot of "friends" who are constantly playing games.  I just don't get that! I have better things to do with my time, like reading your post about Facebook.

3:04pm • #21

i have only hidden one person, perhaps I need to spend more time on FB. j/k

3:05pm • #22
110,944 Points

I hide all the game and other similar apps. I haven't actually hidden anyones updates. MAybe I'm a bit nosey but I like seeing what everyone is up to:)

I do need to find a way to clean up some of my notifications, I have many offers to become someone neighbor in Farmville as well as request to join the mafia. I don't mind the request however I lack the time to play these games...

"Facebook is also a "give and take."  Do you post frequently but never comment on anyone else's posts?  Don't be a selfish Facebook friend!  How good can a relationship be if it's one-sided?" I am a huge beliver in showing interest in others, you're right, it is a bit selfish to post often and never comment on someone elses updates. If you are not interested in others, are they going to be interested in you? Probably not.

3:13pm • #23
Outside Blog Attended Rain Camp

I'm going to try hiding friends too! thanks for the tip!

3:20pm • #24
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Hi Michele, I am new to FB so I will take all the advice I can get. Thanks and have a great weekend.

3:22pm • #25

Thanks Michele,

I didn't know you could hide on Facebook. I just went in and "hid" most of the notifications on the games,Farmeville, etc...

Thanks for the great post!

Jane

3:32pm • #26
268,411 Points 7 Featured Posts Called Shot Master

Hello Michele, Great post, All good points. The one you forgot was the I threw a sheep at you, or mafia wars, or stuff like that. I don't get in virtual pillow fights and many people don't even understand what tehse things are so they don't respond. It's like in real life if you hit a guest in your house with a pillow and they didn't know you were having a pillow fight you might not get a good response.

3:32pm • #27

Great Facebook tips!  I agree- many people need to understand that whatever they post on FB, Twitter, etc will be attached to your online profile forever.

3:41pm • #28
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Laxson Associates:  Sometimes you just have to do it!  I always try to be careful of clogging up people's news feed!

John and Lana:  I hide applications all the time-- they just take up too much room.  It's much better to hide the app than the person.  Thanks for your comments! 

Jason:  The really frustrating thing about the quotes is that I just want to know the person.  Maybe some people aren't great at parties either!  LOL!

Sarah:  I also will tolerate some things from people I wouldn't normally because of the relationship we have.  It always comes down to relationships!  Some people are too fun to hide!

Jackie and Alan:  Yes, you can hide someone!  When they post, point your mouse over their post and a "Hide" button will show at the top right of the post.  Click onto that and it will give you the option to hide the person or, if they're using an application, to hide the app.  It's a wonderful thing!

Will:  I know a lot of people keep their personal accounts and business separate and that works for them.  I can't seem to separate the two!

Julie:  Yeah-- the posts that are not apps are the problems!

Michael:  All business is no fun :-)

Dawn and Jo:  I always hide the apps-- saves so much news feed space.  Every time a new one pops up, I hide it right away.  I also don't publish most of any games I do-- just out of consideration for others.

Team Newington:  80/20 is a great ratio!  Everyone should aim for that!  We are always learning, aren't we? :-)  Thanks for your comment!

Anjelica:  Permission granted!  Go for it!

Heather and Craig:  That would make me hide them too! 

Ken:  No-- you can't please everyone!  I'm probably hidden for something and I don't know it!  I just want to try to keep as much of my info out there as possible!

Greater Mortgage:  It's never fun to be the hidden friend!  LOL!

Nelson:  Hiding is a wonderful thing!  I'll check out your FB page!

Silvia:  No-- they have no clue.  The only way they know is if they keep a close eye on their friends list and notice you're gone :-)

Sybil:  Thanks so much!  If the rest of their posts are OK, I would just hide the apps.  I've noticed a lot of games are played during work hours... hmmm!

James:  Maybe you have no "offenders" on your friends list!  Wow!

Thanks Jason-- I, too, love the give and take and finding out about people's lives.  And it's true-- they become interested in your life too!

Marylou, Barb, and Jane:  You are welcome!  I didn't realize so many people didn't know about hiding!  It makes FB so much better when you have that control.

Hi Spokane!  I didn't include those because I can hide the apps without hiding the people, which I prefer to do.  Now, after the comments, I'm realizing not everyone knows they can hide those apps so I'm really they were addressed in the comments!  And I agree-- I don't care to be in a pillow fight or a snowball fight or mafia wars-- who has time for that?

3:42pm • #29
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JB-  Thanks!  We have to be very careful about what we put "out there!"   

3:45pm • #30
128,011 Points Outside Blog

I'm using this feauture time to time. Always somebody there that you just have enough :)

3:55pm • #31
243,461 Points 1 Featured Post Outside Blog Attended Rain Camp Called Shot Master

great post. I'm new to facebook.This is new and helpful info for me.

3:56pm • #32

This is a very timely post!  i just started my Facebook page a few weeks ago and I have 1 main person who must not have a job because when I log on there are tons of Mafia or Mob wars things from him - every day!  Now I know how to hide it!!!  Thanks!!!

Brian.

4:08pm • #33
Outside Blog

Michele,

I joined Facebook because I was under the assumption that it, as you say, is a great way to connect with friends, family and business colleagues.  I too have hidden a few of my contacts because they get, well,uh, down right silly.  Apparently Facebook has some features that I could care less about, Farmville Vampire Wars, Poking, etc.  I don't want to be a snob, but I just don't have the time for these inane features.  I'm still trying to find the real value of Facebook for me. Thanks for posting.

4:23pm • #34
150,486 Points 2 Featured Posts

Great suggestions.  I've been on facebook for about a year and have to admit it  "i'm not very good at it'

I even sat with my 15 year old granddaughter for lessons.   The progress that I've made is to have two accounts.   One that's truly for my friends and family and the other is for everyone that I know and want to keep up with.

My family stuff is private and do not want to share photos etc with the world

4:25pm • #35
1 Featured Post

Michele

Thanks for the post. Out of curiosity, is there a way to determine if a friend has hidden us ?  Lol.

Thanks again

4:36pm • #36
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I have gone as far as to block some people so they can't even find me.  It's like I just don't exist to them anymore.  Had one "friend" who kept posting about a very personal matter and facebook just isn't the place for airing your dirty laundry.  Unfriended that one.  I agree, it's MY facebook and if you cross certain lines... click, you will "disappear".

4:40pm • #37
428,191 Points 8 Featured Posts Outside Blog Attended Rain Camp Called Shot Master

I hide applications instead of friends and this greatly reduces the junk in my live feed (no more mafia wars, farm whatever, or sorosity life).  My husband calls those people who post excessively "facebook clutter".

4:44pm • #38
498,000 Points 8 Featured Posts Localism Sponsor Outside Blog Called Shot Master

Michele - this is a good post, and I have un-friended some as well. I have also found that FB users do not understand twitter lingo if they are not on twitter, and don't really understand it.

4:46pm • #39
226,384 Points 7 Featured Posts Outside Blog Attended Rain Camp Called Shot Master

Funny, I had no idea you could "hide" friends! Boy there are a few that I may have to do this too! I can not handle any more Mafia Wars! I have never started (so many say that is addictive) and I just do not want to bombard my friends with this type of stuff. I agree in keeping it real. My friends know what I am up to some of it business, some of it pleasure! I am who I am and I am not a Mafia Boss! Stop asking me for money!

4:49pm • #40
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Michele ~ I did not know about the "hidden" feature but I like it! It might a good to use on family as well (LOL) as well as those annoying friends who appear somewhat noisy!!! Thanks for passing along these really helpful Facebook tips.

4:55pm • #41
402,500 Points 4 Featured Posts Attended Rain Camp Called Shot Master

Michelle - thanks for this post. It is very disconcerting thing when you have people that have "friended" you and then slam you with stuff you don't want constantly and being bombarded with all this is just another form of spam in my humble opinion.. Just my 2cents...

5:03pm • #42
167,144 Points 3 Featured Posts Called Shot Master

I hide people (mostly high school acquaintances who post a daily breakfast alert) AND applications.

To those who have asked, hiding someone works a little like ignoring a friend request in that there isn't any notification to the newly hidden. So no, you won't know if YOU'VE been hidden either.

5:08pm • #43

Hi Michelle,

What a fun and timely post.  I just discovered the "Hide" button today by accident and was playing with it; so I am so happy to discover how everyone is using this feature.  I haven't had to "hide" anyone yet, but it's fun to know that the option exists.

What a great Facebook tip...thanks!

 

 

Elaine Guilbert
5:19pm • #44

I didn't know you could hide applications. I have a hidden a couple people who must spend their whole day on youtube and other sites sharing what they find on fb every day, and not even just 1 or 2 items a day, but multitudes. Then there are the people who always take sexuality tests, or play poker all day long.  Thank you for what will now be a clean homepage!   

5:39pm • #45
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Megan and Tammy:  I agree!  We need to have control over our FB and when we've had enough--- buh-bye!  I also like that I can delete their comments on my posts if need be.

Rob, Brian and Mercedes:  So glad to help!  FB is wonderful if you know the tools to use it wisely.  It's great to cut past the silliness and start really getting to know people.

Virginia:  It's great you can separate the two-- I don't think I could!

Thor:  LOL!  Unfortunately, no!  Although if someone NEVER comments on our posts, we may get a clue!

Stacey-Ann:  Facebook Clutter is right!  As a home stager, I truly appreciate de-cluttering!

Sharon:  Have to admit, I'm still getting used to Twitter myself.  Much more comfortable with FB but I'm getting there!

Stephanie:  Authenticity is golden!  We are in a people industry, first and foremost!

Terri:  It is indeed helpful to cut down on the "noise" to truly appreciate what a great place FB is.

Robert:  I totally agree!  We could say that they were speaking, "spam-ish!"  LOL!  I'm making up my own words now!  Really, though, first sign of that and they're hidden-- they can listen to me but I can't hear them-- love that!

Julia:  Hiding is a kinder, gentler way of ignoring someone :-)  I do occasionally go in and un-hide someone to see if they've changed their ways.  Everyone deserves a 2nd chance.  If they haven't changed, well, back into hiding they go!

Elaine:  Thanks so much for your comment!  I'm sure you'll use it someday :-)

Eve:  You'll be surprised at how much better your news feed will be!  Keep hiding those apps!

5:40pm • #46
238,023 Points 7 Featured Posts Attended Rain Camp

I had my facebook before I ever used it for real estate.  I'm not sure I can ever transition it into a professional page.  I started a facebook business page for that reason.  Great points though.  It's tough to find that happy medium between being social and spamming your friends with business updates.

5:46pm • #47
233,380 Points Outside Blog

I need to look at Facebook more I guess.  Didn't even know that could be done.  No wonder no ever answers me.

6:06pm • #48
302,567 Points 4 Featured Posts Attended Rain Camp

Michele, I have used FB defriending for obscenity too.  :)  And I've had to hide a few folks because they share every tiny tidbit of their day.  Again too much.  Sometimes I wish the hide button would work in real life!

6:23pm • #49

I save Facebook for my personal socializing and leave Twitter, Active Rain, Linkedin, etc for business.  Most of my friends are relatives that I have never met. cousins, cousins kids, etc. and of course some old friends that I had lost touch with and a few that I wish I had not friended as I never had a friendship with them in the past (old high school acquaintances) but I was new to Facebook and didn't really understand how it worked.  I have unfriended one person  and hidden a few others. I have hidden a relative as I don't like his crude attitude and language.  I am mindful of mine and expect those that I have as friends mind theirs also.  I don't mind political or religious discussions and acutally welcome them as I may learn something I didn't know  and I am always curious to here other views but if it turns to slamming the person and slinging insults at anyone, including me if I don't agree with their views, - they will be gone!   

6:32pm • #50
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David:  People we've befriended are usually interested in us and what we do-- as long as we aren't constantly selling to them.  We can remind people what we do, without becoming overbearing.

Gene:  LOL!  I've had plenty of posts that seem to "miss" but then others get responses.  You never know!

Susan:  A real-life hide button!  Imagine the possibilities!  LOL! 

Diana:  I have heard some people fear getting into these sites partly because of some of the things you mentioned.  We have the control though to make them what we want them to be!  

6:45pm • #51
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Good points.  I am probably a hidden friend - LOL  I hope not - I try to not be pitchy.  I just don't operate that way, but I still could be annoying I suppose:)  I hope not:)

6:47pm • #52

I need to hide a couple people constantly advertising there business, products etc. I try not to do that with my personal page, I post it on my business page. Also, don't like to friend with all realtors, I don't think that's a good thing to do.

Does anyone know how I can delete a group page on facebook? 

Also, how to add a "become fan" to business page?

8:04pm • #56
122,644 Points 1 Featured Post Outside Blog Called Shot Master

I hid an aquaintance because she was posting updates 5-10 times a day.  Then, she started commenting me EVERY time I posted a status.... which might be 3-5 times a week.  We are not best buddies, so I would expect an occasional comment, but not on everything.  A couple of times I deleted her comments and a few times she did the "like" option, which I was unable to delete.  So, I deleted her.

8:11pm • #57
221,977 Points 9 Featured Posts Outside Blog Called Shot Master

I agree. I have hidden a friend for constant political messages! That is so annoying. I am also sick of the farm thing and the mafia thing and "what kind of cookie are you quiz" how silly!!!

8:12pm • #58
445,562 Points 11 Featured Posts Outside Blog

I have hidden people for prophanity..... for sales pitches that
are constant..... and for lewd, sexually explicit entries......

YES... it is a social network... and NO ~~~  I do NOT want to see  certain things....

Thanks for putting up this blog!!!

=-)

 

8:16pm • #59
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Courtney:  We are probably all hidden my someone!  LOL!  Hoping this helps everyone avoid it as much as possible!

You're welcome Karina!

LOL!  Tom:  interesting marketing angle!  For just 5 bucks you'll listen to my pitch!  What a steal!

Dan:  I agree it's not always best to friend everyone.  I don't usually turn anyone down-- I'll accept them, give them a chance, and then see if I want to keep them :-)  You can delete a group by opening the page, going to settings and click onto "deactivate account."  For becoming a fan, I believe the little box automatically comes up next to the name of the group-- unless you're already a fan, then you won't see it.

Tracie and Alexander:  Some people you just have to unfriend!  There's no getting around it.  Thanks for you comments!

Kristi:  There is a lot of silliness!  They can participate in the games and quizzes and all but they do not have to post them.  When I was new to FB, I played with it-- then I got bored.  I'd rather hear about someone's life than their mafia wars!

8:27pm • #60
Outside Blog

How true! Thanks for posting! We should all be more mindful of the "FB" arena...It seems that there are some things it was designed for and some things it was not!! Now that "everybody" and most all

"companies" are on Facebook, it is easier and easier to have too much of a good thing!

Social media seems to be a two way street, for sure. Thanks again!

8:45pm • #61
622,286 Points 21 Featured Posts Outside Blog

how do you un hide some people.  I hide some and now I want them back!!!

9:14pm • #62
524,985 Points 33 Featured Posts Localism Sponsor Outside Blog Attended Rain Camp Called Shot Master

Well this was a 'hit' - who would have guessed how many of us  didn't know and would love to use the 'hide'button? lol

9:55pm • #63
402,845 Points 1 Featured Post Localism Sponsor

Im growing slow and steady, no reason to rush and add everyone under the sun there.

10:10pm • #64
546,176 Points 11 Featured Posts

Hi Michele -- I don't use fb much, but what you say makes perfect sense.

10:23pm • #65
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I'm startingto get pretty annoyed by the quotes...  Of course, sales pitches and boring status updates start to annoy after a while, too. 

10:23pm • #66

Hi Michelle, I just joined ActiveRain an hour ago and I enjoyed reading your blog.  I just signup with Facebook last Saturday and I already have 47 friends.  Some of my friends would write things like, " Just woke up and now I'm drinking my first cup of coffe."  I would be thinking to myself,WHO CARES! LOL.  After reading your blog, I am going to start using the hidden button on FB quite frequently now. Its funny how within 6 days of being apart of the Facebook world, I'm in total agreement with you. Thanks for sharing. Lol

10:52pm • #67
584,243 Points 3 Featured Posts Outside Blog Called Shot Master

I knew you could hide people, but I didn't know you could hide apps. Those drive me crazy!

11:12pm • #68
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Barbara:  You definitely can have too much!  Boundaries are a good thing :-)

Russ:  From your home page go to the bottom to "edit options" and you'll see the people you've hidden-- hope this helps!  I often un-hide people after a while.

Liz:  It was really just a warning to watch out for people hiding US!  LOL!  I had no idea so many wanted to be able to hide others!  Very funny!

Larry:  That's the way to do it-- it's about the relationships.

Thanks Chris!

Tiffany:  Thanks for your comment and welcome to AR!  It's a great place to be!  47 friends in 1 week is a lot and can be overwhelming!  Start by hiding the apps first and then look for the "repeat offenders" in the updates.  Everyone has the occasional boring update or sales pitch but it's the patterns you should look for.  I have gotten business from FB so it is possible to build relationships and your business there. 

Cindy:  Hiding apps is a wonderful thing-- as soon as a new one pops up, I make it go away!  Love it!

11:13pm • #69
531,037 Points 4 Featured Posts Outside Blog

very interesting about hidding friends. I have heard of this but have never hid anyone.

11:56pm • #70
OCT
31
2009
277,620 Points 8 Featured Posts Localism Sponsor Outside Blog Attended Rain Camp Called Shot Master

I hide anyone who repeatedly has those stupid surveys and such on facebook.

12:24am • #71
615,230 Points Localism Sponsor Outside Blog

Gotta look into this hiding friends thing -- was not aware this was possible -- thanks.

12:25am • #72
687,078 Points 83 Featured Posts Outside Blog Attended Rain Camp Called Shot Master

De-friending always sounds to me like a Seinfeld episode "regifting."  :-)  Nice blog, and didn't know about that feature either.  Thanks! 

12:41am • #73
193,448 Points 1 Featured Post Localism Sponsor Outside Blog

It is a challenge to keep up on Facebook Michele. I try to answer posts and keep in touch. I should hire a Social Media assistant. lol

12:41am • #74
241,469 Points 20 Featured Posts Outside Blog Attended Rain Camp Called Shot Master

Michele,

Great rules of engagement... I do think that some people are just learning.. so might want to unhide them from time to time as I know it took me awhile to learn this... so before kicking someone to the HIDE curb forever.... give them another chance as they may have learned along the way...

One way of knowing if you have been kicked to the curb.. is if you write something on their wall or comment and they do not respond back.. they just did not see it!  You were hidden.

Thanks again for the great tips!

1:12am • #75
4 Featured Posts Outside Blog

good post! i have never hidden anyone or even known you can do that. i can certainly agree with the sales pitch! that is grounds for dismissal and i've done it. can't take it...

1:19am • #76
503,737 Points 39 Featured Posts Localism Sponsor Outside Blog Called Shot Master

Oh my, I must not only be hidden, but I'm probably buried.  I always allow my new listings on vFlyer and Postlets to go onto my profile on Facebook.  I didn't know about this feature.  Now that I know about it, I may bury a few friends myself!  First, I have to figure out how.

1:39am • #77
131,500 Points 1 Featured Post Called Shot Master

This is a great post! 

Thanks for sharing.  

I just got on facebook about three weeks ago.... and, frankly, didn't know how it worked.  I posted some of my listings....... and two "friends" from high school made a "not so nice" comment.

One said she was going to hide me---I didn't know what that meant, and the other agreed with her.  Her comment was that "Facebook is for fun and not advertising!"  I thought that was so "high school!"

I don't know if Facebook is just a great place to promote your business, but it can be fun to play some of their games.  

3:43am • #78
461,372 Points 29 Featured Posts Outside Blog Attended Rain Camp Called Shot Master

Michele ~ Great post, worthy of the gold star.  I admit I was happy when by chance one day I noticed the "hide" feature on FB!  Those who do the endless games and other stuff like that will remain hidden. (I guess I don't see the point nor have the time to waste.  It seemed like something you'd love if you were in 6th grade!)  The endless updates are also just plain unnecessary.  I'm not sure though how to hide applications ... checked under privacy settings but couldn't find the spot ... any suggestions?

5:32am • #79
429,318 Points 57 Featured Posts Localism Sponsor Outside Blog Called Shot Master

You hit some terrific points in this post. I am glad to see it was featured.  Excellent and right on target.

7:10am • #80
848,632 Points 153 Featured Posts Localism Sponsor Outside Blog Hit Router Attended Rain Camp Called Shot Master

Michele, I hide games, like Mafia Wars and that fish thing. It was driving me crazy. I just hid the application and not the friends. I still want to hear from them but not in those games.

Excellent post and idea's.

8:33am • #81
122,536 Points Outside Blog Attended Rain Camp

Michele,

I've also hidden most of the games but not the friends unless there's profanity.  Facebook is a great way to keep in touch with friends and family.

Great post.

9:12am • #82

Great post!  As we learn to use Social Media, it's wonderful to be able to learn etiquette and tips from other users.

I keep my main profile as 95% personal.  I've also set up a fan page for my friends (and strangers) to follow my real estate business. I'm constantly amazed by the number of business inquiries I'm getting on FB!

You can check out my fan page by googling Meagan Kempf, Realtor or clicking here - I'd love to have you as a fan!

Meagan Kempf
Realtor in Northern Michigan
www.MeaganKempf.com

 

 

10:52am • #83
178,399 Points 10 Featured Posts Hit Router

Michelle - we follow pretty much the same guidelines for hiding friends on Facebook, except I would add one more:

4. If your Twitter stream feeds to Facebook (similar to Constant Updates but even more annoying)! It's great that you figured out how to link the two services but they are very different and really shouldn't be mixed.

11:04am • #84

I've been "unfriended" by a couple of people (I have rather......uhhhhhh...firm political stances of a conservative bend) and have unfriended a couple of others. One was a good friend with whom I have one major difference: I am Christian and he is atheist. That never became a problem until I saw his FB posts, most of which were militantly, sarcastically and insultingly anti-religion. Ah, well.......

11:33am • #85

Oh, and another thing to consider: When making a FB "friend", after a while you may want to evaluate whether this is a person you would consider befriending in real, not virtual, life. Like in real life some FB friends are simply too high maintenance.

11:35am • #86

I just started on FB a couple weeks ago. I hide the apps, have unfriended a couple, and totally blocked one. I would add the AR feeds to the annoyances as well, both on FB and on Twitter. I had one person send 10 AR feeds in just a matter of minutes. No engagement with other people, so I un-friended. I'm only friending people I know or am related to. Garnering "thousands" of friends is not an ego thing for me.

11:38am • #87
125,003 Points 3 Featured Posts Localism Sponsor Outside Blog

Carla:  Thanks!  It reminded me of re-gifting too!  LOL! 

Mark:  It is time consuming!  I know many people have a set time to catch up and maintain it all-- I have not yet accomplished that. 

Carra:  I do un-hide people regularly to touch base with them and to give them another chance.  I believe the hiding only works in the news feed-- not the wall or comments.  I know I still get comments from people I've hidden.  But I do get a clue when someone NEVER responds to any post I put up-- LOL!

Thanks Dee!  Glad to share it!

LOL!  Gail!  I post listings and staging jobs as well but I try to be careful about it.  It's best to develop relationships with your friends first and make FB mostly personal and entertaining.  The Hide feature is simple-- hover your mouse over the person's post and you'll see a hide button at the top right.  Click onto that and you have the option to hide the person altogether or just the app if they're using one.  Almost TOO easy!  LOL!

Aida:  That's the stuff we want to try to avoid!  That's a shame-- I hope they give you another chance!  Keep responding to their posts and try to forge a relationship.  Focus on the "friendly" stuff and cut down on the business.  An update like, "On my way to do an open house" is a good way to remind people what you do without a sales pitch.  I've gotten business from FB so I know it works!

Thanks Maureen!  I was thrilled to see my gold star-- it's only my second!  The hide application can be done either from the person's post (see my response to Gail) or from the Notifications click "see all"  Then there will be an X to the right to delete the app.  Hope that helps!

Thank you "Florida Pines!"  I had no idea it would be such a hit! :-)

Thanks Missy and Nellie-- I take my time about hiding people-- it's not my first choice.  I would want them to give me the same chance!

Meagan:  Your fan page looks great!  I've become a fan!  It's a great example of how a business page should look.  For the personal page, 95% personal is a great number to aim for. 

Kevin and Monica:  I totally agree about the Twitter thing.  I think it's ok to post FB onto Twitter but not vice versa-- two different sites with different "mindsets."

Steve:  I agree.  Those are the kinds of posts I would hide or if they were really bad, unfriend.  I'm a conservative Christian but I'm not beating anyone over the head with my faith and I expect the same courtesy.  Would I start preaching at a party?  No-- I'd start meeting people and making friends.  And yeah-- some people in real life would be toooo much!  LOL!

Elaine:  Any feeds going to FB constantly are a bad idea-- it's just not the right platform.  Twitter is ok for that but not FB.  And I agree also-- FB for me is not so much a numbers game as it is an SOI and friendship building.  It's hard to do that with thousands or even hundreds of friends! 

12:04pm • #88
197,862 Points 5 Featured Posts

I bet I have been hidden! lol!  I try to keep my facebook profile a nice blend of business and personal so that I am not always selling, but not always goofing off either!  I must say that I get annoyed with the game scores, mafia, yoville, farmtown and etc. that log jams my page sometimes!

12:28pm • #89
300,676 Points 55 Featured Posts Localism Sponsor Outside Blog

Michele - Tanks for this wonderful tip.  I guess I am not the only one who did not know that we can play hide n seek on facebook.  I'll be playing this game myself.

12:31pm • #90

It's very hard to balance personal and business when you use face book for both...I hope I don't get hidden...

I always take agent friend requests by the way...lol

 

1:39pm • #91
860,635 Points 76 Featured Posts Outside Blog Attended Rain Camp Called Shot Master

I have hidden a bunch of "friends" who did nothing but post annoying nonsense. Sometimes it's just out of control.

3:15pm • #92
128,299 Points 1 Featured Post

Michele, great post. I have hidden a bunch of people for similar things. I have only "unfriended" a few, mostly hide. Good point about the point of social media is to be, well, SOCIAL! :-)

3:52pm • #93
1,007,109 Points 36 Featured Posts Outside Blog Attended Rain Camp Called Shot Master

I wouldn't mind learning how to hide people, and I really like the idea of turning off the applications for things like quizzes and games.

8:35pm • #95
3 Featured Posts Attended Rain Camp

Michele - I go through phases where I'll post daily, and then go a week silent! I got an email from a friend of mine that said "I will defriend you soon..." to which I replied "you'll miss me when i'm gone." But I did realize that sometimes, you just have to tone it down. It's called SOCIAL media for a reason! 

Great post!

11:12pm • #96
NOV
01
2009
202,236 Points 3 Featured Posts Outside Blog Hit Router

Facebook is interesting, I've still not completely gotten the hang of things, but working on it.  I too hate the "I'm sitting at a stoplight" sort of stuff.  BUt that's really prevelant on Twitter too.

1:12am • #97
727,633 Points 1 Featured Post Outside Blog Attended Rain Camp Called Shot Master

Michele - I wasn't aware that friends could be hidden on Facebook.

1:26am • #98
551,723 Points 3 Featured Posts Outside Blog Called Shot Master

Michele, You're essentially describing social media manners.  I appreciate the fact that facebook allows for managing our relationships to some degree.  As the comments to your post suggest not everyone has the same opinion on what those manners look like.  Good post!

2:17pm • #99
405,659 Points 2 Featured Posts Outside Blog

I treat facebook like AR. I comment all over the place because people comment on my posts as well.

4:10pm • #100

Hi Michele -- you obviously made a hit with this post and well deserved.  I'm fairly new to Facebook and have not had much time to try and figure it out.  It is a great way to stay in touch with my daughter, but, she plays that "Mafia" thing which drives me nuts.  Thanks to you I now know how to hide that "ap".

In December an area Continuing Ed instructor has taken sympathy on we of little Facebook knowledge and will do a free class on Facebook.  I can't wait!!  She's an excellent teacher and I'm really looking forward to it.

Thanks so much for your Post and everyone's comments.  I now think I can figure out how to hide "Mafia"!  Also -- you have taken a lot of time in your responses back and it's appreciated.

Gosh, Halloween's gone and soon it will be Thanksgiving, Christmas and a New Year!!  How time flies.

Sue of Robin and Sue

4:28pm • #101
147,213 Points 6 Featured Posts Outside Blog Attended Rain Camp

I've hidden people for too many politics and too many games...UGH!

5:36pm • #102
NOV
02
2009
125,003 Points 3 Featured Posts Localism Sponsor Outside Blog

Jeani, Scott, and Laura:  I think a LOT of us have been hidden without knowing it!  When real estate is so much a part of your life, it's hard to not "talk shop!"  Especially when you love what you do!  Scott, you'll be seeing my friend request! LOL!

Carol, Christine, Terrylynn, and Mark:  I am really surprised how many people did not know about the hide feature!  I'm so glad I posted this-- I think it will make everyone's FB experience much less frustrating!

Erica and Linda:  I think hiding some people actually helps me maintain the relationship with them-- they don't annoy me as much :-))

Thanks Marney!  Social is key-- FB is not a billboard for my adverstisements!  :-)

Dave-- Love that app!  Made me laugh!  I want one now-- get cracking--  I think it would be very popular!

Thanks "Chain Real Estate!"  You're right.  Social Media is still fairly new to a lot of people and we're still learning the etiquette of it.

Robert:  It's really a basic "Do unto others" way of connecting but a lot of people don't get that.

Thanks Sue!  That class sounds like it will be really helpful!  AR is also a great place to learn from others-- very thankful for it!

12:10pm • #103

Michele - this was a really great post and the responses speak to that. I have only hidden one person for being overly religeous. But I will try to figure out how to hide the apps - that is really annoying. Can you tell me how to hide this new facebook feature - View Live Feed. It gives way too much information. THanks

5:51pm • #104
NOV
13
2009
125,003 Points 3 Featured Posts Localism Sponsor Outside Blog

Hey Brian, just saw your post here-- sorry I missed it!  I don't think there's any way you can hide the live feed.  You can move your "News Feed" on the right hand column up so that it displays the news feed first and then choose to see only the news feed.  I don't like that because then you miss when others post pics, videos, links, etc. that are not part of the news feed.  I'm actually getting used to the new live feed now and kind of like seeing who's friending who and fans of, etc.  I've picked up more friends that way.  Hiding the apps is still the best way to get rid of the "noise."  Hope this helps!

10:50am • #106
111,792 Points 4 Featured Posts Hit Router

Hi Michele,  I missed your post but found it today after your comment and reblog of my post. Thanks for that! 

This one is a good one too!  And your first Featured post!  Woooha!  You are a great facebook friend and you make some great points here.  Thanks for commenting on mine.  I subscribed to your posts so I won't miss them next time.

Cheers.

Greg

12:03pm • #107
125,003 Points 3 Featured Posts Localism Sponsor Outside Blog

Thanks Greg!  It's actually my 2nd feature but they haven't changed my little star yet!  I was so thrilled!  It seems to have helped a lot of people.  I always enjoy hearing from you on FB too and you have definitely not been hidden LOL!

2:45pm • #108
NOV
16
2009
111,792 Points 4 Featured Posts Hit Router

Michele,  FYI.  The star badge doesn't seem to be getting update automatically.  I am not sure of the system but you may have to contact AR and tell them.  I had to do it for my 2nd feature and it looks like I have to do it again now for the last one.  PS, Thanks for not hiding me.  Nor have you been hidden.  ;)

1:47am • #109
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Thanks Greg!!  I will let them know if it doesn't change soon-- I love that little star!  LOL! 

4:00pm • #110
DEC
01
2009
608,296 Points 26 Featured Posts Localism Sponsor Attended Rain Camp Called Shot Master

Michele, I had heard that you could hide games but I don't have any people I want to hide - yet. Now I've got to figure out how to do that. I really don't have time for games - AR takes up that slice of my time :)

8:33pm • #111
125,003 Points 3 Featured Posts Localism Sponsor Outside Blog

Sharon, I agree, the games are a waste of time.  FB time is much better spent responding and commenting; forming relationships.  I do "unhide" people now and then to see if they've changed-- if not, they go back into hiding!  I want to focus on the connections I can make :-)

9:30pm • #112
JUL
19
2010

Under the FB terms and whatnot. Or you can look up FB history.  FB started out for buisnes and networking. Not for frineds to go online and see how many friends they can get and play games and post scores. However, its free, and public. and therefore,.. monkeys get on and post post post, because they can.  FB now has evolved into something else,.. and is now just a kind of phenomanon.

I mean....   cell phones are now based around FaceBook - how strange!!

...whats next I wonder?

Michael Joseph.
1:13am • #114
JUL
20
2010
125,003 Points 3 Featured Posts Localism Sponsor Outside Blog

Michael, it's a whole new world, isn't it?  The world of social media!  I'm still trying to catch up!  :)

10:16pm • #115
OCT
19
2010

Michelle,

Just a note to let you know I was thrilled to find your blog.  I have been struggling with this situation as well.  It has taken me since 1993 to create my business name and I do not believe we should play in your face marketing with our customers.  It is just not good for business. 

I hope you do not mind, I posted your link on my blog to share with my readers.  http://www.homecraftframingandgifts .  The last time I looked there were 12 comments.  If you would rather not have your link posted on my blog, just let me know and I will remove it.  Your post is well written and has a valid point.

Thank You, Dona Hepfinger  Homecraft Framing

Dona Hepfinger
7:12pm • #117
OCT
21
2010
125,003 Points 3 Featured Posts Localism Sponsor Outside Blog

Hi Dona!

I'm so glad you liked the article and I don't mind at all that you've posted the link to it!  By the way, I found your business on FB and became a fan.  I realized I actually own a couple of the prints you offer :) 

Thanks for the comment and for the "re-post!" 

Michele

 

1:40pm • #118
MAY
26

Why be 'friends' with them if you are hiding what they have to say? They obviously are reaching out wanting to talk to someone or something. It's more hurtful and a punch in the face to think that you may be hidden than to be defriended. Just my opinion and food for thought. 

Kerrie Jay
11:03pm • #119
MAY
27
125,003 Points 3 Featured Posts Localism Sponsor Outside Blog

Hi Kerrie!  If you see in the post I'm not so quick to unfriend someone.  Hiding them temporarily allows me to go in and unhide them whenever I want and then try to reconnect with them at a later time.  Sales pitches, posting quotes, constant music videos-- they're not "reaching out wanting to talk."  I'd never hide anyone who was genuinely sharing something about their lives.

4:19pm • #120
JUN
29

so what if you've done one of those (say posted a lot about something important to you) and hardly anyone interacts with you on facebook anymore... how do you get unhidden?

the hidden
1:30pm • #121
125,003 Points 3 Featured Posts Localism Sponsor Outside Blog

Hi "Hidden!"  I always periodically go in and unhide my hidden people for a bit to see if they're still posting the same things because I really to prefer to maintain a good relationship.  Not everyone does that though so it can be tough once you're the hidden one.

Remember that FB is about relationships.  You could try sending a private message to all of your friends, something like, "Hello my FB friends!  I've recently become aware that I have tended to post too much of (fill in the blank) and I apologize!  If I've annoyed you and you've hidden my posts, please give me another chance!  I value our FB friendship!"

Also, remember that FB is a give and take.  Comment on your friends' posts and take interest in what's happening in their lives.  Most will then do the same with you.  Good luck!

2:34pm • #122
JUN
30

thanks for the response! I do comment on my friends' posts whenever I can (I'm sick so I can't always, which also is one of the things I post a lot about because my disease is poorly understood and politically incorrect--patients are basically in humanitarian crisis and the situation needs outside help, but you're right that my facebook friends don't need to hear it repetitively)... I wasn't sure how people would take a message like what you suggested, but if you thought of doing that, too, it must be fine. :)

hidden
2:24am • #123
125,003 Points 3 Featured Posts Localism Sponsor Outside Blog

Hi Hidden,

My sister has been diagnosed with sarcoidosis, fibromyalgia, and chronic fatigue but most people don't even realize she's sick.  When there's an awareness month she posts it on her page but other than that she doesn't get into it a whole lot because she doesn't want to be defined by it.  

FB also offers the option to create pages for business, or causes, etc.  If there is not already one, you might consider creating one to generate awareness.  Then when outside help is needed you could post it there primarily and occasionally share it on your personal page as well. 

Hope this works for you :)

 

Michele

12:49pm • #124
JUL
01

thanks so much for all your help. those sound like a good ideas.

I hope your sister is doing reasonably well under the circumstances and is able to get appropriate medical care (I know that's sometimes tricky).

best regards

hidden
3:12am • #125
SEP
11

I recently unfriended a massive amount of people who clearly had my posts "hidden" from their feed.  I had posted that my mother had passed away suddenly and I was very sad",  and only a tiny handful of those who were still very obviously active on facebook responded.

I was very hurt to have been hidden.  I don't post a lot of status updates, photos, and NONE of those stupid meme "copy this on your status for an hour" status messages.  To only have a tiny fraction of your facebook friends express condolences when you are in shock and in the throes of grief, while the rest of them carry on with their silly viral jokes and stuff really hits you like a ton of bricks.

Why bother adding a person if you never really want to hear from them?  What is the point?  Especially if this is a person who has major issues with people "pretending" to be their friends!!!

So I seriously mass-unfriended about 78 people.  These were people who were still actively ON facebook due to lots of their own activity being posted on my feed, but the "feed reading" was not mutual.  So I decided to do them and me a favor and cut them off.  It's very telling when someone doesn't notice the major stuff.

 

 

learned the hard way
11:42am • #126

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Michele Rose, Moorestown Real Estate & Staging

Moorestown, NJ

More about me…

Prudential Fox & Roach Realtors, Rose-Colored Staging

Address: Prudential Fox & Roach Realtors, 1 West Main Street, Moorestown, NJ, 08057

Office Phone: (856) 234-0011 x 143

Cell Phone: (609) 456-5813

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