Is it the economic climate? The real estate climate? Has anyone else noticed that Seller disclosure statements seem to be getting more useful?

Back in the olden days, every time I saw a Seller's Transfer Disclosure Statement (TDS), it was like the Sellers had chosen to speak no evil, see no evil, and hear no evil about the home they were trying to sell.

Back in the olden days, I didn't know if the Sellers were even reading the TDS questions:

1. Are the fences in good condition? Yes (as they watched the fence fall down the hillside)
2. Are there any plumbing leaks? No (as they stood in ankle deep water from the dishwasher leak -- the dishwasher is an appliance, not plumbing!)
3. Do all the appliances work? Yes (the dishwasher had finished its cycle and all the water had flowed nicely over to the dining room and soaked into the carpet)
4. Do all the lights work? Yes (we are talking about electric lights, not your candles)
5. Do you have a fireplace? Yes (the bonfire in back doesn't count)
6. Is your fireplace gas, propane, or wood? Gas (as they throw another log on the fireplace -- see that gas valve right there that doesn't work?)
7. Are there any roof leaks? No (at least, not since the last time it rained a year ago)
8. Do all the windows open and close, and latch and lock? Yes (just peel these two pieces of duct tape back to take these plastic panels out....)
9. Are there any easements? Yes (go out the back gate, take the dirt trail over to John's -- he's the neighbor right there -- and his back gate is always open so you can ease right in and use his swimming pool any time)
10. What's your average monthly electric bill? Just $10 (because we're stealing electricity from the electric company and from the two houses next door since they are vacant)

Last week I had things like:

1. Are there any plumbing leaks? No, but we had a leak at the disposal in the kitchen last week. Paul McCartney at Beatles Plumbing fixed it on Tuesday, November 10. Charged us $109.79. Receipt and 90-day warranty attached.
2. Are there any roof leaks? No, but John Lennon at Ono Roofing said we need a cricket at the chimney and quoted us $550 to install one. Statement from Ono Roofing attached.

I don't know what it is -- Sellers really wanting to sell? Realtors doing a better job of counseling their Sellers on what it takes to sell? Whatever. All I know is that....

You people are going to put me out of business if you keep it up, so stop it! Now!

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