Willard Gaylin: "Expressing anger is a form of public littering..."

Hmm... Does that make me a digital litterbug? (LOL)

I am trying to let go of my anger... I have not slept well. I keep writing blogs and deleting them because I am intelligent enough to realize no good will come of it if I prematurely post them publicly while my wrath is still raging...

Lawrence J. Peter once said, "Speak when you're angry, and you'll make the best speech you'll ever regret."

I don't want to regret this... I want to help the spouse of someone that I cared about who passed away last August, but I don't know how. I tweeted a question... I tweeted a statement...  I fired off an e-mail asking a blogger at the entity for explanations and help. Now, I sit and wait for my explanations knowing that they may never come because this entity has no obligation to respond. I am not a party of record, nor do I represent the party, I just want to help the party... I sit, waiting with a disquieting pins and needle anticipation because I passed along the cell phone number of the person who needs the help, hoping he gets a helpful call... While I wait, I fret about which social media favor I'm about to cash in on behalf of another Rainer who may or may not want the blogging machine to mobilize on his behalf. I am quirky enough to mobilize the troops anyway. It's what I do. I hope I do it well...

Meddling? Yeah... How dare I? Well, why not? She wasn't one of my bay-bays, but we had an awful lot of fun together in Positive Attitude for the Weary Soul... I was there every step of the digital way and shared so many intimate moments writers and readers do when they connect and start having conversations across blogs and gradually become friends. I don't know her spouse on the same level that I knew her, but loved ones have a way of being an extension of each other. Her hubby was her best friend and she loved him more than her last breath, so how can I not meddle on behalf of the memory of a friend and good wife? 

The good will of a good spouse does not die with their death. I care about what happens to him and the only connection we have is we loved the same person...

The death of a social media friend who is your friend hurts just as much as the death of a brick and mortar... We all mourn in so many different and complicated ways... Sometimes, we can't let go of our emotional  attachments because soul ties are a very curious thing... they are hard to break and are the most treasured of our heart's possessions. When I periodically think of her, I automatically wonder about him, never hesitating to care about him simply because the process of thinking about her triggers a need to go silently lurk on their blog for an update. I want to know how he is doing and if he is okay... quietly visiting on his terms, looking forward to a word about his day, hoping and praying that he will gradually become happy again. She always wanted him to be happy, no matter what. I admired that so much about her. I also lurk because I want to hear more about my friend, who is very much loved and missed by so many people.

It is hard to write when your heart is breaking... It is hard to write when you are feeling lost... My heart is breaking because he is not okay... I am not okay with that fact. I can not escape the rage I am feeling because he did everything humanly possible to save his wife's life and stand beside her, no matter what. How can we not stand beside him?

He could better be if we help him, so I am asking you to help him. If one thousand people send him a Christmas card with $5.00 in it, it would be enough for him to redeem their house. He has lost so very much and I just can't stand seeing another good person fall... I am praying that more than one thousand people read this and that more than one thousand people send him a love gift. They lost the battle against cancer and if we do not loose the battle against our own apathy he will lose their home if no one will help him...

A redeemed house by Christmas is what I am praying for. Please pray with me. Please help me help him...

If expressing my anger about the loss of my friend and feeling so frustrated and helpless is a form of public littering, you would make this digital litterbug a very happy blogger by helping my friend survive... Show us both a kindness this Christmas by helping the hubby of a loved one. If I am going to litter cyberspace with my words, I would like to make it worthwhile...

This post is written in loving memory of Karen George.

12/16/2009 UPDATE: THE OFFICIAL Paypal email is michael@somad.org (somad stands for Save Our Mothers and Daughters).