I am watching the movie Castaway right now. This has got to be one of my favorite movies, Tom Hanks is such a great actor, this is one of those movies that anytime it's on whether it's cable or regulat tv I'll watch it. Some of the others that I feel the same about are Pretty Woman, Forest Gump, any movie in the Star Wars opus, and the list would go on and on.
Anyway, the part in the end is particularly poignant to me since it reminds me of my ex-girlfriemd from college Jennifer. Jennifer and I went out for almost 7 years and I thought that she was "the one." Although I knew she wasn't really the one, besides my marriage it was by far my longest and most dearest relationship. We met each other during our freshman year at SUNY New Paltz, I remember everything like it was yesterday. Her roommate Alpa was in my English 101 class, and she happened to live upstairs, Alpa was a little flirty but meant no harm. She invited me out to dinner, and I went--now mind you out to dinner was at the cafeteria where our meal cards worked...lol.
Anyway, I ended up back at her room as most socialization happens when in college, nothing happened but Alpa's roommate Jenn was there and when I came back to the room she excused herself and went to the tv lounge (later I would find out Jenn thought I was obnoxious--hey I am from the Bronx). I don't know why she excused herself, nothing romantic was going to happen, and in fact I never had any of "those" feelings toward Alpa in all the years I have known her.
Eventually after leaving the room I also ended up down in the tv lounge where I saw Jenn, and we just started to talk, at the time she was having problems with her boyfriend whom she had been going out with all through high school and I think previous to that also. So we talked and talked and talked and eventually when we left the tv lounge it was 6am in the morning. The time really flew, and I liked talking Jenn.
We made plans the next day to meet up and "hang," which we did. I was kind of nervous because Jenn was this stunningly GORGEOUS BLONDE girl and I was this SWARTHY Indian dude from the Bronx, how did that fly? So right away I was a little caught up in the interracial nature of any romantic relationship that would have formed. Mind you this was 1989, interracial relationships weren't as commonplace as they are now. I really liked her but I didn't know if she liked me in that way also. Turns out she did.
We had great times, for the three years she went to New Paltz, Jenn is from a small town near Binghamton named Whitney Point, she has a very close knit family and an extremely tight relationship with her Dad who was one of the coolest people I have ever met. She eventually gave in to her longing to be back with her family and went back home, I somehow think I was to blame also because our relationship did have some peaks and valleys, and the third year may have been a valley adding to her wanting to return home, I do regret this because I believe if I was more mature I wouldn't have driven her away.
We did carry on our relationship for four more years, it was tough. I would go to see her anytime I could and it was difficult for her to get away becasue she lived with her grandmother who frowned upon our relationship in general. Although she countenanced it while I was there in her home, I knew when I left Jenn took a lot of grief for me--she told me so, but we were young kids in love!
Jenn was a part of most of the important things that happened to me ealry in my life (my 20's), graduating from college, she drove cross country with me when I moved to Seattle, and one very poignant moment, when we had to get an abortion. (Now don't judge me you guys, we were 21 and had our whole life ahead of us, a child at that time was not going to be good for either one of us.) We eventually broke up after I moved back from Seattle, we were going to give it a go while out there but we both knew it was futile, and I knew it was over and I am sure she knew it was over also (girls always know).
We still email each other about two times a year, usually around the holidays and some other time--ironically the last couple of times it was while watching Castaway! lol Jenn was married and has two young boys I think they must be 10 and 12 now--I honestly don't remember. She is a very proud, doting Mom, she divorced her first husband several years ago and is getting remarried this July. I am very happy for her and very proud of her because she has just finished up school and got bachelor's degree and is working toward her master's degree. Her future husband is also a teacher and he pushed her toward teaching also, when she went to New Paltz that was her original goal to become a teacher, but unfortunately life happened.
"Anyway, I digress," as we always joked; I always think about her because whenever I see the scene where Tom Hanks goes to Kelly's house and she makes him coffee and she gives him his car back and they kiss I always feel like that moment would happen if I see Jennifer again. Then when he starts to drive off with her and she tells him "I have to go home;" it just breaks my heart, and it is so true she can't go things are just different now. Don't get me wrong I HAVE NOT been carrying a torch for her since we broke up, but she left such an indelible impression on my life that I can't even put it into words what her friendship means to me. The last time we emailed each other she remarked, that "we have know each other for over 20 years which makes me you one of my oldest and dearest frineds," which really took me aback, but it is true both ways!
I pass through Binghamton every once in a while and I usually pass by her house and her Dad's house, and then and I visit her grandmother and uncle's grave. Her uncle was a really cool dude, and although her grandmother was not crazy about me dating her granddaughter she always put on the good face for me and allowed me to stay in her home and made some really great food, boy oh boy could she cook! I would never knock on her door, or even tell her I'll be in the area only because I don't want to deal with the emotions that seeing her and holding her would evoke. I did go to her uncle's funeral and I was a wreck because I really liked him. I didn't go to her grandmother's funeral because I didn't want to deal with the emotions associated with it; I have never lost any family members other than them, and if this is any indication of how I will handle it when I lose one of my ACTUAL family members, man am I in trouble.
Anyway, thanks for reading this you guys, sorry it wasn't about real estate, but it is MY BLOG and I can write what I want to!
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