Being Positive Doesn’t Mean I Let YOU Walk All Over Me

Sally,

Refreshing post...and refreshing comments too.  BTW, I too really like your new profile picture!

One of the biggest challenges in this business is having the courage and finesse to deliver bad news and deal with difficult people.  Boundaries are so important, but so are principles!  Great post, Sally.

Sally girl......your post brought out my comments......

Boundaries.......you got to have them.....Be sweet, professional, thorough, accurate, precise, firm, open , honest and all the rest of it, but with accountability, responsibility, courtesy and manners. Since we are all the same but different........, boundaries is a way of monitoring our interaction. The best part of it is that we can modify those "borders" if and when we choose.

Thank you

     I've never connected being nice with being a anyone's doormat?   I had to read your post a couple of times to understand the connection you were making.

Bruce Bills

www.ratewindow.com

You are right.  Positive is the way to be. A doormat is not.  They definately do not go together, but positive is really much easier once you get the hang of it.

I agree.. I always tell clients upfront, " You may not like what I have to tell you at times but it's what you need to hear. I deliver good news fast and bad news even faster! Usually it's an opportunity for me to to show here's what happened and here is how we will fix it!

Great job.  Sometimes I know that my tone of voice puts people off, I try to work on that.  I really am one of the nicest people, I just SOUND mean!  Ha

sometimes when you are being nice, it seems like some think it is an open door to dish more at you...  funny how that is...

Having a positive outlook and a pleasant, honest disposition has rsulted in people coming back to me years after meeting them to buy and sell homes.  Keep working to good mojo.

Yes. Just because i'm nice doesn't mean you can use me as a doormat.

Hi Sally,  I was  once a doormat, the operative word was once! As Richie said above, knowing your  boundaries works very well. that said, ssometimes I have to bring out the velvet sledge hammer, but not very often! Time has taught me to treat every hurdle in a transaction as a speed bump, or a challenge. Never take anything personally and neverreact, I  also wait and then then respond.

Sally, excellent post!  I agree completely that being a positive person doesn't make you a doormat, nor does it imply weakness.  I do believe that those who are negative, and believe that people who are positive are either unrealistic or weak, are delusional or really have inflated sense of self.  This neither gives them the right to judge or attempt to walk over you, me or anyone else.  I really get tired of people that just want to argue!  I know a lot of people who would argue if the sky is blue or if the sun really rises in the East, who cares!  Get over it!  So if I am thought of as mindless because I choose not to be sucked into their game, I don't care!  By the way, I had an English teacher in Junior High who used to say that those that revert to "cuss" words are just too stupid to properly use the English Language.  I wish that I could say that I don't swear, but I guess that at times, I too am pretty stupid.  I just try to use it when few people are around, and certainly not in anything that is going to be a permanent reflection of myself or my profession. 

Sally ... it is a struggle to not let people walk on me in the effort to be positive!

It is unfortunate that people could mistake kindness for weakness.  I also think it's possible to be straightforward while highlighting the positive.

Sally ....great post! You are right that being nice and kind is not a weakness, it's a professional delivery of your positive attitude.

I'm one of those kinder people and I get bristly when bullies start confusing kindness and a willingness to cooperate with being weak.  I like direct and open and it nearly always is the policy that prevents hardfeelings and ill-will later.  Bullies tend not to realize how strong the rest of us are being when we stay positive and curteous.

Sally, I am new to AR and I really enjoyed reading your post & all the positive comments.  One of my favorite quotes is:  "Only the weak are cruel. Gentleness can only be expected from the strong." Leo Buscaglia.  I think this equally applies to a positive attitude. Thank you for yours.