
FEELINGS.....NOTHING MORE THAN FEELINGS
Patti @ www.SantaCruzRealEstateHomes.com
Wait a second. Let me clear my throat. Ready? Feelings...nothing more than feelings...
When I used to started to sing for a living this song was a hit. Now 30 years later I sing a lit of it to my RE buddies and a few newbies to remind them the major questions and issues that arise for them on a daily basis usually have very little to do with the technical aspects of writing a contract or understanding a 72 hour release clause or how to read a termite report or resolving an easement issue on a property. They usually have to do with emotional curveballs that their clients have thrown them. Seemingly inexplicable twists and turnarounds and perplexing jumps all over the map of the psyche while eeking through the pressures of the real estate process. What some Agents need help doing is learning the real life leitmotif of "feelings" as they relate to, revolve around and interweave with virtually every aspect of every home sale or purchase their clients make.
What I am invoking for your consideration this week is something that I have often proposed, part in jest, part in absolute seriousness. I think that all licensed residential Realtors should be required to buy or sell a home of their own (primary residence) every three years. No, it is probably not an idea that is going to get a lot of support in the State Senate and I'm pretty sure that the California Association of Realtors is going to take a pretty strong lobbying stance against it but......that sure doesn't mean that the world of real estate wouldn't be a better place if all of us Realtors were forced to experience or re-experience the roller coaster of emotions and the tedious, frustrating, esoteric processes associated with a home purchase or sale - in the same way that our clients are doing on a daily basis.
You see, we Realtors are human. And it is human nature to forget feelings over time. To look back and gloss over the difficult parts and only remember the good times. You know - sort of like one of your old flames that you remember so fondly, conveniently forgetting just how awful day to day life was with that person. How impossible a normal smooth and healthy relationship would have been? If you are in the business long enough and aren't careful enough, this tendency to forget can evolve into a very cavalier attitude. We can become jaded about other people and their concerns.
The problem is, our clients look to us for support on so many different levels. Not just our knowledge of the market, or ability to negotiate or understanding of contracts or protection against liability or advice about one of the biggest financial assets we are ever going to own. They are also looking for emotional support. A friendly ear. An empathy that acknowledges the difficulty of making a major life transition - under the best of circumstances - not to mention as in so many real estate situations - a lot less than the best of circumstances. They are hoping that we know something about - dare I say it - feelings. That we will respect their feelings. Honor them. Treat them with kindness even if they are a bit out of whack sometimes or take an occasional
dive off the deep end into the abyss.