In a recent post of mine, Kate Wheeler suggested that I might do a "Ten Commandments of Online"... which planted the seed for this post.  While I feel wholly inadequate to make a Ten Commandments for the entire internet... I'm more than willing to take on the task of creating one just for Realtors.  So without further ado... here are my Ten Commandments for Realtors.

  1. Thou art their Realtor.  Thou shall have no other Clients' interests before them.
  2. Thy name shouldst not be taken in vain, (unless, of course, I have royally screwed-up).
  3. Remember the Sunday and keep it available.  Sunday shall be reserved for open houses, and open houses only (contract writing is an acceptable substitute for Open Housing).
  4. Honour thy Client, and be fiduciary to him/her only. 
  5. Thou shalt not kill thy Client, even when you really, really, want to, nor when they really, really deserve it.
  6. Thy client shall not commit Readultery by having other Realtors than me.  If I shouldst find out about said Readultery, I mayest drop them like the proverbial hot falafel, and they couldst find themselves wandering for 40 days and 40 nights whilst searching for an honest agent.
  7. Thou shalt not steal they neighbours clients.
  8. Thou shalt not say bad things about other Realtors, nor poison the minds of their clients against them.
  9. Thou shalt not covet other Realtors clients.
  10. Thou shalt not covet thy neighbours listing.

And these words, which I offer you this day, shall be in thine heart.  Let the Board bless you and keep you - let the Board cause their faces to shine upon you and be gracious unto you - the Board raise up their commissions upon you, and give a piece.

ALAN MAY, Realtor®
Specializing in Evanston Real Estate and North Shore Real Estate
Coldwell Banker Residential Real Estate, 2929 Central Street, Evanston, IL 60201
847.425.3779      Cell: 847.924.3313      Email: Almay@aol.com
Evanston Real Estate & North Shore Real Estate • Licensed in Illinois

   

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20 Comments on Ten Commandments of Realty

JUN
15
2010
425,871 Points 4 Featured Posts Outside Blog Hit Router Called Shot Master

Thanks for the good chuckle this morning.  Amen!
10:06am • #1
818,352 Points Outside Blog Called Shot Master

I like number six.  Surprising to me still, how buyers think it is ok to work with multiple agents at same time.
10:10am • #2
109,882 Points 8 Featured Posts Called Shot Master

UUUMMMM, could you tell me my penance for violating number 5?

And, number 10?  What if I did number 5 & 10 at the same time?
10:18am • #3
880,128 Points 225 Featured Posts Outside Blog Attended Rain Camp Called Shot Master

Erika - you're entirely welcome.

Edward & Celia - and that's because we do a very bad job of explaining our value to our clients.  I don't fault the buyers... I fault the agents.

Jenna - 120 "Hail Mary's" for violating #5, and an additional 120 "our father's" for violating #10.  If you do them simultaneously... I can't be held accountable.  (Mea Culpa, mea culpa, mea maxima culpa)
11:04am • #4
109,882 Points 8 Featured Posts Called Shot Master

Actually, that seems kinda...WORTH IT!

BBBBBBAAAAAHHHHAAA!
11:13am • #5
237,828 Points 5 Featured Posts Outside Blog

I can live without the Board shining their faces on me as long as my clients don't commit readultery.
11:13am • #6
880,128 Points 225 Featured Posts Outside Blog Attended Rain Camp Called Shot Master

Jenna - only you can make that decision if you want to cross that line, my child (making hand motions in the air).

Robin - I know... Readultery is a cardinal sin.  What will the children think?
11:27am • #7
851,625 Points 183 Featured Posts Attended Rain Camp Called Shot Master

And may the "Board" bless you and keep you safe from  "thinful" commissions!
4:35pm • #8
1,519,849 Points 112 Featured Posts Localism Sponsor Outside Blog Called Shot Master

Alan:  This is very cute.  These are commandments I already follow, so I can really get behind them.  Love your sense of humor.
5:54pm • #9
117,447 Points Called Shot Master

I see my good friend Chris Ann Cleland precedes me.  This really does have me reflecting on some interesting moments in my real estate career.
6:18pm • #10
451,140 Points 10 Featured Posts Outside Blog Called Shot Master

Nicely done, Alan! How soon can we expect to see the next two obvious entries in this trilogy: The Buyer's 10 Commandments, and The Seller's 10 Commandments?
6:40pm • #11
880,128 Points 225 Featured Posts Outside Blog Attended Rain Camp Called Shot Master

Karen - you know you can never be too thinful, nor to richful.

Chris - and you're really good for my ego... bless you and go and sin no more.

Anne - and we'd love to hear about some of them.

Pat & Wayne - uh, oh... more fodder for the blog.
9:14pm • #12
JUN
16
2010
549,739 Points 36 Featured Posts Localism Sponsor Outside Blog Hit Router

LOL --Alan!  Thanks for a great way of putting this.  I am sure you are working on The Buyer's and The Seller's 10 Commandments.  This one should be a great hit.
10:59am • #13
880,128 Points 225 Featured Posts Outside Blog Attended Rain Camp Called Shot Master

Lizette - you are right.. I'm working on them.  Stay tuned.
11:46am • #14
762,298 Points 69 Featured Posts Outside Blog Attended Rain Camp Called Shot Master

Um, do I hear a ten commandments echo in here? 
4:45pm • #15
880,128 Points 225 Featured Posts Outside Blog Attended Rain Camp Called Shot Master

Jane - I saw that... and now I'm working on the 10C's for buyers and sellers...  great minds think alike, and ours do too.
4:57pm • #16
JUN
17
2010
383,498 Points 8 Featured Posts Localism Sponsor Attended Rain Camp Called Shot Master

Cute but some of those will be just as hard to keep as the real thing: especially when its deserving. Looking forward to the buyers and sellers list.
12:51am • #17
880,128 Points 225 Featured Posts Outside Blog Attended Rain Camp Called Shot Master

Teral - I'll accept "cute".
8:53am • #18
JUN
18
2010
520,570 Points 25 Featured Posts Localism Sponsor Outside Blog Hit Router Attended Rain Camp Called Shot Master

Alan,

 

I get really tempted to do #5 but haven't yet.  Hey how about if it is someone else's client and not mine????
1:47pm • #19
880,128 Points 225 Featured Posts Outside Blog Attended Rain Camp Called Shot Master

Larry - still tempting, but .... uh.... no!
3:07pm • #20


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Alan May, Coldwell Banker Realtor® Evanston, Illinois & Northern Suburbs

Evanston, IL

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Address: Attn: Alan May, Realtor®, 2929 Central Street, Evanston, IL, 60201

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