Listen at the Emotional Level

Have you ever sat in on a conversation with another agent and a prospect, and the agent was saying things that you knew were a bit offensive to the prospect?  Many people just railroad over prospects or clients in their conversations, instead of listening at the emotional level and picking up on what someone really is saying or feeling.  

One of the quickest ways to build rapport with someone is to be sensitive to this emotional level, and feed the other person's needs, not your own.  We fail to do that when we are trying to feed our own ego, our need for attention and approval.  I believe life is about relationships.  Everything else could go, but not our relationships.  

Next time you have a conversation with someone, anyone, use subtle questions to get them to talk about what is important to them.  Listen, and instead of answering or telling your own war stories, gently pry more out of him or her.  Let that person share whatever it is he/she wants to talk about.  Do this and when he/she gets up to leave, he/she will thank you, and you will have done more for that person than anything else you could have wisely tried to say. 

Really.  I promise. 

 

7 Comments on Listen at the Emotional Level

Great reminder.  Learning to just listen was a hard thing for me.  For some reason I like to open my mouth and put my foot in it way too often :)

08/16/2007 01:32 AM by Ahwatukee Real Estate Expert, Dawn Workman, MBA (DPR Realty, LLC)

I have actually done that and was appalled at what I hear. I am surprised that some people are even employed. What likely happens is that the consumer thinks this is normal. They would be wrong of course but it is sad that they believe this is the way it has to be.

08/16/2007 01:37 AM by San Diego Real Estate Voice authored by William Johnson GRI CRS e-PRO (RE/MAX Associates)

Listing is a very important skill and one that we all need to do more often ~ regardless of how well or how much we already do it.

08/16/2007 01:45 AM by Bob & Carolin Benjamin - E Phoenix Arizona Real Estate (The Benjamin Team - Keller Williams Integrity First Realty )

Chuck - couldn't have said it better myself!  I remember from a psych class years ago, if you just listen, ask necessary questions, and the wait for an answer, most people are forthcoming.  Even if you get that akward silence, wait it out and the other person will respond.

08/16/2007 01:48 AM by Sandy Noll - Realtor, eAgent (Keller Williams Realty Kirkland)

I've been a pretty good listener, but we all could use this reminder. Thanks.

08/16/2007 03:57 AM by Danielle V. Lewis - DDR Realty (DDR Realty)

It does work, and it really builds that relationship quickly.  If they know you really listen, they feel comfortable with you and then they feel comfortable enough to work with you.

08/16/2007 06:01 AM by Bradenton Real Estate - Linda Reynolds

So true!

Everyone likes to feel important.  There is nothing worse than having a conversation with someone who won't let you get a word in. When they finally do, they don't respond to what you've said, they continue on with what they were talking about before you "interrupted".

08/16/2007 01:42 PM by Deb Johnson~Farmington Hills real estate RE/MAX Farmington Hills, MI (RE/MAX New Trend)

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