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Where We Dwell

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Real Estate Agent

This home we don't purchase, rent or lease, but nonetheless, some of us at some point in life may find ourselves in need of.  These homes are nursing or care homes.

Having a friend find her 27 year old Type I Diabetic daughter unconscious and unresponsive in late May, brought all this up close and personal.  In days following the initial event, the daughter was released from hospital intensive care unit, and quickly moved to a nursing care facility without family input as to choice.  That's when things became frightening and interesting.

It was discovered this particular nursing home is an overall two star rating, with a one star rating for health inspections.  One star is much below standard.  Two stars is below standard.

How many of you know that nursing and care homes have a star ranking system, which is available for viewing on the top page of the Medicare.gov website?  I didn't.

In this case, the nursing home is part of a chain across several states, which also has a symbiotic relationship to a ventilator company, which they lease beds to.  The nursing home provides the nursing care, billing, and other business related functions.  The ventilator company provides the ventilators and respiratory therapists.

Things began to deteriorate when an employee of the ventilator company jumped before a judge to procure representative/guardianship of my friend's daughter, rather than the mother and family. 

Rather than attempt to continue weaning the patient away from the ventilator, they instead increased the usage to 24 hours a day.

In addition to other frightening care neglect, she developed bedsores so severe they were bleeding.   Once she significantly worsened, she was sent back to a regular hospital, where staff was shocked at the condition she had arrived in.  She has currently been off the ventilator for a few weeks now.  She continues to make slow progress in recovering from a stroke.  We would appreciate any special thoughts and prayers for her recovery.

While you consider writing a Living Will documenting your wishes in the event you become incapacitated, or unable to make important decisions about your care, it is also vital that you inform family members about resources where they can gain insight on making wise selections and decisions to best care for you.

As much as I realize this consideration of homes which we may dwell within a lifetime, isn't normally in our thoughts, I feel it important enough to convey, so folks become informed about these facilities, while making choices about the selection of them.  What have I learned from all this - It adds new dimension to that bumper sticker stating, "Be kind to your kids, they may choose your nursing home one day."

Posted by

Myrl Jeffcoat ActiveRain Signature
  

Comments (20)

Andrea Swiedler
Berkshire Hathaway HomeServices New England Properties - New Milford, CT
Realtor, Southern Litchfield County CT

Myrl, you have hit a sore subject within my family. My oldest daughter is a nurse, her job in a local nursing home is director of staff development. Her nursing home ranks 4 out of 5 stars in all areas. She works very hard to keep everyone up to date and educated on how to do everything.

There are some good ones out there, and sometimes they are a necessary evil. But things are looking grim for nursing homes on the whole. There are some pretty screwy ideas Medicare has either put in place or wants to put in place about pay scales, etc. which may shut many down.

I hope I never have to go. But there may be a time when my family can't do it. Then what do you do?

It is imperative that family check out the ratings of nursing homes before placing someone there.

Jul 24, 2010 04:30 PM
Roger D. Mucci
Shaken...with a Twist 216.633.2092 - Euclid, OH
Lets shake things up at your home today!

How very sad for your friend and her daughter..............they will be in my thoughts and prayers.

Jul 24, 2010 04:40 PM
Myrl Jeffcoat
Sacramento, CA
Greater Sacramento Realtor - Retired

Andrea - Thank you for your input on this important topic.  After this incident with my friend's family, I immediately checked the rankings of two local care homes to me.  I have had friends in both, who were very satisfied with their care.  Both these homes received 4 and 5 stars in most areas.  It put into perspective the 1 and 2 stars of the case I document in the story above.  

Nursing is a calling, almost more than it is a profession.  Knowing you, I suspect your daughter is exceptional in her position.

Jul 24, 2010 04:41 PM
Myrl Jeffcoat
Sacramento, CA
Greater Sacramento Realtor - Retired

Roger - Thank you for your thoughts and prayers. . .They are appreciated greatly!

Jul 24, 2010 04:43 PM
William Johnson
Retired - La Jolla, CA
Retired

Wow Myrl, What a story. This sounds like the nightmare I have heard spoken of tied to UHC. But that isn't even in effect as yet and this story should put the fear associated with it into a perspective people can understand if it isn't handled correctly. Bureaucrats doing health care certainly doesn't sound too good to me.  This is so very sad that a family and patient would be so mistreated.

My young nephew and name sake was diagnosed with childhood diabetes. He was a young man. He lived alone and  he had an incident at night , fell to floor and was found 3 days later when he didn't show up for work.

Your post is a real heart breaker and those acquainted with Diabetes and other catastrophic diseases will really understand what you are saying. I can't even begin to imagine what this family and the daughter have gone through. I am just stunned that such things can happen in this day and age and yet realistic enough to know that they certainly do and all too frequently no doubt.

Jul 24, 2010 07:31 PM
Jim Hale
ACTIONAGENTS.NET - Eugene, OR
Eugene Oregon's Best Home Search Website

Among the many things wrong about America is the way we shunt elders aside and have specialists "take care of" them.

Jul 24, 2010 07:32 PM
William Johnson
Retired - La Jolla, CA
Retired

Myrl, I came back to tell you that I recommended this post for feature. What a well told story of how this family was so amazingly mistreated.

Jul 24, 2010 07:40 PM
Myrl Jeffcoat
Sacramento, CA
Greater Sacramento Realtor - Retired

William - I am grateful that you have recommended this story for "Feature" status.  I am hopeful that it reaches enough eyes, that someone can make a difference.  As much as I tend to agree that bureaucrats doing health care doesn't sound good, I'm not exhilarated by having healthcare for profit either.  Especially, when shortcuts in care to create that profit become the norm.  It is indeed a very heartbreaking story!

Jim - You are so right about shunting elders aside!  In this particular case, the daughter was living with the mother, who has helped provide excellent care.  Currently she is with the daughter at the care home most of the day, helping to oversee her care.  The mother also has her own health issues, which adds to the magnitude of the situation.

Jul 24, 2010 08:02 PM
Barbara-Jo Roberts Berberi, MA, PSA, TRC - Greater Clearwater Florida Residential Real Estate Professional
Charles Rutenberg Realty - Clearwater, FL
Palm Harbor, Dunedin, Clearwater, Safety Harbor

Your friend and her daughter are indeed in our prayers! It is a shame that institutions like this exist!

Jul 25, 2010 07:44 AM
Myrl Jeffcoat
Sacramento, CA
Greater Sacramento Realtor - Retired

Barbara-Jo - Thank you so much!

For those with family members with Type I diabetes my friend's daugher was lined up to particpate in Phase II for the clinical trial for Type I with the Faustman Labs at Harvard. Her new appt is next Apil. Her mother is not cancelling it yet. This cure is non-invasive and is the only one that will take a long-term diabetic. There is hope, and her daughter wanted other diabetics to find hope for living free of the disease.

Jul 25, 2010 08:28 AM
Elizabeth Weintraub Sacramento Broker
Elizabeth Anne Weintraub, Broker - Sacramento, CA
Put 40 years of experience to work for you

What a story, Myrl. I didn't know that nursing homes have star ratings. But that is exactly what I used to threaten my mother with when I was a kid and she annoyed me.

Jul 25, 2010 08:57 AM
Kathy Streib
Cypress, TX
Home Stager/Redesign

Myrl- I am so sorry for your friend and, of course, for her daughter.  My husband and I have been fortunate in that his mother researched adult care facilities when she still was very capable.  She then moved into one on her own because she did not want her children to have to make the decision.  In the years since she has been in one, she has progressed into total care.  I am so thankful everyday that she made her choice because I know this is where she chose to be.

Jul 25, 2010 09:53 AM
Myrl Jeffcoat
Sacramento, CA
Greater Sacramento Realtor - Retired

Elizabeth - I have seen how you treat your cats, who are living in the lap of luxury.  I doubt any threats made to your mother when you were a kid, would have been believed or taken seriously:-)

Kathy - Your mother's actions in regard to her care were so fortunate for your family.  I'm glad it worked out so well for all of you.

Jul 25, 2010 11:13 AM
ASHEVILLE REALTY REFERRAL RESOURCE 828-776-0779
REAL ESTATE REFERRAL NETWORK - Asheville, NC
CONTACT janeAnne365@gmail.com

Myrl~

Having spent months preparing for and selecting a rehab facility for my Dad after a stoke left him paralyzed, I am very aware of this difficult subject. Our family members stayed with Dad while he was there. We converged on the facility to help feed him breakfast, and someone was there with him for all meals and until bedtime. Soon the nurses and staff realized that he was to be handled with dignity and care. And soon he came home with us where we were able to provide quality of life for him.

But so many patients do not have family and friends nearby.

I admire the way you tackle this story. THANK YOU!

Jul 25, 2010 02:18 PM
Myrl Jeffcoat
Sacramento, CA
Greater Sacramento Realtor - Retired

JaneAnne - I am convinced your family's way of assisting with your dad's care is the only way to go -if it is possible.  We have done that in our family as well. 

I think it helps for care home staff to see family oversight, input and assistance with care.  I also think it helps speed healing in many instances, so your family member can come home sooner, if it is in the realm of reality.  Thank you for sharing your story..

Jul 25, 2010 03:34 PM
Bruce Walter
Keller Williams Realty Lafayette/West Lafayette, Indiana - West Lafayette, IN

Hi Myrl, thanks for talking about this tough issue.  Both my parents died in a nursing home, and I have mixed feelings on the care they received.  It helps if the kids live nearby so they can bridge the gap and stand in as an advocate when things aren't being done as they should.  I couldn't imagine what it would be like to have a loved one on the other side of the country in a nursing home.  In our area the choices are limited due to a shortage of nursing care beds available.

Jul 26, 2010 02:45 AM
Nick T Pappas
Assoc. Broker ABR, CRS, SFR, e-Pro, @Homes Realty Group, Broker/Providence Property Mgmnt, LLC Huntsville AL - Huntsville, AL
Madison & Huntsville Alabama Real Estate Resource

Myrl, my best to your friends daughter.  I have an aunt in a nursing home so I decided to go to medicare.gov to check out it's rating.  Overall the rating was pretty good, but I was a little disappointed that a fair amount of the rating came from the nursing home self-reporting some of the data used.  Still, it's good info to know.

Jul 26, 2010 07:35 AM
Maya Thomas, Broker
Tampa, FL
Please see my client recommendations.

My heart and prayers are going out to you, your friend and your friend's daughter.  What a horrifying experience.  I'm so sorry that you are all going through this.

We've got to figure out a better alternative to a nursing home.  If young kids in ever community could donate an hour or two a week we could breath some energy, optimism, enthusiasm and love into a very sad place.  It would be good for the kids and our loved ones who are in nursing homes.  It would also encourage our kids to get involved with good nutrition and exercise so they can be as healthy as possible to lead a better life.  Volunteering may be the most rewarding thing a person can do in life.

Jul 26, 2010 08:49 AM
Maya Thomas, Broker
Tampa, FL
Please see my client recommendations.

My heart and prayers are going out to you, your friend and your friend's daughter.  What a horrifying experience.  I'm so sorry that you are all going through this.

We've got to figure out a better alternative to a nursing home.  If young kids in ever community could donate an hour or two a week we could breath some energy, optimism, enthusiasm and love into a very sad place.  It would be good for the kids and our loved ones who are in nursing homes.  It would also encourage our kids to get involved with good nutrition and exercise so they can be as healthy as possible to lead a better life.  Volunteering may be the most rewarding thing a person can do in life.

Jul 26, 2010 08:50 AM
Myrl Jeffcoat
Sacramento, CA
Greater Sacramento Realtor - Retired

Bruce - In our family there was a grandmother that was in a nursing home longterm (she was blind, and had suffered a broken hip and could not walk.  She was content at the home, and received good care.  We visited often.  I also had a father-in-law with lung cancer,that spent his last few weeks in one.  We were with him nearly 24/7.  From my experience, I feel it is vital to have a family member in close proximity to the care home.

Nick - I suspect that the rating system has some short comings; but I'm glad there is at least some tool in place to start with.

Maya - I agree with you about getting kids involved in nursing home volunteerism.  We see a little of that at our local nursing home, and I think it's wonderful.

Jul 26, 2010 10:32 AM