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Last Thoughts about Dropping Kristofer off to CSU

By Cherise Selley

Real Estate Broker/Owner with Selley Group Real Estate, LLC

August 21, 2010 12:44 PM

Sometimes the answers about our times of anguish goes much deeper, not to touch the pain about what our human hearts experience, but to help us to understand the deeper questions about what we’re going through on this journey of life.

The last few days have been difficult for me due to separation anxiety as this applies to having both of my sons now attending Colorado State University. The house seems eerily empty.

While the pain was intense to drop my youngest (Kristofer) off for college, I did experience some strong realizations about the process.

First, it’s been a real privilege to be Kristofer’s mother. He’s been a wonderful gift from God. Yet, this time has opened my eyes to the realization that he is not entirely mine. Kristofer is God’s. And now, I’m excited for this new journey to trust in God further to mold our family into a new shape during our embolden walk of faith.

Kristofer is doing great so far. He loved the journalism orientation, as he can already put to use his experience with our office, including the production of the neighborhood videos, as well as his experience with promotional marketing and advertisement writing. For this, I am very thankful. I’m also thankful that he is attending a great university, and has a compatible roommate, as well as having his older brother, Jake, in Ft. Collins, who will graduate this December.

Right now, I’m just absorbing the entirety of what has just happened. I get overwhelming waves of loneliness and emptiness, and then I allow myself to really feel this. Then after a few moments, I seriously contemplate the truth about it all, counting everything with an attitude of thanksgiving. Think and feel, is allowing me to get through this grief, and is really giving me strength to carry out a new strategy with Gordon in our marriage.

By Monday, I think I will be prepared for this last upcoming quarter of business. Hope you all had a good weekend.

Feel free to contact Colorado Springs CO Realtor, Cherise Selley at Selley Group Real Estate, LLC: 2139 Chuckwagon Rd, Ste 210 - Colorado Springs, Colorado 80919 - 719. 598. 5101

Portions of this article are written by Gordon, as framed by the expressed opinions of Cherise, but not proofread.

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Tish Lloyd

BlueCoast Realty Corporation - Wilmington, NC

Broker - Wilmington NC and Surrounding Beaches

Cherise: Your grief, loneliness and fear for Kristofer will very quickly give way to your pride, joy and relief in knowing that you have given him every opportunity to have a successful, full life. You have been given wonderful sons as gifts and now you are trusting them to God and allowing them to grow. Your heart will be filled up, pressed down and running over.

Aug 21, 2010 01:08 PM

Cherise Selley

Selley Group Real Estate, LLC - Colorado Springs, CO

Colorado Springs Realtor

Elyse,

I'm actually excited for Kris, especially since hearing the enthusiasm in his voice since he got to CSU.

Aug 21, 2010 01:39 PM

Cherise Selley

Selley Group Real Estate, LLC - Colorado Springs, CO

Colorado Springs Realtor

Sheldon,

Thanks. He's already made me proud of who he is on the inside of his heart. Kris is very smart and know he'll do well. I'm just going to miss him.

Aug 21, 2010 01:40 PM

Cherise Selley

Selley Group Real Estate, LLC - Colorado Springs, CO

Colorado Springs Realtor

Thanks Tish, sister in Christ. Gordon and I are trusting in God over our two young men.

Aug 21, 2010 01:41 PM

Marchel Peterson

Results Realty - Spring, TX

Spring TX Real Estate E-Pro

Cherise, I had a step-nephew who went to CSU. It is a great University! It has been 6 years since our youngest flew the coop but he did it joining the Army. It was a TOTAL shock as he was gone for almost 5 years. He lived with us for a short time when he got out but now is just a short 20 minutes away. I think I told you he just started Texas A&M but is mainly commuting. He is now 25 and not in to the Aggie experience he just wants to get his degree.

Aug 21, 2010 03:19 PM

Wayne Johnson

Coldwell Banker D'Ann Harper REALTORS® - San Antonio, TX

San Antonio REALTOR, San Antonio Homes For Sale

Cherise,

I too remember when our last child went off to college. The house was quiet like it had never been before when the kids were around. I used to remember how much noise two kids, a wife, and a dog could make. Then, when the kids were gone such quiet. Look at it this way instead of working half a day now (8AM to 8PM) you can work even later everyday. (joke)

Aug 21, 2010 03:54 PM

Marilyn Boudreaux

Marilyn Boudreaux, Century 21 Bono Realty - Lake Charles, LA

Lake Charles LA Century 21 Realtor

What a great post to share with us. My daughter just graduated from college here last December, I did a big whew after I cried at graduation! College is such an exciting time where our children really spread wings

Aug 21, 2010 05:15 PM

Debe Maxwell, CRS

Savvy + Company (704) 491-3310 - Charlotte, NC

The RIGHT CHARLOTTE REALTOR!

Hi Cherise, I sit here with tears in my eyes as I share your painful joy. It's so hard to miss them physically and to simultaneously realize that they've grown up and you're so very proud of them. You've armed them with everything that they need to be successful in life--Kris is going to be just fine!

Remember you and Gordon were as one--then God gave you two beautiful children to get through the stages in life that they could not have managed on their own. Now, they can--with you and Gordon as their 'consultants!' You and G now have each other- focus on your union and your bond will grow even stronger than before.

Hugs (and shared tissue too!)

Aug 21, 2010 05:17 PM

Gary Woltal

Keller Williams Realty - Flower Mound, TX

Assoc. Broker Realtor SFR Dallas Ft. Worth

Hi Cherise, definitely a transition period for you and your husband. Just celebrate it rather than think of the separation anxiety... it is all good.

Aug 21, 2010 05:36 PM

Mary Douglas

United Country Ponderosa Realty, Red Feather Lakes, Colorado - Red Feather Lakes, CO

REALTOR, Red Feather Lakes, Colorado

Hi Cherise, Thank goodness there are telephones, text and email so that you can stay in touch when you are missing Kris. He sounds like a bright young man with a good head on his shoulders -- you will both enjoy this new stage and growth in your life. I noticed Fort Collins was super crowded today now that all the students are back! Take Care Cherise, all will be well. :-)

Aug 21, 2010 05:40 PM

Marchel Peterson

Results Realty - Spring, TX

Spring TX Real Estate E-Pro

Cherise, As I see the comments coming in I've been thinking of your lonely nest. I know it is hard but sn't it good to know that God is in control. That gives me a peace that nothing else does.

Aug 22, 2010 02:12 AM

Charlottesville Solutions

Charlottesville Solutions - Charlottesville, VA

I can only imagine....

we still have 2 at home and it will not be long

your friend in Charlottesville

Aug 22, 2010 02:45 AM

Ron and Alexandra Seigel

Napa Consultants - Carpinteria, CA

Luxury Real Estate Branding, Marketing & Strategy

Cherise and Gordon,

Congratulations to both of you, and I really enjoyed reading your emotional and ultimately joyous conclusion to Kristofer's journey. I appreciate your voice for its singularity and authenticity. It is so wonderful to be inspired by both of you. Happy Sunday!

Aug 22, 2010 04:29 AM

Kathleen Daniels, Probate & Trust Specialist

KD Realty - 408.972.1822 - San Jose, CA

Probate Real Estate Services

Cherise, This brought tears to my eyes. How blessed are we to feel the deep love and joy we feel? You and Gordon get to be a couple again – How cool is that? I wish you continued happiness and success!

Aug 22, 2010 04:51 AM

Cherise Selley

Selley Group Real Estate, LLC - Colorado Springs, CO

Colorado Springs Realtor

YOU ALL, Thanks for your supportive comments and I do appreciate your words to bring comfort. And yes, I realize the new steps ahead, and Gordon and I took some today...

Aug 22, 2010 01:06 PM

Pippa Mac

Chevaux Group Realtor, The Woodlands and Spring - The Woodlands, TX

The Woodlands TX Real Estate

I couldn't read this without crying!!!! I am a few years away from this but ... ughhh, I know it will be sooo difficult! xoxo pippa

Aug 24, 2010 09:54 AM

Cherise Selley

Selley Group Real Estate, LLC - Colorado Springs, CO

Colorado Springs Realtor

Pippa,

It hasn't been a week yet, and now I'm starting to feel the fatigue from the post-stress.

Aug 24, 2010 10:00 AM

Mario Jannatpour

RE/MAX Alliance in Louisville, Colorado - Louisville, CO

Author of the Book, "The Honest Real Estate Agent"

Hi Cherise! I was touched by your post. One day I'll be feeling the pain you are now. I have two Daughters, 7 and 4, and time will go by and then they'll be in college.

Here's a lighthearted article about Parents taking their children to College--I hope it makes you smile.

http://www.nytimes.com/2010/08/23/education/23college.html?_r=1&src=me&ref=homepage

Thanks,

Mario

Aug 26, 2010 02:48 AM

Amy Ballain

Red Door Group - Keller Williams Avenues - Broomfield, CO

Great post! I grew up in Fort Collins and know he will love it there. My oldest started middle school in Broomfield this week and that was hard. You are so right about our children not being ours but God's. :)

Aug 26, 2010 05:16 AM

Cherise Selley

Selley Group Real Estate, LLC - Colorado Springs, CO

Colorado Springs Realtor

Thanks Amy and Mario...

Aug 26, 2010 05:42 AM

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