My Friend Burt: A Life Lived Well

My friend Burt died earlier this week.  I'd known him for 20 years, and he taught me some life lessons that I hold dear to my heart: service to others and humility.

The world we live places great value on achievement and acquisition.  We are often judged by what we have, not by who we are.  Burt did not die rich....far from it.  He did not die with many material possessions.  He didn't die with personalized licence plates on his car...he didn't even own a car.  He didn't have the latest big screen hi-def tv.  He lived at home with his parents during his last 10 years as his health deteriorated: diabetes, dialysis, heart problems....far too many ills to catalogue here.  And constant pain.

What Burt did have was a desire and an ability to help others, in this case recovering alcoholics.  Burt was one himself, sober for 20 years.  He showed them by his words and by his example how to lead a better, sober life.  He saved a number of lives.  That's quite a testimonial for a life lived well.

In the past few years, Burt came to meetings in a wheelchair.  Men he sponsored got him to the meetings.  It obviously was not easy for him to get there, given his pain.  However, Burt always put other people ahead of himself and his pain.  He was always there for others, no matter what his circumstances.

Burt never bragged about the lives he saved or the difference he made in hundreds of others.  He was humble.  He just went about his work....saving lives and asking for nothing in return.

I learned great lessons from my friend Burt, from his works and from his humility.  I will miss him, but his lessons will live on in me and in countless others.

Not a bad legacy, Burt!

It's a beautiful, somewhat sad night here on the lake in Reston...hope it's a beautiful day/night wherever you are, too!

 

19 Comments on My Friend Burt: A Life Lived Well

A great personal story Allen and I am so glad you shared it. Burt's legacy is rich in one of life's most admired qualities. Passion.

08/31/2007 07:48 PM by San Diego Real Estate Voice authored by William Johnson GRI CRS e-PRO (RE/MAX Associates)


Condolences Allen. It sounds as if he had a life well lived and a legacy that will live on!

08/31/2007 08:05 PM by Chris Tesch College Station, Texas Real Estate (RE/MAX Bryan College Station)


Allen,

I don't know you, but your pain reaches out. I am sorry to hear about your friend dying. You say he did not die rich. I say he was very rich to have a friend that misses him so much. We all make our choices on how to relate in this world. He made his choice to be a good friend and from this you learn to do the same. Peace!

08/31/2007 08:06 PM by Karen Hurst ~ Real Estate Broker ~ Warwick ~ Rhode Island (Storm Realty LLC)


My thoughts and prayers are with you. 

08/31/2007 08:11 PM by Bradenton Real Estate - Linda Reynolds


Hi Allen,

I'm very sorry to hear of Burt's passing, however I am very glad that he walked amongst us and added so much light while he was here.

I have a cousin who had a major heart attack last night...only 51 years old...he was an alcoholic for many years (even though he was a brilliant man and had dropped out of law school when young)and had just gotten his life back straightened around after going through a long rehab program. At this point we don't know if he has major brain damage or not...he is in an induced coma after having had major surgery today.

Your post hit home for me due to the person you described Burt as being, and because my cousin is a very special person too.... 

thanks for your beautiful writing...I am subscribing to your blog. It's a beautiful, though sad night here on the Bay in Belleville, Ontario too...thank you

Jo 

08/31/2007 08:17 PM by Jo-Anne Smith-Belleville, Quinte and Prince Edward Region Real Estate, Ont. (Royal Lepage Proalliance Realty, Brokerage)


Thoughts and Prayers.  Good people live on in the hearts of the people they touched.

08/31/2007 08:18 PM by Andrew Clemente - Mortgages Made Easy, Inc


A great tribute to your friend, Allen. I know you'll miss him. Here's a big hug.

08/31/2007 10:08 PM by Sharon Simms St Pete Florida CRS CIPS CLHMS (RE/MAX Metro)


That was a beautiful tribute for a dear friend.  Writing about him, thinking of him and sharing what you have learned through him will keep him with you always.  My condolences to you and Burt's family.  May he rest in peace.

Michelle

08/31/2007 10:31 PM by Michelle Skinner, Realtor, e-Pro (Exit Realty Oceanside)


The real mark of a life well lived is the legacy that lives after.  I think in Burt's Case there are many that carry his legacy with them through each of their days.  Thanks for sharing his story.

09/01/2007 04:00 AM by Darrel Quebedeaux (Evergreen Realty & Associates Inc.)


Allen - my thoughts and prayers are with you and Burt's family and friends.  Clearly he was a great man and lived a life that has a legacy that will live on.  Thanks for sharing this story with us.

Jo-Anne - many thoughts and prayers for your cousin's recovery with no brain damage incurred.

Ann

09/01/2007 09:13 AM by Portsmouth NH Real Estate ~ Ann Cummings (RE/MAX Coast to Coast - Portsmouth New Hampshire)


Jo-Anne, my prayers are with your cousin a well!  Hopefully he will pull through with no major after effects!

09/01/2007 12:52 PM by Chris Tesch College Station, Texas Real Estate (RE/MAX Bryan College Station)



Jo-Anne:  You know my prayers are with you and your cousin.  Alcoholism is a nasty disease, one which affects one's health as well as his/her relations with family and others.  I hope that your cousin pulls through and gets to lead a productive, sober life!

Sharon: Thanks for the hug, m'dear...You Da Best!  And I hope that you know what an inspiration you have been to me, both as a CyberStar(r) and as a person.

It's a beautiful fall-like day here on the lake in Reston...hope it's a beautiful day/evening wherever you are, too!

 

Life's Important Moments...Cherish Them! 

09/01/2007 01:03 PM by Allen F. Hainge, CRS (AFH Seminars)


Allen, Ann and Chris,  Thanks for the kind words with regards to my cousin.....they are still keeping him in an induced coma and now say he suffered major heart damage and are do not know anything yet with regards to brain damage...

Allen, I love the picutures you post and your profile pic...it's a beautiful evening here in Belleville...sunny and cool.  Thanks

Jo 

09/01/2007 05:56 PM by Jo-Anne Smith-Belleville, Quinte and Prince Edward Region Real Estate, Ont. (Royal Lepage Proalliance Realty, Brokerage)


I'm glad you wee able to provide a tribute to your friend Burt.  It is so valuable for all of us to hear that testimony.

09/02/2007 03:26 AM by Don Diltz (Coldwell Banker)


Allen, I'm sorry for your loss that is a very nice tribute to your friend.

09/26/2007 12:55 AM by David Matney, CRS - Omaha, NE Real Estate (Alliance Real Estate)


God knows great hearts best.  He invented them and he breaks the mold after each one. Thank you Allen for sharing Burt with us. 

09/26/2007 02:12 AM by William Boughton (Old Republic Title and escrow of Hawaii )


Sorry for your loss and the loss of Burt's friends.  Thanks for memorializing him and sharing.

09/26/2007 09:51 AM by Don Diltz (Coldwell Banker)


Sorry to hear of the loss of a dear friend. I know what it is like to have someone dear to you pass on- My thoughts are with you-

09/26/2007 09:53 AM by Barbara-Jo & Bill - - Florida Realty Professional - AHWD (Charles Rutenberg Realty)


Hey Allen, Come back and bring more here to AR. Always love your perspective and wonderful insight.

10/08/2007 11:54 PM by San Diego Real Estate Voice authored by William Johnson GRI CRS e-PRO (RE/MAX Associates)


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Real Estate Trainer: Allen F.  Hainge, CRS (AFH Seminars)
Allen F. Hainge, CRS
Reston, VA
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Tips, Techniques and networking ideas from one of real estate's premier technology/marketing trainers and speakers. Allen learns from the CyberStars(r) (www.CyberStars.net) and shares his knowledge with you.

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