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Fan Mail

By
Home Inspector with Jay Markanich Real Estate Inspections, LLC 3380-000723

Hi, Billy Jays here!

As a prominent, and popular, inventor and media marketer, I get a lot of fan mail!

And why not?  My products are everywhere, of excellent quality and timely.

One of the reasons they are so timely is because of excellent suggestions that I receive from my clients, and fans!

I have to say, I always take these suggestions seriously.

And, thinking all the time, I take advantage of the best things I hear.

For example, just a few days ago, a friend of mine was bitten by a dog.  And he was contacted by someone who's name is not in front of me, but I remember it as being Jimbo Quintillio.

Jimbo had an excellent suggestion.  My friend has a penchant, a talent really, for being bitten by dogs.  So Jimbo suggested that my friend carry dog chews with him to give to dogs before they had the notion to bite him.

His suggestion:  "You obviously had her favorite bone. The one in your hand :) Boy Jay you have got to have the worst luck with dogs of anyone I know. Over a hundred bites! They should make a Markanich doggie chew toy. I'm sure it would be a big hit. Sounds like a job for Billy Jays."

Well Mr. Quintillio, and can I call you Jim because Jimbo sounds so, well, formal?  Jim, that suggestion hit me between the eyes! 

My product development team (me) got right on it.  We decided on the chew toy appearance (me).  We sent it to costume design (me) to dress the chew toys.  We had shipping (me) design the shipping bags and number per bag (me).  And we had marketing (me) come up with a name.  Product names are crucial, so it had to be something catchy and sell able.

We, (I), named our product Choose Yer Chews!

Our phone bank in place (not me), our ad went out.  And BOOM! we were in business.

Every Billy Jays product has a mission statement, and our Choose Yer Chews! statement is no different:

"Choose you this day whom ye will chews, but as for me and my house we will Choose Yer Chews!

                                                                                                Billy Jays 24:15

And, as always, call now!

So now you know a bit more about how things go here in Billy Jays land!

And Jim, because of your fine suggestion, you are entitled to a free gift!

As a small token of our appreciation, please accept a case of Lotsa Nuts!

When you feel like a snack, eat Lotsa Nuts!

Because you are what you eat!

Your family, friends and neighbors will be overjoyed to know that you have a case of Lotsa Nuts! to share!

Don't forget to show them the picture of that handsome dude on the front!  They'll dig right in!

So, thank you Jim, for your suggestion and for helping to bring a new Billy Jays product to the world!  And I can say, without doubt, that the world appreciates it!

OK, fade to black...  I said FADE TO BLACK!  Hey, what's with that production engineer today?  FADE TO BLACK!!  That engineer's awfully slow today!!  Oh, it's me...

 

 

Posted by

Jay Markanich Real Estate Inspections, LLC  

Based in Bristow, serving all of Northern Virginia.

Office (703) 330-6388   Cell (703) 585-7560

www.jaymarinspect.com


Comments(33)

Jay Markanich
Jay Markanich Real Estate Inspections, LLC - Bristow, VA
Home Inspector - servicing all Northern Virginia

Well, F&K, thanks!  And I really do eat a lot of nuts.  Some think that shows... maybe more ways than one.

Dec 26, 2010 12:45 AM
Debbie Gartner
The Flooring Girl - White Plains, NY
The Flooring Girl & Blog Stylist -Dynamo Marketers

I think James is on to something.  Hope he gets royalties.

Dec 26, 2010 12:54 AM
Jay Markanich
Jay Markanich Real Estate Inspections, LLC - Bristow, VA
Home Inspector - servicing all Northern Virginia

Debbie - I actually sent a product idea to the folks at Cheerios and all I got back in return was a hearty thank you and a statement that once they received the idea it was considered theirs and no longer mine!

At least Jim gets a wonderful thank-you post and a box of nuts.  What more could make his day better?

Dec 26, 2010 01:00 AM
Bob "RealMan" Timm
Ward County Notary Services - Minot, ND
Owner of Ward Co Notary Services retired RE Broker

Over 100 times? How many rabbies shots Jay? I liked your steak master post too.

Dec 26, 2010 01:05 AM
Jay Markanich
Jay Markanich Real Estate Inspections, LLC - Bristow, VA
Home Inspector - servicing all Northern Virginia

Bob - that may be an exaggeration.  It might only be 98 or 99.  I get a shot easily every five years, if not more often!

Dec 26, 2010 01:11 AM
Lora "Leah" Stern 914-772-4528
Coldwell Banker, 170 N Main Street, New City NY 10956 - New City, NY
Real Estate Salesperson

Jay, looks like the dogs really like you.  Love your gift to Jim, though I'm sure he'd prefer royalties to recognition.

Dec 26, 2010 02:10 AM
Jay Markanich
Jay Markanich Real Estate Inspections, LLC - Bristow, VA
Home Inspector - servicing all Northern Virginia

Well, Leah, royalty loves to be recognized!  Since the royals don't do much, there's not much left for them...

Jim will get more than recognition!  There's that case of Lotsa Nuts!

Dec 26, 2010 02:15 AM
Kenneth Cole
Weichert Realtors Appleseed Group, 2043 Richmond Ave. S.I.N.Y. 10314. office phone 718-698-9797, Appleseedhomes.com... - Staten Island, NY
NYS Licensed Real Estate Salesperson

What does "nutsy" have to say about this?

Dec 26, 2010 03:28 AM
Jay Markanich
Jay Markanich Real Estate Inspections, LLC - Bristow, VA
Home Inspector - servicing all Northern Virginia

Haven't heard yet, but I offered him a case of Lotsa Nuts! on a previous post, Ken, and he never got back to me.

Dec 26, 2010 03:48 AM
Len Kobewka
Prairie Scapes / Scape-it™ - Calgary, AB
You Can Scape-it

Getting bit is the great motivator in life Jay ...   your story reminds me of the guy that went to the doctor -  the doctor said "hey there's a steering wheel hanging out of your pants" ... the guy replied to the doc ... " Yeah, it's driving me nuts" .

Dec 26, 2010 05:04 AM
Menlo Park Real Estate and Homes for Sale
Wende Schoof - Menlo Park, CA
WendeByTheBay.com - 650.504.0219 - SF Peninsula

Jay, speaking rodent must come in handy, being a home inspector.  I bet you have a few good stories there?

Dec 26, 2010 06:53 AM
Jay Markanich
Jay Markanich Real Estate Inspections, LLC - Bristow, VA
Home Inspector - servicing all Northern Virginia

That's a good one Len!  I heard the one where the guy raises his arm to the doctor and says it hurts and the doctor says, "Don't do that."

Wende - not so many.  But it does come in handy keeping them away from me in a crawl space...

Dec 26, 2010 09:12 AM
Justin Dibbs
Fairway Independent Mortgage - Ashburn, VA
Mortgage Advisor

Well done Billy, well done :-)

Dec 26, 2010 12:38 PM
Jay Markanich
Jay Markanich Real Estate Inspections, LLC - Bristow, VA
Home Inspector - servicing all Northern Virginia

Thanks Justin.  And I will tell Jay as well.  Billy

Dec 26, 2010 12:46 PM
Steven L. Smith
King of the House Home Inspection, Inc. - Bellingham, WA
Bellingham WA Home Inspector

Mr Jay,

Sorry to correct you, but his last name is Quintarillo. PS, I am wearing my citrus outfit.

Nutsy

Dec 26, 2010 02:55 PM
Jay Markanich
Jay Markanich Real Estate Inspections, LLC - Bristow, VA
Home Inspector - servicing all Northern Virginia

Thanks Nutsy, but you should direct that to Billy, not to me.  And he shouldn't have a hard time seeing you!

Dec 26, 2010 10:45 PM
Steven L. Smith
King of the House Home Inspection, Inc. - Bellingham, WA
Bellingham WA Home Inspector

Mr. Jay,

I believe that your sales of nuts would be more effective if my photo was on the can. I am known to be a culinary maestro and I have very good nuts. That photo-op can be arranged for a fee.

Nutsy

 

Dec 27, 2010 02:30 AM
Jay Markanich
Jay Markanich Real Estate Inspections, LLC - Bristow, VA
Home Inspector - servicing all Northern Virginia

Nutsy - then what would become of Mr. Jay of Mr. Jay's Neighborhood?  He allows his image on the can for free too...

Dec 27, 2010 07:10 AM
Steven L. Smith
King of the House Home Inspection, Inc. - Bellingham, WA
Bellingham WA Home Inspector

Dear Mr Jay,

Do you want to sell your nuts, or do you want to be on an ego trip? Nutsy is known to have good nuts and they would sell much better than your lesser nuts. No brag, just fact. Nutsy should be on the can.

Nutsy, the one with the nuts

 

Dec 28, 2010 01:41 AM
Jay Markanich
Jay Markanich Real Estate Inspections, LLC - Bristow, VA
Home Inspector - servicing all Northern Virginia

I have to say, Nutsy, that I have never sold my nuts, or any other part of me.  Oh, you meant...  Um, I did see a previous photo in another post of what you said your nuts were like in color.  Those did look like good nuts, although I prefer to eat brown or tan ones.

Maybe you can get our "president" to grow some of his own?

Dec 28, 2010 05:52 AM