At the creaky old age of 41, I used a power-washer for the first time today.  All men should have one.  If that sounds about right to you, then skip the rest of my commentary, and go to the hardware store and pick you up one.  They'd also make the ideal gift for one of those "man showers" they have now when kids get married.  Maybe somebody special will purchase their first home, and you want to get them the ideal housewarming gift.  If your friend is the man of the house, get him a power washer, and you'll eat steak every time you visit.

As a male homeowner, as a house guest who has overstayed your welcome, or as an older son living at home, I promise to you, owning a power washer will result in a cleaner home exterior, driveway, patio, wood deck or neighborhood at large (but you'll need a really long garden hose).

I borrowed the machine from my father-in-law.  It's an electric model, which I assumed to have less power than the gas-driven ones.  I was hoping it would be at least effective enough to help me clean the green and black gooky stuff off my wood deck, and it certainly was.  We're having a party tomorrow, and I was embarrassed how my deck looked like the bottom of a sunken ship, so I read some online articles about cleaners and bleaches and oxygen bleaches and power-washers, and was really dragging my feet on this particular home maintenance project.  I was pleasantly surprised to find power- washing to be a delightful experience, and recommend it to you and yourn for a variety of reasons.

My dear wife put the contraption together, because she used it the last time.  I don't remember what she used it for, but now I'm jealous.  I followed the steps of preparing, scrubbing down, and rinsing off the oxygen bleach cleaning stuff with excellent results after one application, then set out to get rid of those most stubborn stains with the power washer.

The power washer is awesome.

What's not to like?  It's a power tool.  It's like a gun.  It shoots water at stuff.  If you're a guy, I may have just pounded my point home without need for further persuasion.  If you're not convinced, or one of the women folk, keep reading.

Now that I have children, I generally consider myself a pacifist.  We'll never have a gun in our home.  I am completely adverse to war, or violence of any kind.  I don't like it on TV, in movies, and we don't have toys like that in our house.

That said, who among us doesn't like water guns?  Imagine you had one of those Super Soaker water guns connected to a hose, powered by some spewer engine or blaster ray or whatever makes water go real fast.   So, I'm standing on the deck, I turn the water on, and let me tell you...

It's cool to shoot things with a powerful water gun, and unlimited supply of water.  The bottom of my ship cleaned up to beautiful, raw lumber again.  I was careful not to shoot too closely, so as not to gouge the wood.  I read about that danger in some do it yourself online article.  All that was required was for me to back the shooter up, and spray the water from further away.  No problem, that'll give me more time to stand around and spray water everywhere.  That's the part why every man should have one:

I could have stood there all day with the power washer, and nearly  did.  It started raining while I was using it, and I didn't care.  The rain obviously didn't clean the deck off before, so I had a job to do.  Can you recall those old guys in the city who stand in their small patch of a front yard with their garden hose, spraying down their lawn by hand?  Now I understand what that is all about.  There has to be something metaphysical or spiritual about the calm you receive from watching water in motion...water fountains, waterfalls, water wings, all beautiful or...buoyant.

Using a power-washer for long periods of time makes you look productive in some way.  From a honey-do point of view, it appeared that I was diligently performing a much needed task around the house.  "It's OK dear, I'm alright.  I'm determined to blast all the dirty $#;# off our property."

I thought up a bunch of other things I could blast water towards...my driveway, the curbs, the brick on the house, my aluminum alloy car wheels, patio furniture... Based on my personal experience, the following are some things you probably shouldn't power-wash:

1. Flowers.
2. Windows.
3. Don't wash the kids or pets with a power-washer.  The kids might think it's fun to be sprayed at from far away, but the chance that they might figure out how to put the thing together leads me to my second concern, shooting the dog with it.  My new pup is about 3 pounds.  I'm visualizing something furry whizzing through the air like a wet flying squirrel.
4. Even if you get really dirty shooting stuff with your power washer, do not turn the wand at your own legs-that hurts a lot.
5. Per above, do not wash your Crocs with your feet in them-that hurts too.  As it turns out, neither should you wash your Crocs sans feet inside.  Croc shoes are really light, and when I sprayed them off, they rolled away like tumbleweeds, and I had to chase them out of my neighbor's bushes.

As a homeowner, nearly all outside things could stand a merciless power washing, from your sidewalks to your eaves and sofits; up to the chimney, and down to the garage floor.

So, borrow, rent or buy a power-washer today.  You'll be glad you did.