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What's in a Name?

By Sarah Cooper

Services for Real Estate Pros with Real Estate Shows

September 17, 2007 09:37 AM

Tall One, Little One and Sarah When my Mom was born, my Grandma gave her the middle name Jeannine, because it was the name of a girl in her favorite song from her teenage years, “Jeannine, I Dream of Lilac Time.”

When I was born, my Dad named me Sarah Jeannine.

Then I had a daughter. I don’t share my children’s names online because I'm a paranoid freak (as my kids say), but I will tell you that I passed on my middle name of Jeannine to Tall One. I realized that someday my daughter would likely marry and her last name wasn’t really mine anyway … I just wanted her to have a part of me to keep and carry with her.

Then God surprised us with Little One. She got my middle name too, for the same reason. If I’d had five daughters, they would all be Jeannine. This is the only name I have to pass on to them.

I love the connection this creates between them and my Mom, and to the Great Grandmother they don’t remember but I miss so much. Maybe they’ll grow up and have daughters of their own, and maybe even pass on the name. I don’t know how the future will go, but it’s possible that it could happen.

A name is just a word that indicates a person. It’s still just a word. The connection is real, but it's just symbolic.

Words are nothing and everything at the same time. Hearing the name of a loved one will make your heart beat faster. Hearing “I love you,” can fill you with joy and warmth.

Hateful words can still sting years later. “Sticks and stones may break my bones but words can really hurt me.”

They are only words, and they are one of the most powerful things in the world. The way we string them together tells everyone so much about us, whether we mean it to or not.

A lack of words can sometimes speak volumes.

I chose the words that indicate my kids with as much care as I possibly could. I wanted them to carry names that for their entire lives would make them feel wanted and connected to their family.

I choose the words I use here and out in the world carefully, too.

Maybe the most important thing to know about a word is that you can’t ever unsay it.

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Desiree Daniels

RE/MAX Tri County - Robbinsville, NJ

Oh and lets not forget to route for YOUR boys tonight

GO E A G L E S !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (just this one time)

Sep 17, 2007 10:21 AM

Christi Stewart

Prudential California Realty - Laguna Niguel, CA

Prudential Calif. Realty

Sarah,

How right you are about words being able to sting many years later. I learned this the hard way saying something to someone a few years ago that I have regretted ever since and always will. I've apologized but I truly believe this person has never forgiven me and I actually don't blame them. I will carry that guilt of hurting that person with me forever even though I had reason to be angry with that person. Life wouldn't be the same without these hard lessons along the way and hopefully because of what I learned I'm a better person for it in the long run.

Sep 17, 2007 10:39 AM

Kris Wales

Keller Williams Realty - Lakeside Market Center - Macomb, MI

Real Estate Blog & Homes for Sale search site, Macomb County MI

Sarah, I have to stop reading you when I'm feeling emotional. I do believe this is the 3rd post of yours I've read where you've brought me to tears. (No, that's not a bad thing. It's just my hubby look at me funny, one of those "Are you ok?" looks :-)

Your daughters are blessed to have you as their mom.

Sep 17, 2007 10:40 AM

Jason Crouch

Austin Texas Homes, LLC - Austin, TX

Broker - Austin Texas Real Estate (512-796-7653)

How true. Choosing words carefully is one of the primary skills that has helped me to succeed in my business (and my marriage, if I am being honest here). I didn't have any great family names to pass on, unless I wanted a "Junior". Most of our family names are ridiculously bad and my kids would never forgive me. Another terrific heartfelt post -

Sep 17, 2007 10:53 AM

Teresa Boardman

Boardman Realty - Saint Paul, MN

Sep 17, 2007 11:04 AM

Sarah Cooper

Real Estate Shows - Hurricane, WV

Tania - You have a beautiful name!

Donna - Tall One is not really tall, I'm just pretty short. I think she'll be average. ... I really should count before I speak ...

Dez - WHOOHOOOOOOO EAGLES!!!!!

Christi - Here, read this. It's for you. I just didn't know it then.

Kris - Really? That's about the sweetest thing I've ever heard. Thank you. *^_^*

Jason - I can see where carefully choosing words would help in marriage and in business. You're a wise man. :o)

Sep 17, 2007 11:04 AM

Sarah Cooper

Real Estate Shows - Hurricane, WV

Teresa - That is GORGEOUS. Thank you. :o)

Sep 17, 2007 11:06 AM

Missy Caulk

Missy Caulk TEAM - Ann Arbor, MI

Savvy Realtor - Ann Arbor Real Estate

Sarah, all five of my children have family names somewhere in there name. Your right we carry our heritage on through our kids. Look at George Forman, I think all his boys are named George Forman.

Sep 17, 2007 11:30 AM

Sharon Simms

Coastal Properties Group International - Christie's International - Saint Petersburg, FL

St. Petersburg FL - CRS CIPS CLHMS RSPS

Isn't it interesting how we can use middle names! The last name stays - or changes perhaps if you're a female. The first name is what identifies you as people use that all the time. The middle name can be a family name, first or last, a way of carrying on a maternal line, a tribute to someone who matters.

Sep 17, 2007 12:13 PM

Joan Mirantz

Homequest Real Estate - Concord, NH

Realtor, GRI, CBR, SRES - Concord New Hampshire

Sarah...Watching what I say...even when angry...is a personal "Golden Rule"

It is so important...especially when raising children. A misplaced word or phrase can change a life....and is never forgotten!

Sep 17, 2007 12:19 PM

Celeste "SALLY" Cheeseman

Liberty Homes - Mililani, HI

(RA) AHWD CRS ePRO OAHU HAWAII REAL ESTATE

This was last night...my little 25 year old sitting next to her gramma...she was named half for this gramma and half for the other one.

What connects us here are the words...I don't care if it's typewritten words or what....I have been really bashed three times. Words hurt....I am not thick skinned...and not sure how much of one I do want.

Thank you for thinking of me little sister. I really appreciate your thoughtfulness and tell little one thank you as well for the nice pick.

Sep 17, 2007 12:22 PM

Colleen Irwin

Retired - Irondequoit, NY

Creative Real Estate Solutions...

Sarah -- My mother, grandmother, great grandmother and great grandmother all share the same middle name -- Patricia... I only had a son, no daughter, so I won't be able to carry on the tradition.

Sep 17, 2007 12:40 PM

Ann Cummings

RE/MAX Shoreline - NH and Maine - Portsmouth, NH

Portsmouth NH Real Estate Preferrable Agent

Hi Sarah - you are so right about words not being able to be taken back! I think there are some people who really just don't care what comes flying out of their mouths.....

I was named after my mom and my mom's sister, and I go by my middle name of Ann. I'm really glad that's what my parents called me all my life, especially since my mom is no longer with us. Three out of the five of us (all girls) were named after someone in our family.

Ann

Sep 17, 2007 02:04 PM

Thesa Chambers

West + Main - Bend, OR

Principal Broker - Licensed in Oregon

Sarah - I am glad to know we are not the only freaks - I am a Louise (middle name) my aunt is, my grandmother was, my great grandmother was and her mother too we can trace back 10 generations where the oldest daughter shares the middle name Louise - looks like my girls will break the cycle - they have no girls and none of them had the heart to name a boy Sue or Lousie :o)

Sep 17, 2007 06:27 PM

Sarah Cooper

Real Estate Shows - Hurricane, WV

Dez - :o(

Missy - I was waiting for a George Forman reference! :o)

Sharon - In Japan they don't use middle names. My Japanese friends are always interested in these "hidden names" and maybe kind of wonder why we bother ...

Joan - You're right about that! And kids soak up every word, good and bad.

Sally - Awww, thanks for the picture! How sweet! Yes, here especially we are connect by our words. I'm not thick skinned either but I've been lucky in that others have stood up for me. That helps. I'll pass it on to Little One, she'll be happy. :o)

Colleen - Oh, that's kind of sad! But at the same time, the connection there is so nice. Maybe you'll end up with a granddaughter with the name. It's OK if it skips a generation. :o)

Ann - I love it when there's a reason behind names. And yes, some people just don't care what they say, or maybe they just don't realize.

Thesa - Like Colleen, you might have to wait an extra generation! (But now I'm just hearing "A Boy Named Sue" in my head!)

Sep 17, 2007 09:04 PM

Thomas Weiss

Thomas R. Weiss - West Palm Beach, FL

Sarah,

I think it's a great question, I always wonder sometimes, how names define people, and who they are...

Great Post!!

Tom Weiss

Sep 18, 2007 01:59 AM

Trace Galle

Designs by Trace - Kelowna, BC

Hi Sarah,

Nice post. I see from another comment we are not the only one's with Marie as a middle name. Marie is my third name and my mother's third name is Marie and so both my daughters have Marie as their third name. I also thought that Marie could be a family name that my children could pass down to their children if they want too. You are so right about words sometimes they can be dangerous because once said you can never take them back.

Sep 18, 2007 02:32 AM

Jeannette Neerpat

CondoDomain.com - Coral Springs, FL

e-Pro Coral Springs/Parkland Real Estate

I always hear boys taking the name of their fathers, but never the mothers passing on to their daughters.So I wanted to be different(so i thought at the time) by giving my first name as my daughters middle name, acutally third name. Her second name is a hindu name. Taking the culture of my in-laws. I'm glad to hear that others try passing on the same tradition. I always love your posts. Thanks!

Sep 18, 2007 03:53 PM

Karen Anne Stone

New Home Hunters of Fort Worth and Tarrant County - Fort Worth, TX

Fort Worth Real Estate

Sarah Jeannine: What a wonderful thing you have done for your daughters. Sixty years from now, every time Tall One and Little One sign their names, there you'll be... all wrapped up in their hearts. With you as their Mom, every day for them is Christmas, and every day for you is Mother's Day. You are truly fortunate. Huggs and MWA's to all three of you. Karen Anne

Sep 18, 2007 06:33 PM

Rita Taylor

None - Sanford, NC

Sanford NC Real Estate - Homes for Sale in Sanford North Carolina

"Maybe the most important thing to know about a word is that you can’t ever unsay it. "

What an insightful sentence. I think we have all had times where we wished we could unsay something to prevent opening that can of worms.

My son is named after my husband's favorite Uncle. Names are one way our loved ones live on after they are gone. Thank you for this post.

Sep 21, 2007 02:52 PM