~ A Light Side of a Dark Subject ~
A good friend of mine finally made that dreaded appointment. He knew he should have done it years ago, but like so many folks, he avoided it and turned the other check on the elephant in the room. He finally decided to face it head on. He called his doctor and scheduled his appointment for his colonoscopy. I was proud of him for doing so. Colon cancer is a Cancer that can be cured, if caught early enough. But because of the way it is tested for, it is all too often avoided.
Yesterday I shared a story with him written by Dave Barry and published back in 2008. I cannot remember exactly how I had stumbled across the article (probably by some forwarded email), but I knew I had to share it with my friend, Bob (not his real name). I thought if I had him read it, it would lessen the fear of that hose and lighten his spirit. You should read Dave's story, " A Journey into my colon -- and yours". It is a little long but so worth the read. You will be able to understand a few of the text messages Bob and I have been sending one another tonight.
Bob has started his MoviPrep tonight. His first text was, "Belly growing, no butt gravy yet." I wasn't expecting a text and when I read it, I was thankful I wasn't drinking at the time. The next message was, "beginning rectal spasms" This was so in line with Dave Barry's story. Then came his next text and had me in tears. "It shoots out with the same velocity as Old Faithful." Then came, "Rectum just turned inside out...Need help stuffing it back in." Followed by, "Never-mind, I got it stuffed back in, getting ready to blow again."
So I thought I would send some humor his way and text-ed, "Toot Toot" And he quickly responded, " this is a lot bigger than a toot". To which I replied, "Honk Honk." Then I get, "Starting to push out things I won't eat until next week." "I have a toilet seat imprint on my butt and it's sore." Followed by, "Vaseline won't do, I NEED Holy Water." 
Now, it's easy for me to get his texts because I'm not going through it, but I have to say, I am so laughing at the messages he is sending. His latest text, "I could put out a forest fire with my a__"
Today, Bob went to his, ehm, exam that he had studied so hard for. His colon came through with flying colors. And Bob is relieved beyond words. The big elephant in the room has just marched out his door.
If you are over the age of 50 and have not had a Colonoscopy yet, what are you waiting for? The worst part of the test is preparing for the test. My suggestion, would be to read Dave Barry's article and this will certainly lighten up the load stress of having one done.
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