I Would No Longer Ask You to ADD Me

An Article I read today had me retrospect on one of my boldest (to borrow Lisa Dunham's word) attempt to increase my association numbers in such a short time. I was a tangible AR greenhorn when I homogenized the FB platform to AR--adding associates was as simple as adding friends.

My bold move was not futile though. I got to meet few cherished friends and associates on AR.

Why do we subsribe to AR, FB, Twitter, Linked-In, etc? To network right?  Here’s what not to do when you’re trying to expand or leverage your network as enumerated on the article

1. "Try to take before you give." Remember the fairy tale Jack and the Beanstalk. The popular quatrain "Fee-fi-fo-fum,

I smell the blood of an .... is exactly what others smell when you desperately ask for referrals. Make them come to you. Let them contact you because of the distinctive something you can give to them. Your value. Your invaluable service.

2. "Assume others should care about your needs."  Everybody has needs to fulfill. Maslow's hierarchy of needs theory is your queue. Hence, do not expect that someone can easily lend you a hand when in need. Exude compassion. It resonates.

3. "Assume tools create connections." "Twitter followers, Facebook friends, and LinkedIn connections are great—if you do something with those connections. In all likelihood your Twitter followers aren’t reading your tweets. Your Facebook friends rarely visit your page. Your LinkedIn connections aren’t checking your updates."

4. "Take the shotgun approach." I love this part. "Some people network with anyone, tossing out business cards like confetti. Networking isn’t a numbers game." I can definitely relate to this as my blog attest to it---I was like a child desperately seeking friendship in the AR sphere.

"Always select the people you want to network with. And keep your list relatively small, because there is no way to build meaningful connections with dozens or hundreds of people."

Since my membership with AR in August 2011, I only have 12 associations to this date. Am I worried or disappointed? NO. They are not merely associates in my opinion. They belong to my circle of friends---in my circle of TRUST. 

 "All that matters is whether you can help each other reach your goals." The KEY is to TRUST each other. Don't follow Robert de Niro's Trust issue. :)