Are We Alone? Three Words You Don't Want To Hear When Holding An Open House
I remember when I bought my first home in the mid 1980s in Matteson, Illinois a far southern suburb in the Chicago, Illinois marketplace. As soon as I moved in my neighbors place their home on the market. It was as if they waited to see who was purchasing, then decided it was time to sell. Although it was over several months, it felt like overnight I watch many other owners unlike me place their homes on the market. The new purchasers were very much like me.
What bothered me was I came in and upgraded the home. I Invested in new professional landscaping and improved the interior of the home. I observed many other Buyers like me do the same in this neighbood about a decade old at the time. I thought how sad it was these existing owners were not willing to accept diversity in their neighborhood. I tryed to sell myself on the idea I was purchasing a starter home and it was time for the other owners to upgrade to a larger home?
Then, I discovered where most of the Sellers were moving to. They were moving to an almost non-integrated neighboring community. This community had a similar squarefootage inventory of homes.
I lived in the Matteson home for nine years and upgraded to a larger home in Richton Park, Illinois. This larger home needed nearly a total gut renovation. Upon completion of all the improvements, which also included more professional landscaping for a home located on a corner lot of a cul-de-sac, I started to see the same experience I had in the first home.
I thought, if these people got to know me they would see we probably have more in common than uncommon. I desired a nice home in a nice neighborhood with great schools convenient to amenities and transportation. I had made a nice profit on my first home and determined to make another profit on this next home, which I did after living there for seven years.
Now I've lived in the upscale Village of Frankfort, Illinois for 8 years now. My present home is custom built. I live in a diverse community where the majority of the neighbors care more about the content of my character, than the color of my skin as Dr. Martin Luther King dreamed for our great nation. The funny thing is I literally live now within five minutes of both my previous homes.
Where I live now the homes are worth probably more than double the price range of my two previous neighborhoods. The story Terri shares below revived the question I have of why I'm experiencing far more joy in my current neighborhood surrounded by neighbors who celebrate diversity in their community?
The hair stood up on the back of my neck. My palms became sweaty. My mind raced to find a way out. All this happened within two seconds of a man at my open house leaning in very close and in a whisper saying three words to me, "Are we alone?"
He didn't seem sinister. He didn't look like a bad guy. He actually was pretty doggone cute. I had shown him all through the house, talked about why he was moving, what he liked and didn't like about the house, if it was in his price range, blah blah blah. Initially when he came in the house, my partner was at the house. If we are going to be alone at an open house, we make sure there is someone checking in with us. He had gone though to remove the signs and was heading back to the office. I really was alone and had already brought in the open house sign in front of the house.
"We are right now." I said. "But my partner is picking up signs and will be back any minute." I lied. Secretly wishing I had a weapon with me.
He leaned in closer. I could feel his breath on my cheek. Then he sliced through the air with the statement, "Good. I'm glad we're alone. That means you can be honest with me." He then proceeded to ask me if there was a particular race of people living in the neighborhood.
I was so shocked. I had prepared myself for what I thought was coming after, "Are we alone?" What I didn't expect was someone so blatantly wanting me to go against the Fair Housing Act by giving him information about the racial diversity of the neighborhood. I simply told him, "I don't have the information you're looking for and I'm not the kind of person who would violate the Fair Housing Act for you."
He got closer and said, "C'mon! You have to know. Wouldn't this be a great sale for you? I have my reasons for needing to know this information."
I walked to the door - I don't know where I got the courage - but I opened the door, motioned for him to go out, and simply stated, "I can't help you."
After he left, I locked all the doors and began shaking all over. In a matter of just a couple of minutes, I had a whole flood of emotions from fear to anger.
Yes, I was angry at him. How dare he even ask such a thing! I hadn't rehearsed how I would answer something like that. I'm just glad that I was brought up in a home where prejudice and bias wasn't found. The sad thing is we can enact laws that people must follow, but until people are able to look beyond the color of ones skin every minute of every day, we will still have these people who want us to go against our own moral fiber, but also to break the law.
I guess the point of this post is not about changing the world, although I wish a mere blog post could do that, but to make you aware that you could also be confronted by soneone like this, and perhaps it's a good idea to have a statement ready when, or if, it happens to you. I would recommend finding that statement from the very core of your own being. Then it's genuine, sincere, and you will never look back and wonder if you said the right thing.
The following video from REALTOR TV is a must watch for anyone who is a REALTOR dealing with the public. It's called Unintentional Discrimination.
Ta-Dah!
Terri Camp, GRI
DFW Texas Homes, LLC
817-914-4987
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