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Emotions FOR SALE - price negotiable

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Real Estate Agent with Majestic Properties 3061802

loveBuying or selling real estate can be extremely emotional.  You often hear that "you must detach yourself emotionally from your home when selling" or "not to make an emotional purchase".  This is very easy to say, and is something we have been hearing for decades, but WHY??

Usually people are making the biggest purchase of their lives when buying a home and are making the biggest sale of their lives when selling, so why can't you be emotional??PROTECTION

 

  • Emotion usually clouds the senses and your judgment.  
  • Emotion usually helps you make irrational decisions.
  • Emotion puts LIFE in our world.

So here's what I think.  Without emotion, buyers would just visit listings and would never find that property that makes their heart skip a beat or make them extremely excited.  Without emotion sellers would only worry about their bottom dollar and would not care about any other detail regarding their home.  TALK ABOUT BORING!  We live in a society where hiding your feelings is the norm.

SATISFACTIONMy advice is to keep it real!  Be emotional! Your emotions will tell you when you are working with the right Realtor, one that makes you feel comfortable and cares about your needs.  Your emotions will let you know when you have found the perfect property.  Your emotions will tell you that your Realtor has found the perfect buyer for your home.  

Go ahead and show emotion when you make the biggest purchase or sale of your life!  Is it only normal!

Comments(119)

Stefan Scholl
Buyer's Broker of Northern Michigan, LLC - Petoskey, MI
Northern Michigan Real Estate
I am happy to bring my clients back to earth when their emotions get the best of them.  I agree that buying a home is an emotional process, and emotions should not be ignored.  But I think it is best (at least for homebuyers) to show your emotions only to your own agent, who can then process them and deal with the other party and their agent on a rational and detached basis.  Isn't that what we are there for? 
Jan 01, 2007 01:36 PM
Rick & Ines - Miami Beach Real Estate
Majestic Properties - Miami Beach, FL

I agree with you Stefan but I have a question for everyone.  Rick and I were discussing this yesterday and want some of you to enlighten us (Monika - you mentioned you do this with your buyers).  What is the point of asking buyers to put "poker faces" on?  What is the advantage of a buyer today to not show emotion when seeing a home?  Is it because you think you'll be able to negotiate better if the buyer doesn't show emotion? 

We have seen buyers jump up and down with joy and saying "this is it! this is the one!" and it does not mean they will pay more for the house, it doesn't even mean they'll place an offer for the house.  Maybe it's our market, but a buyer showing emotion at a showing means absolutely nothing here in Miami, in this buyers' market.

Jan 01, 2007 01:55 PM
Monika McGillicuddy
Berkshire Hathaway HomeServices Verani Realty - Hampstead, NH
Southern NH & the Seacoast Area

Ines...Poker face only when the other agent is present...if it is just me and my client then not a problem they can show all the emotion they want.

Generally I advise that only for negotiations because it would put them at a disadvantage if the other side saw just how much they wanted the house.

I've done it myself...play hardball when I've picked up just how much they (The other side) wants it...I've adviesed my seller to drop a little and see how much wiggle room the buyer has because they really love the house...

I also think that in a Buyers market it may not matter as much as in a Sellers market just like you stated.

Jan 02, 2007 02:13 AM
Rick & Ines - Miami Beach Real Estate
Majestic Properties - Miami Beach, FL
Thank you Monika - your explanation makes perfect sense, and I'm glad you agree about the Buyers Market.
Jan 02, 2007 02:30 AM
Jeff Turner
RealSatisfied - Santa Clarita, CA

I have a bit of a contrary viewpoint on this. Done correctly, showing emotion can be an advantage. I use it for personal negotiation all the time, because trying to mask some of your feelings ALWAYS results in masking other unintended feelings as well. It makes me unauthentic. 

So, I show how much I want a thing, be it a car, house, whatever... and use my desire for it to highlight the level of my objections. My objections are more real because all of my emotions are real. When I say, "I love this _______, but your price is unreasonable. No matter how much I love it, I can't allow myself to make this purchase at that price." They can see that I mean both sides. If what I'm asking for is reasonable and important, then I'm willing to walk away from the table. If they know I would really like to buy, love it and want it, but I'm walking away ONLY because of that thing, my personal experience has proven they are more likely to ask me to come back to the table.

Again, this is just my own personal experience, but it works for me.

Jan 02, 2007 02:41 AM
Rick & Ines - Miami Beach Real Estate
Majestic Properties - Miami Beach, FL

Jeff - that's the way we handle all of our business.  We let our customers express emotion infront the other agents as well as owners.  Everyone involved will know that the buyers want the property, but doesn't mean they'll pay "anything" for it.   Even in a seller's market, if you did not move quickly enough, you would loose the property, there were people placing offers in 3 and 4 properties at the same time hoping they would get one of them. 

To add to why showing emotion is a good tool for me.  When I'm working with a buyer and they show exitement at a property but not at the other, it's leverage I use to tell them, "but this house did not move you like the other one, I have never seen you get so excited with a property, are you sure you don't want to see the other property again?" - more than once, they see the other property and place an offer.

Jan 02, 2007 03:07 AM
Billnulls Blog Florida Realty Professional
Charles Rutenberg Realty - Clearwater, FL
AHWD
Emotions - it is difficult for our clients to keep sales and purchases separate from emotions and it is what keeps the pharmaceutical industry going ---------
Oct 22, 2007 02:10 AM
Diane Aurit
LKN Realty, LLC - Mooresville, NC
Lake Norman Real Estate
This is so true, I'm glad you included in your six pack.  I think emotion is what makes our job meaningful and rewarding.  There is nothing more satisfying than knowing your clients are living in their perfect home!
Oct 22, 2007 02:12 AM
* Rate A Home
Rate A Home - Saugatuck, MI
Emotions in Real-estate will always be a part of the process, but the best approach is still a due diligence approach combined with emotions to avoid making the wrong decision and choice.
Oct 22, 2007 02:32 AM
Rick & Ines - Miami Beach Real Estate
Majestic Properties - Miami Beach, FL

Bill and Barbara Jo - the discussion here was interesting because we cannot deny the emotional side of real estate.  The only ones that don't involve emotions are investors.  It's up to us, to be able to focus those emotions and to be able to interpret them correctly.

Diane - absolutely!  I totally agree.

Duane - you got it!  to avoid emotions and to say there is not room for them is a mistake.

Oct 22, 2007 02:52 AM
* Rate A Home
Rate A Home - Saugatuck, MI

Rick, I hear so many buyers dive into a home simply on emotions only to move into the home and wonder what they were thinking. 

The general public rarely invests for their retirement utilizing an emotional approach. They always utilize the investment professional to provide them with due diligence, yet in their largest investment in life, they don't seem to use the tools to make the right choice to meet their or more importantly their families needs.

 

Oct 22, 2007 03:33 AM
Rick & Ines - Miami Beach Real Estate
Majestic Properties - Miami Beach, FL

Duane - but I know you would agree that a transaction without emotion could also be detrimental.  I think the best approach is for the customer to let the emotions flow, and hire a professional to keep those emotions in check.

ines

Oct 22, 2007 04:01 AM
* Rate A Home
Rate A Home - Saugatuck, MI

Ines, I agree, Real Estate will always be bought with some emotions. The tough part is when you have a couple purchasing a home that each have different heights of emotions on what meets their personal needs.

Utilizing a professional, and putting those emotions into a buyers home rating system where it combines both parties emotions to show which home best meets a couples needs together eliminates the frustration and streamlines the choice.

You chose a great topic here! BTW, love your city, my wife and I spent our honeymoon there.

Oct 23, 2007 01:07 AM
Rick & Ines - Miami Beach Real Estate
Majestic Properties - Miami Beach, FL
Duane - I think you mentioned the most difficult scenario.  I've had many of those and sometimes it is almost impossible for them to come to terms.
Oct 23, 2007 01:28 AM
Allison Stewart
St.Cloud Homes - Saint Cloud, FL
St. Cloud Fl Realtor, Osceola County Real Estate 407-616-9904
Bravo Ines!   It is an emotional experience. You point out all the reasons to made sound decisions, but it is OK to love the house you are buying.
Oct 23, 2007 01:28 AM
* Rate A Home
Rate A Home - Saugatuck, MI

Ines, same here until I developed the program. I felt like a marriage counsoler sometimes while touring homes with buyers. Some expected me to make the choice for them which is never a win win for us as agents.

Oct 23, 2007 01:34 AM
Rick & Ines - Miami Beach Real Estate
Majestic Properties - Miami Beach, FL
Duane - we wear so many different hats as Realtors.....isn't it fun?
Oct 23, 2007 02:11 AM
* Rate A Home
Rate A Home - Saugatuck, MI
Ines, we do and more hats to come. It's even more of a challenge with todays market.
Oct 23, 2007 02:21 AM
Celeste "SALLY" Cheeseman
Liberty Homes - Mililani, HI
(RA) AHWD CRS ePRO OAHU HAWAII REAL ESTATE

Yeah...I have too much emotional stuff wrapped up in a client sometimes...then again, I sure have made some unreal friends as well as faithful clients and many referrals!

And....I reallllly love my house now that I have a new bathroom/tub/walls/plumbing. WooHoo!

Oct 23, 2007 01:46 PM
Rick & Ines - Miami Beach Real Estate
Majestic Properties - Miami Beach, FL
Sally, our customers always become our friends and we end up hanging out.  I LOVE when that happens!
Oct 23, 2007 01:58 PM