The call came in, as many calls do, over the main line at the office.
"Coldwell Banker, this is Alan, how can I help you?"
"I'd like to know about this house."
"Which house is that, sir?", as I nudged the MLS awake, and readied myself for the search.
"The third one from the left".
"uh... I beg your pardon, sir?"
"I got your mailer, and it's the third house from the left..."
Unaccustomed as I am to successfully thinking on my feet I tried to stall, as I furiously tried to remember what mailer I might have sent out... drawing a complete blank, I don't remember sending out any mailing with houses.
"Which mailing is that, sir?"
He begins to sound a bit irritated with me. I'm costing him valuable "the Price is Right" time. "The mailing with all the houses on it... it just came in yesterday's mail".
"What's the address of the property?" I asked, hoping to regain my footing.
"There are no addresses for the photos."
"How about the price of the property, or the room count?"
"Nope, no prices, and all it says is '3 bedroom'... it's BLUE!... it's the third one from the left!" Now his irritation is strongly evident.
"Is there a name and phone number of an agent on the mailer?"
"Yes, it says: Robert Miller, 555-1213".
"Have you considered..." I asked gingerly "... giving Mr. Miller a call?"
"Why can't YOU help me?" Now he's yelling.
"Well, since I didn't send you the mailer", I explain very politely, "without a bit more information, I have no way of knowing which house is the third house from the left, so I can't tell you anything about the property. Would you care to tell me a little bit about what you're looking for, and I'll see what I can find that fits you?"
[ click ] good luck Mr. Miller.
- 8

ALAN MAY, Realtor®
Specializing in Evanston Real Estate and North Shore Real Estate
Coldwell Banker Residential Real Estate, 2929 Central Street, Evanston, IL 60201
847.425.3779 Cell: 847.924.3313 Email: Almay@aol.com
Evanston Real Estate & North Shore Real Estate • Licensed in Illinois

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101 Comments on Why can't YOU help me?
Allen I have a lot of people on Auto Notification. And they call me up and say, I love the house you sent me last week. I feel pretty stupid as I try to figure it out.
Alan, and when you get the call from the one and only customer that wants the perfect 3 bedroom home in the northern suburbs, why can't you narrow it down to the PERFECT 3 or 4 to show them from that description???
This is hysterical, Alan. I wonder if he ever found his Village.
Alan, Sounds like you have a motivated client on the line, just needs a bit of direction. My approach would have been to invite him into the office to show me the advertisement and then help him to find a 3 bedroom blue house in the neighborhood of his choice.
Should have just told him what house, I'm a dentist.....I missed the class on Mind Reading 101.
Alan, These are the calls that I get from the internet daily. I try most of the time to be really patient...but it ain't always easy. Not complaining that the phone is ringing.
You write with such humor.
Margaret
wow! I'm #88 now! lol, seems we all have those calls. Some more, some less:)
But maybe, the right anwer would be 'that one is juuuuust sold', but I'd be happy to find you another one like that! So, what is that you liked about that house?"
:)))
Do you think, you look sometimes like this? or a client ?:)))
Alan,
that was a funny one but on the positive side - you got the call! Also like your diplomatic ending with the call to action... Congrats on -8. Be well
Classic! :-)
Lynda - you make it sound as though there was time to do this. The call was all of 20 seconds. Sorry, still not accepting the blame for this one... not every caller can be helped. They're not all as logical as children. Remember when I didn't know the process?? I always knew... (always) that if I wanted to know something about a house, I needed an address, and I wouldn't get upset with someone for pointing that out.
Cynthia - just a regurgitation of #38. She'd like to blame this caller's idiocy on me.
Cameron - oh, I know that one.
Amanda - yep... you can't fix stupid.
Gene - I've had that, too. But in that case it's our fault, not theirs... right?
Joe - interesting thought.
Jane - LOL!
Bob - it was a floor call. that opportunity never presented itself in the 20-second phone call. Bob, have you met Lynda?
Janine - I don't get the "dentist" reference.
Rome - you either laugh, or you cry... not much choice in between.
Inna - nah... I don't want to "lie" to the guy.. .and tell him it's sold, only to find out that it's one of our office's listings, and I've just pissed-off one of our own sellers. And yes, I think that's a photo of me.
Peter - my call to action was met with a "click".
Silvia - isn't it?
It is great to know that people out there think we REALTORS have such mental powers! Thanks for the story...never a dull moment!
Alan, you have to wonder how he got your number? Very funny story! :)
Bil, Bil, Bill Austin - no, he didn't get my name from anywhere... It was a random floor call.
Rachel - we don't?
Barbara - it was a random floor call.
Robert Miller, Alan May, aren't all Realtors the same.....and I thought I've had a few strange phone calls.
Steven - yes, we're all the same.
Wow! He got upset for calling the wrong agent.
Jairo - there's not logic invovled.
Oh goodness, that is hilarious. We don't hold a huge inventory of listings but we generally have around 15-20 and we often get phone calls from people asking about "our listing." Which listing? "I don't know the address, I'm just sitting in front of it and your name is on the sign." I'm sorry, you are going to have to give me more information, we have more than one listing. "The green one." Okay, I don't have the color of every home I have listed memorized, can you at least tell me what street you are on?
It's pretty incredible. -Kasey
Kasey - it is incredible... literally!