If I had to describe my Dad in one word, and just one word, it would be laughter.
Well, hard headed, determined, stubborn and mule headed come to mind, but if it was just one word, hands down, it would be laughter.
My Dad had that ability to make me chuckle every day. Matter of fact he made me laugh throughout the day. Sometimes he would get me to laugh so hard it just hurt. Or he would have me laugh until I would cry. And sometimes he would get me laughing until I could hardly breathe.
The laughter began when I was very little. He had ugly toes. They are officially called Hammer toes. All he had to do to get me to crack up was take his socks off. I would go into fits of laughter. This lasted throughout his lifetime. Socks off, laughter. Wiggle toes, more laughter.
I remember the time in Sixth Grade when I had to write an essay about " What Freedom Means to Me." It was a contest sponsored by the American Legion and the winner was to be announced at the Graduation. My Dad read my entry and in his usual diplomatic style said, " You sure are not going to win any awards with that." He really kind of hurt my feelings so I quietly rewrote it, submitted it, and went about the business of picking out my Graduation Dress and Shoes. When the winner was announced and it was , much to my own amazement , me, I all but heard the THUD on the gymnasium floor. Nothing was more fun than to see my Dad eat that much crow. This was fodder for a lifetime of laughter whenever he would tell me I could not do something. It was like the best blessing of all just to see the wide eyed wonder from my Dad when I would then get the best of him.
Over the years, when his "Number One Daughter," as he called me, would do something or say something that met his complete disapproval, he would get this forlorn look on his face, hang and shake his head from side to side, then put his hand against his forehead, and moan loudly..." After ALL that tuition I paid." But he knew, I mean REALLY knew, how much I loved and appreciated Severn. He also mentioned several times over the past few years that he bought Breezy so that his children had a summer vacation. We did not just have a week or two of summer vacation here and there, we had a childhood where we INHALED summers at the Beach each and every summer and to this day cherish those memories and friendships from Breezy, too.
I remember the time when we were young teenagers and he came back unexpectedly from a fishing trip. He got off our boat , Snoopy , and walked on the Porch at the Beach House with one fishing Pole in one hand and one fishing pole in the other. Well, the lights were off. Our house was the hangout for all the Community Kids so as he opened the door with both fishing poles, heads started popping up from this sofa and that sofa and this chair and that chair because you see there was a lot of old fashioned necking going on. My Dad was so embarrassed and so stunned that he just froze, fishing poles and all. Then he finally collected himself and with not one word ( just imagine that ) marched forward to the back bedroom with one fishing pole in each hand. He said he just closed the door and stood there with both fishing poles completely frozen in his tracks not knowing what to say or do. DBR...speechless, imagine that. We laughed until we cried whenever we brought this story up.
My Dad had a bicycle at Breezy Point. He rode his bicycle everywhere in his Hawaiian Cabana Bathing Suit Sets to cruise around and check out the Campgrounds, Beach and Marina. One summer, he awoke to a missing bicycle. There on the beach was a perfectly stacked, perfectly engineered pyramid of picnic tables. And right on top, the very top, was his bicycle. How they got all those picnic tables stacked and his bicycle on top was quite an engineering feat. We spent decades laughing and wondering about it. I think I unearthed the story off Facebook years later. We were all at dinner and just as I started to tell him who did it he stopped me. He did not want to know. It had brought us way too much laughter for too many decades and the fun was not knowing who made that Summer Shrine for his Beach Bicycle.
Then there was the summer he had the raccoon eyes. Yes, two black eyes all big and swollen. I am sure it looked like Mom had belted him but the truth was just so much more fun. You see, something happened while he was peddling around one night on his bicycle and he forgot that the side gate was locked. He went crash, bam, boom right smack into the gate. And this would rate as one of the best laughs of an entire lifetime. He loved every single minute of it.
I remember the years at Virginia Tech. I was my Father's Daughter. I would call home homesick saying the only water came out of a faucet. I missed the Chesapeake Bay. I missed home. So my Dad made me a stack of homemade postcards. They had labels and stamps and were in a production pile. Each day he would send me a two liner or four liner that rhymed or made me laugh. They were always signed DBR and Sport. He was on a one Dad mission to make sure I stayed in school. He mailed me a postcard almost every day for three years until I came home. He understood homesick and he did his part to make sure I stayed and got that Business Degree on the One Postcard a Day Plan.
I remember he picked me up at Va Tech on the way to Florida to meet Mom one Christmas Holiday. It was the only time he visited me there. I saw that yellow Gremlin buzzing around to find me which was quite a big deal because he liked the water not the mountains. Once we took off he asked me to read the maps. He must not have read my third grade Iowa scores because that was not and is not one of my strong suits. Anyway, I failed to read the Map Guide and we ended up on some unfinished road going nowhere in North Carolina. We spent a whole day lost in North Carolina but we spent a lifetime laughing about it. It was worth every minute. Even the waitress for Breakfast that next day caught our fancy. We started watching and observing and getting such a kick out of her mannerisms that we started laughing until we could not breathe. I can still chuckle about that trip. All we had to do was mention the North Carolina waitress and the day we spent lost in North Carolina and we would erupt into fits of laughter.
When he mentioned last winter he had found these cool clipboards and I said I would like one, he asked what color. I said Purple so he proceeded to tell me how utterly impossible it would be to find a purple clipboard. I do not need to tell you how attached I am to my NEW purple polka dotted clipboard and how I grinned from ear to ear when he presented it to me.
Last May when my Dad got back from Florida he came to visit me right away. I had not thought much about it when he was with my Niece and Mom but Jordy got on FaceTime to talk to me and Mom got on FaceTime but for some reason Daddy would not. Frankly, he loved technology type things but I did not think much about it then. When he came back home to see me he had this goatee looking thing. I hit the roof. Mind you I bit my bloody tongue but I managed to keep my big mouth shut because I knew good and well if I said one word, just one word, he would be off to the races and I would never get him to get rid of that thing. Little did I know that it was a stand off. He had grown it to get me all riled up but no one in the family ever let me in on the gig. He managed to get one more laugh out of me when they all finally fessed up and told me afterwards. He was just trying to pluck my very one last nerve.
I read a political except to my Dad a few months ago. I was laughing so hard I could hardly spit it out. He was laughing so hard at me not being able to read it in between all the laughter that we both just could not breathe because we ended up laughing so hard.
My Dad would deadpan that his truck did not brake at Starbucks. I would say that this was no problem because mine braked at every one. Last Fall I got in the habit of dropping by his office frequently in the afternoon to share my Starbucks treat with him. The day of the Earthquake I stopped by Homes America a few minutes after the quake but he could not hustle out the building fast enough with me Starbucks treat or no Starbucks treat. I did not have to tell him twice that I thought he needed to leave the building.
All my Dad had to do to get me to roar was tell me one of his stories. Around Christmas, Mom was up at the DC House one night. He always called his next door Neighbor, Wanda, the Old Bat. Everyone was in on the game. Wanda passed away a couple of years ago but for many years after we lost Daddy's fishing buddy and her husband, Ralph, they would tease each other unmercifully. Wanda, however, loved my Mother and would never, ever do anything to harm her Esther. But David? Oh don't get me started. Anyway, Mom was safely in D.C. one night and heaven or no heaven it was time for one of Wanda's hijinks. Her daughter Buttons was in the Islands. Well, the horn started going off on Wanda's car. NONSTOP. Like in the middle of the night. DBR called the police but to no avail. There was no key and no way to stop the blaring horn the ENTIRE night long. All Daddy had to do was start the story and we knew beyond any shadow of a doubt that the Old Bat had gotten the best of him. And we got miles of smiles and lots of laughter about it.
Yes, indeed, my Dad was hard headed, mule headed, stubborn, determined and THE hardest working person I've ever known. But what was surprising was that when he was in a bevy of women he was genuinely the most comfortable of all. He loved my friends and being around us all. You see, during the War, Grandaddy was gone so my Dad was left alone to torment his three sisters and his Mother the whole time. And you better believe they loved him for it. My Grandfather would say "that boy can make me angrier than anybody I know. " His Mother, though, well, look out. His Mother ruled the roost at less than five feet tall. When he stopped working on a boat that she had dragged him all over yonder and back for supplies, he got a lesson or two from his Mother that you finish what you start. She did not take any stuff from him.
My Dad was one colorful character . He was full of sayings. Quit worrying about the mule going blind, load the wagon. A fair deal is when you are willing to be on either side of the fence. A delay is better than a disaster. He was also full of witticisms. He was the cheerleader of a lifetime. "Did you get that sale, did you get that listing, when are you going to write that book? " He treated me like I was going to pull a one book Margaret Mitchell wonder some day.
He used to say I had surveillance on him because I would call every time he was taking a nap or starting dinner. He wanted to know where I hid the cameras so he could remove them. When it came to Redskins, though, he would call me ahead of time and tell me not to call during the game. He said if I called he would hang up because until the Redskins game was over he did not remember he had a daughter.
Somewhere along the line he started to cook on the Grill. He dubbed himself Marty in his ode to Martha Stewart. If he liked a food he would talk about how it was going in Grandpop's Cookbook. It would send me right in to orbit. Since when did he become a cooking expert? It was not until we started cleaning out the office that we found just under a dozen plain brand new boxed cookbooks ready for "Marty" to complete.
Then there was also the side of him that I can best explain in one scene. We visited a widow of one of his former beloved Boat Company employees. I was the last one to file out the room behind him. "Tightwad " took the neatly folded hundred dollar bill he saved in his wallet for emergencies and tucked it in to the palm of her hand silently and quietly as we all left. I just happened to be last in line as we filed out the door to see. This from the man who was out picking up and bringing home McDonalds and Taco Bell for my Mom the very last night.
The story that stands out most in my mind was the time my Mom, Dad and I were taking Sport and Trevor Triever to Dog Obedience School. Somehow or another, their Beagle, Sport, was so excited jumping up and down that Sport hit the door lock and yes, locked himself in the car with the windows up. Well my Mom and I were watching and we started laughing. The more we laughed the angrier my Dad got. He got so angry that he just wanted to leave in another vehicle and proceed to Dog Obedience School. How he expected to go to Dog Obedience School without his dog escaped us. So the angrier he got the more we laughed. I remember laughing until we could not breathe and until tears were rolling down our cheeks. We finally laid down on the porch floor we were laughing so hard.
One of the things I would hear him say quite often was that home was where My Mom and his Dog were. As long as he could be with them, that was home to him. But, right about now, for the time being, I figure he is fishing with Ralph. After all, they fished every night on the beach for one summer or two until they finally outlasted the fish and caught a few. He is also with the Old Bat getting a laugh at how she got him back with that all night horn around Christmas. Grandaddy is talking to himself about that Boy and I am sure Mitts is giving him "what for." I finally figured out he is building something up there. It is a place where all great Daddys go. And noone could build it better than him.
I love you to the moon and back, Daddy. If I had to describe my Dad in one word, and just one word, it would be laughter. So Daddy whenever there is laughter, I will know for sure that you are right there with me, right at my side, laughing along with me forever and always.
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