Horror films that relate to Real Estate?
Here's the script
written by the "Director"
Some transactions are completed with demonic buyer agents that love to wrap their tail all around the listing agent’s neck with demands of blood and sacrifices.
And some of the listings I encountered over the years were possessed by the biggest devil in the world. .”THE LENDER”
In a way, I’m like “The Exorcist” I pray and I fight to drive the demon of FORECLOSURE AWAY
Sometimes I win. .
Sometime I lose. .
But in all my cases I always get green vomit all over my clothes.
So, here are some of my experiences and my participation in this horrific transactions.
The Amityville Horror (1979)
An all-American family purchases a big house with a big lot in a nice neighborhood and two windows that looks like eyes. . .for a very low interest rate in the form of negative amortization.
Then the demon awakens and they call me to save them.
Poltergeist (1982)
The American Dream: As soon as they purchase it. .. The house has a few problems. Faulty wiring - and the living room television turns on by itself. A few noises at night and suddenly. .the house implodes into a third dimension of a short sale world where months are days and days are seconds. . You may want to pass on trying to save this one unless you are equipped with all the EXORCISM TOOLS like a direct access to the supervisor of a slow negotiator.
Psycho (1960)
Taking a shower changed for me after this movie. . traumatizing shower should be taken with the door closed and hope that the lender does not send their asset protection manager to change your locks wielding a sharp screwdriver.
In this case Bates Motel is played by. .you've guessed it. .. Bank Of America.
The Exorcist (1973)
Fernando Herboso an experienced Exorcist / Short Sale Expert, is summoned by a homeowner with an underwater home. He and Karras (his assistant) try to drive the spirits of the lender away from a foreclosure. The demon threatens and taunts the short sale expert, including being physically and verbally hurtful . . .by not acknowledging their faxes and calls and taking months in some cases.
Giving them false hopes and promises that are mixed with the green vomit that is expelled in the form of a lame approval that could only benefit them.
"I order you. .in the name of the Most Powerful ACCEPT THIS SHORT SALE and let GOOD COMMON SENSE PREVAIL and bless you with its presence"
Fernando Herboso~
"The Exorcist of Short Sales"
Need Intervention?
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