Al finally decides to take a vacation. He books himself on
a Caribbean cruise and proceeds to have the time of his life -
until the boat sank. He found himself swept up on the shore of an island with
no other people, no supplies... Nothing. Only bananas and coconuts.
After about four months, he is lying on the beach one day when the most gorgeous woman he has ever seen rows up to him. I In disbelief, he asks her, "Where did you come from? How did you get here?"
"I rowed over from the other side of the island," she says. "I
landed here when my cruise ship sank."
"Amazing," he says. "You were really lucky to have a rowboat wash up
with you."
"Oh, this?" replies the woman. "I made the rowboat out of raw
material found on the island. I whittled the oars from gum tree
branches; I wove the bottom from palm branches; and the
sides and stern came from a Eucalyptus tree."
"But ... but ... that's impossible," stutters Al "You had no tools
or hardware. How did you manage?"
"Oh, no problem," replies the woman. "On the South side of the
island, there is a very unusual strata of alluvial rock exposed. I found if I fired it to a certain temperature in my kiln, it melted into forgeable ductile iron. I used that for tools and used the tools to make the hardware." Tom is stunned.
"Let's row over to my place," she says.
After a few minutes of rowing, she docks the boat at a small wharf.
As Al looks onto shore, he nearly falls out of the boat.
Before him is a stone walk leading to an exquisite bungalow
painted in blue and white. While the woman ties up the rowboat with
an expertly woven hemp rope, he can only stare ahead, dumbstruck.
As they walk into the house, she says casually, "It's not much, but
I call it home. Sit down, please. Would you like to have a drink?"
"No, no thank you," he says, still dazed. "Can't take any more
coconut juice." "It's not coconut juice," the woman replies. "I built a
still. How about a Pina Colada?"
Trying to hide his continued amazement, he accepts, and they sit down on her hand-woven couch to talk. After they have exchanged their stories, the woman announces, "I'm going to slip into
something more comfortable. Would you like to take a shower and
shave? There is a razor upstairs in the cabinet in the bathroom."
No longer questioning anything, Al goes into the bathroom.
There in the cabinet, is a razor made from a bone handle. Two shells honed
to a hollow-ground edge are fastened on to its end inside of a
swivel mechanism. "WOW! This woman is amazing," he muses,"what next?"
When he returns, she greets him wearing 'nothing but vines'
strategically positioned, and smelling faintly of gardenias. She
beckons for him to sit down next to her "Tell me," she begins suggestively, slithering closer to
him, "We've been out here for a really long time. I know you've been lonely.
There's something I'm sure you really feel like doing right now,
something you've been longing for all these months. You know..."
She stares into his eyes. He can't believe what he's hearing!
"You mean ...", he swallows excitedly, "We can watch the Patriots game from here?
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