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Absolutely Disgusting Behavior Requires Correction By Us

By
Real Estate Broker/Owner with MoonDancer Realty, Dillsboro,NC NC# 218097
 

By now, anyone who watches network news or any news of any sort, will have seen the video of the bus monitor by heckled and abused by the three teenagers. The video went viral on YouTube and was an absolutely disgusting display of bad behavior by three male teenage miscreants. This was bullying taken to an extreme level.

Bullies make me sick anyway but in a school setting or school bus setting, more typical bullying behavior (I thought) was among a peer group. Stupid bullies picking on other kids and making their lives miserable because of size, weight, clothing, whatever perceived difference there is that makes the bullies feel entitled to be cruel. Maybe this bad phenomena of bullying is even worse than we thought, there just hasn’t been a stupid enough bully yet to (1) video the attack and (2) proudly post it to YouTube!

The female bus monitor who was the target of the bullying assault was 68 years old. These teenagers verbally abused her for more than 10 minutes and felt free to attack her on many fronts. Nothing was spared. They must have felt so brave being so cruel in front of their schoolmates. They even taunted her about her adult son who had committed suicide.

The other kids on the bus did nothing. Nothing! No doubt one reason is self-preservation, they don’t want to be the next target. Don’t they understand that until someone risks that outcome, this type of savagery continues. In my opinion, these three boys not only should face criminal charges and consequences but should be publicly condemned and shunned by the village. Non violent societies often would settle atrocious behavior from their neighbors by absolute shunning and casting out those who behaved so badly.

Can you believe there is a silver lining to this disturbing story? Since the video was out in the public domain, millions of people commented…some just with words and others personally responded with videos of themselves doing exactly what villagers of yesterday would have done, publicly condemned the boys for their behavior. Social media is a double edged sword, sometimes I think it is pulling away our “humanity” and other times I think it might be restoring it. These boys’ “peers” around the world did exactly what the other kids on the bus didn’t dare do, told these punks in the most public of forums that their behavior was unacceptable.

Two other silver linings of note. The father of one of the boys instead of shielding himself and his family behind a “no comment”, chose to also publicly condemn his son for this shocking behavior. I know he still loves his son and acknowledging his son’s participation in this act of cruelty was probably one of the most painful things he’s ever done…next to admitting to the world his utter disappointment in his own child. The other silver lining is the gentleman who started a campaign to raise money to send the bus monitor on a vacation and to show her moral support. He had hoped to raise $5,000 and when I went to bed last night, the tally so far was $300,000. The strength of social media restoring humanity.

Bullying is always absolutely disgusting behavior and it doesn’t matter whether it is on a school bus, boardroom, bedroom or real estate negotiation. Leslie and I talked a lot about it and hope this woman’s pain serves the greater purpose of honest conversation about all of us having the strength to speak up, even if our voice shakes and put a stop to bullying of all sorts, blatant like this situation or subtle like the use of slurs against any ethnicity, gender, age, weight or handicap status during normal conversations. We should be better than this.

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Gene Riemenschneider
Home Point Real Estate - Brentwood, CA
Turning Houses into Homes

These kids should be expelled and they deserve a good old fashioned trip to the wood shed.  

Jun 23, 2012 01:38 PM
Margaret Rome Baltimore 410-530-2400
HomeRome Realty 410-530-2400 - Pikesville, MD
Sell Your Home With Margaret Rome

Horrible treatment but even more disturbing is  how many others are being treated in a similar manner without any type of intervention.

Margaret

Jun 23, 2012 01:39 PM
Mona Gersky
MoonDancer Realty, Dillsboro,NC - Sylva, NC
GRI,IMSD-Taking the mystery out of real estate.

Wow.  I've been out all day and just got back at 11pm.  I appreciate all of these comments and viewpoints.

It seems we all have a similar viewpoint.  Evil flourishes when good people do nothing.  Margaret makes a good point, this was just an example of bullying we know about...who knows how often this kind of thing happens.

Jun 23, 2012 02:13 PM
Anonymous
Brian

These are small pre-pubescent children behaving badly, but hardly world newsworthy. Mayeb they need a spanking, but why are we talking about this. Let's talk about something important... Let's talk about real estate in this real estate forum. Go to YouTube to speak opinions about these little children; it fits right in there.

When I watch the news or read a blog, I want to learn what is going on with our real estate, the economy, and politics... Children acting up is fluff.

Jun 23, 2012 05:33 PM
#31
Barbara S. Duncan
RE/MAX Advantage - Searcy, AR
GRI, e-PRO, Executive Broker, Searcy AR

Good blog.  Kids can be so mean.  I taught school and saw it happen often. 

Jun 23, 2012 09:51 PM
Mona Gersky
MoonDancer Realty, Dillsboro,NC - Sylva, NC
GRI,IMSD-Taking the mystery out of real estate.

Bruce, thanks for your opinion - we're all entitled to one.  Aren't you glad I gave you a forum to express yours?

Barbara, my guess is that some of them even grew up to be aggressive and bullying style REALTORS.  I appreciate you adding substance to the fluff discussion ;-D

Jun 23, 2012 10:00 PM
Amanda S. Davidson
Amanda Davidson Real Estate Group Brokered By Real - Alexandria, VA
Alexandria Virginia Homes For Sale

Mona- I caught the tail end of this story on the news and then went to youtube to watch the whole video. Their behavior was atrocious. Proof that over the years bullying has become worse. This wouldn't have gone on at the level it did when I was in school. I agree that shunning is likely the only way to teach these kids a lesson. The parents with no comment are part of the problem. I also think it's sad that the bus driver likely didn't stop in fear of the school not backing her up and/or parents sueing. So many lessons to be learned here. Great job on your post!

Jun 23, 2012 10:07 PM
Mona Gersky
MoonDancer Realty, Dillsboro,NC - Sylva, NC
GRI,IMSD-Taking the mystery out of real estate.

Amanda, thanks. The discussion is only the beginning of the solution.  The sooner people are brave enough to let the tormentors know that their behavior will no longer be tolerated by their peers and society, then the sooner we can get rid of bullies.

Jun 23, 2012 10:44 PM
Nina Hollander, Broker
Coldwell Banker Realty - Charlotte, NC
Your Greater Charlotte Realtor

Parents need to start parenting and teaching their children manners... as an early baby boomer, myself, I'm disgusted by how many baby boomers and their children have decided that "anything goes" in our society, that they should be their childrens' friends, and how little anyone teaches younger people to have respect for older people. Nina

Jun 23, 2012 10:54 PM
Bob Miller
Keller Williams Cornerstone Realty - Ocala, FL
The Ocala Dream Team

Hi Mona, I agree.  A similar incident happened here in Ocala Florida but it was other students attacking a student and the bus driver did not stop it.

Jun 23, 2012 11:53 PM
Mona Gersky
MoonDancer Realty, Dillsboro,NC - Sylva, NC
GRI,IMSD-Taking the mystery out of real estate.

Nina, it takes a village but starts with family.

Bob, how sad is that?

Jun 23, 2012 11:58 PM
Mike Cooper, Broker VA,WV
Cornerstone Business Group Inc - Winchester, VA
Your Neighborhood Real Estate Sales Pro

Mona, I watched an interview with this woman last night, and she is very gracious about the whole thing.  By the way, that send a bus monitor on vacation fund was at $500.000 as of yesterday.  I have a feeeling, she's saying bye-bye to the little yellow bus.  8-)

Jun 24, 2012 12:27 AM
Mona Gersky
MoonDancer Realty, Dillsboro,NC - Sylva, NC
GRI,IMSD-Taking the mystery out of real estate.

Mike, that is good news.  This lady has a grace that I hope those three boys can learn to emulate.  Sort of hope they say by-bye to bus also and learn to walk.

Jun 24, 2012 01:17 AM
Steve Facella
ReMax Prestige - Lake Worth, FL

You are so right. I was bullied through most of my school years. When I watched the video of the incident on You Tube it brought all of that back. Those kids really need to find out how it feels to be treated like that. It will stop then from doing it again!

Jun 24, 2012 01:40 AM
Thomas McCombs
Century 21 HomeStar - Akron, OH

What training has the bus monitor had?  It would seem to me that she should have had some preapproved action to take in this kind of situation. The fact that she just sat there and took it puzzled me a little bit.

I did not watch the video, but I have been a school bus driver so I have an idea of the situation.

The situation should be used as a teaching aid in all schools.

Jun 24, 2012 02:47 AM
Leslie G. Rojohn
MoonDancer Realty - Sylva, NC
GRI, ABR ~ MoonDancer Realty

The fund for this lady has now reached well over $600,000.  And to the "gentleman" who e-mailed you directly rather than comment on this forum, implying that one of the voices of the bullies was female. he is incorrect.  All of them were boys.  I guess he has never heard the voices of early pubescent boys.  That is not to say that girls can't be bullies too, just not in this case.

Jun 24, 2012 04:03 AM
Mona Gersky
MoonDancer Realty, Dillsboro,NC - Sylva, NC
GRI,IMSD-Taking the mystery out of real estate.

Steve, that just goes to show you that it is very difficult to leave the memories of this kind of treatment behind you.

Thomas, agreed. I don't know what kind of training she's had...maybe none.  I don't know what the town is like that she lives in, maybe there is a high incidence of teen violence.  She was probably fearful.  Most women were never raised to defend themselves.   It is always puzzling to those who raised to do so.

Leslie, we've talked a lot about this and about people turning a blind eye to bad behavior. We all need to be ever vigilant.

Jun 24, 2012 08:01 AM
Lyn Sims
Schaumburg, IL
Real Estate Broker Retired

The whole situation was very disappointing that no one challenged these boys with their bad behavior.

Jun 24, 2012 08:53 AM
Mona Gersky
MoonDancer Realty, Dillsboro,NC - Sylva, NC
GRI,IMSD-Taking the mystery out of real estate.

Lyn, yes.  Challenging without confronting would be an excellent skill.

Jun 24, 2012 10:01 AM
John DL Arendsen
CREST "BACKYARD' HOMES, ON THE LEVEL General & Manufactured Home Contractor, TAG Real Estate Sales & Investments - Leucadia, CA
Crest Backyard Homes "ADU" dealer & RE Developer

So many kids today are spoiled brats with too much idle time on their hands and an overwhelming since of entitlement. During the War of Independence and Civil war 13 year old boys were fighting and dying on the front lines for their Country. Today kids have a nervous breakdown if their computer stalls while playing war videos with their friends. Great post.

Jul 13, 2012 01:14 AM