As a Realtor one thing you can be sure of is that no matter how prepared you may be, you never know what to expect. A motivated seller who has to relocate may inexplicably reject a full-price cash offer. A buyer who has spent a year focused on buying new construction in a suburban subdivision for his young family may instead opt for a fixer-upper in an urban neighborhood. The pre-approved, highly qualified buyer you’ve worked with for months may have an accepted offer then end up not being able to secure financing. Hopefully our life experiences have helped prepare us to embrace the unexpected. I learned that lesson years ago.
I was certain I knew just what to expect. As a hospice volunteer I had spent countless hours with people who, in the final days and weeks of their lives, reflected on their life’s work, their families and the paths they had traveled. I had been briefed of the fact that thirty year old Juan had arrived at the suburban nursing home from the gritty streets of a crime-ridden city in New Jersey. On the way to meet him for the first time I was confident that I knew how he would feel and I prepared myself for his anger, frustration and self-pity.
Within minutes of our first meeting Juan told me that several years as an intravenous drug user had caught up with him and he was dying of AIDS. He had no other visitors: his wife and children had abandoned him when he became ill and his friends on the streets could not find a way to get to him. It seemed that Juan had very little in his life to console him and the best I could do was to distract him from his misery.
I could not have been more wrong. Juan was lonely, very sick and…elated. Accustomed to living on the streets, he couldn’t believe he was now in a warm, safe room. When he felt up to it he would take a long, hot shower, and he often marveled at the fact that he could order all of the meals and snacks he wanted. Juan spent much of each day telling staff members and other patients how lucky he felt to be in this place. He called friends and boasted of his good fortune. Juan had gone to the nursing home to die, and there he found unfamiliar comfort, dignity and peace. I have never seen anyone live their final days with the glee and gratitude that I saw in Juan.
I only knew him for a few months yet, looking back, I realize how Juan changed me. He taught me that one’s reaction to an experience is shaped largely by their perspective. He also showed me that joy can be found in the most unexpected places.
In a world of uncertainty there are few times that we know exactly what lies ahead of us. The best we can do – all of us, in every facet of our personal lives and careers - is embrace the unexpected, adapt to it, and go from there.
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