It’s Blooper Friday! Heat really does affect the brain, my friends. Check out these bloopers if you want to know how a brain looks when sun-baked and enebriated. Thanks to Coldwell Banker colleague Michael Jacobs of Pasadena, and Jane Peters of Los Angeles for some truly hilarious finds.

Synapse Lapse

“Come see beaulort” (Bueller? Bueller?)

“Garden w/ decomposition” (It seems the skeletons are out of the closet…and into the yard.)

“New rat just added to drive” (New roadkill just added to tire.)

“Please don’t disturd” ('Disturd'??? That's one more listing that just went into the crapper.)

“Must have food FICOs” (Hooray - a chance for gluttonous Americans to eat our way back to an AAA credit rating!)

Cerebral Tilt

“View of marlina and docks” (Attention, Marlina: The Fifth Fleet will not be arriving until Saturday.)

“Cross over bride” ( Does the bride by chance live in West Hollywood's Boys Town?)

“Bald colors” (That would be flesh-tone in the winter, beet red in the summer, right?)

“Long cement dive” (That’s called a belly-flop in most circles.)

“Push crapet” (Let me guess - Doctor's orders to your mother when she was in labor with you?)

Mold on the Lobes?

“Open floor leaving room” (Last of sanity leaving agent...)

“Costume blind” (Oh boy - Trick or treat with Helen Keller!)

"New roof and garters" (Well, that should give you a leg up over the neighbors!)

"Just reduced - will sell fat" (Buy now - her rejection is your injection!)

Auto-Fill Folly of the Week… Maybe the Year!

“Open foreplay, hardwood just in” (Marlina, it seems the Fleet really has arrived.)

 

That’s it for this week, folks. Remember: Spell well and Sell! For more real estate humor, please visit Gwen at www.sherlockofhomes.blogspot.com/ or Agent Genius. For all your real estate needs, please go to www.LAhomesite.com.

Please visit www.victorylodgeinfo.com to see my magnificent listing: "Reduced: $14,900,000 Log Cabin Estate." Also: "Stunning Spanish Villa Atop Mt Washington - $999,000" @ www.tourfactory.com/881759 ; and "Whitley Heights Investment Properties - $3.3M" @ http://youtu.be/PW6lstI9Yug . Thank you!

 
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47 Comments on “Push crapet!” Trying To Push Crappola Uphill With MLS Bloopers?

20 Most Recent Comments Displayed Show All

AUG
03
173,944 Points 18 Featured Posts Outside Blog

Jay, maybe the fat hawker plans to sell it to the automotive industry. I am not sure what extraction technique may have been used, but I sure wish I could figure out a way to sell my own fat. I could retire.

 

Carol, I hope your laughter lasts all weekend!

 

Dorie, it's always wonderful to hear from you. For me, it's like a little party every Friday.

 

Andrea, the owners can't be too bright either. After all, they hired these nonprofessional yokels. I may be dumber than a lot of these blooper perps, but at least I double-check everyting. Uh, "everything" :-)
1:13pm • #28
173,944 Points 18 Featured Posts Outside Blog

Kathryn, you're right. I may start hanging out with Marlina!

 

Dick, that one cracked me up. What a hilarious juxtaposition of two sentences. That one rivaled the last one!
1:16pm • #29
173,944 Points 18 Featured Posts Outside Blog

Mike, alert the Enquirer - you may be onto something! I suspect Amelia is there, too. I will pass along your suggestion to Starbucks. Adding extra cream and sugar after the fact could be a challenge, but I am sure you'll come up with something :-)

 

Jason, yes - I post these every Friday (unless I am inebriated on a beach somewhere...which is always a possibility considering I live in California and am a lush.) The Blooper Blog has been going strong for over three years, so be sure to subscribe to the party.
1:22pm • #30
173,944 Points 18 Featured Posts Outside Blog

Andrew, are you assuming the perp has not already lost his mind? How generous of you!
1:23pm • #31
493,908 Points 75 Featured Posts Outside Blog Called Shot Master

From one lush to another, Cheers!
2:12pm • #32
552,719 Points 20 Featured Posts Outside Blog Called Shot Master

Gwen~ They get better and better every week! I think these folks are writing these after a few adult beverages!
4:30pm • #33
173,944 Points 18 Featured Posts Outside Blog

Salud, Jason!
4:39pm • #34
173,944 Points 18 Featured Posts Outside Blog

Donna. I am sure you are right - and they have been opening the cans by slamming them against their heads!
4:40pm • #35
632,359 Points 3 Featured Posts Outside Blog Attended Rain Camp

Hello Gwen,

Another fabulous list (thank you, thank you, thank you)...and I agree, your pick for folly of the week should probably win as folly of the year!  
4:40pm • #36
173,944 Points 18 Featured Posts Outside Blog

Lisa, just when you think you have heard the worst, it just keeps getting better. Shock and awe!
5:31pm • #37
1,913,954 Points 386 Featured Posts Localism Sponsor Outside Blog Attended Rain Camp Called Shot Master

Ah, Gwen!  I look forward to this each Friday.  Luckily, I didn't find any of mine in today's compilation.  I even spell check my comments on this post.
7:48pm • #38
408,943 Points 19 Featured Posts Outside Blog Called Shot Master

This always makes me laugh! Thank you for the chuckle.
10:37pm • #39
173,944 Points 18 Featured Posts Outside Blog

Patricia, you'd be amazed at how many bloopers I see in the comments. However, I look the other way because they are not listing remarks...and because I make a few gaffes myself!
10:41pm • #40
173,944 Points 18 Featured Posts Outside Blog

Thanks for commenting, Melissa. Have a great weekend!
10:42pm • #41
AUG
04
632,359 Points 3 Featured Posts Outside Blog Attended Rain Camp

Good morning Gwen,

So true, shock and awe...what's scary - another one could come in that beats that comment for the "winner" of the year (oh no!)
5:36am • #42
173,944 Points 18 Featured Posts Outside Blog

You are so right, Lisa - and I think I just found it for next week's blog! Prior to this, my favorites were: "Live next to the Hollywood Bowel," (my local favorite) and "Large wood dick for entertaining." Classics!
11:48am • #43
762,298 Points 69 Featured Posts Outside Blog Attended Rain Camp Called Shot Master

Isn't it just amazing that there is so much fodder every week. Let's hope new inventory brings articulate agents.
6:25pm • #44
173,944 Points 18 Featured Posts Outside Blog

Jane, I just love your optimism - especially considering where we live.  I'll settle for more inventory!
6:44pm • #45
AUG
07
340,603 Points 8 Featured Posts Outside Blog Called Shot Master

How did this not get suggested? That open foreplay one is really hilarious.
6:37pm • #46
AUG
08
173,944 Points 18 Featured Posts Outside Blog

Jill, thank you. Join us every Friday for the Blooper Scooper!
1:11am • #47

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Gwen Banta

Los Angeles, CA

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Sotheby's International Realty

Address: 9255 Sunset Blvd, Mezzanine, West Hollywood, CA, 90069

Office Phone: (310) 205-0305 x 140

Cell Phone: (323) 252-1700

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A very humorous Blog that highlights gaffes from the MLS and real estate ad bloopers.


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