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Want To Sell Your Home? The first step is letting go emotionally.....

By
Real Estate Broker/Owner with Metro Life Homes RS-78439 / BRE #01708344

Want To Sell Your Home?  The first step is letting go emotionally.....

There are many decisions and plans that have to be made prior to putting your home up for sale.  Many of these decisions are based upon the logistics of your life:  Why do you want to move?  Where do you want to move?  What is the mathematical equation that is present for you?

In my experience as an agent assisting homeowners in making some of these decisions, I've found that there is one critical aspect that must be completed as a foundation to making your goals happen:



In order to make the decision to sell your home and find a buyer to purchase it, you must recognize that your property is going to be a NEW HOME FOR SOMEONE ELSE.

You must pave the way for your home to become somone else's home.

Do not become offended when people come into your home and are not fond of your choice of decor.  Do not become offended when people come into your home and look through rooms and closets to figure out how their life could possibly transcend into this home.  Do not become offended when a potential buyer wants to remodel what took you years to create.

IT WILL NO LONGER BE YOUR HOME.  IT WILL BE SOMEONE ELSE'S HOME.

All of the memories you've created in this home will be yours forever.  In your own mind.  With your own set of photographs and home movies.  In the minds and memories of your family and friends.

THAT is the most important part of the life you've created in this home.  NOT the structure of wood, metal, stucco that is called a house.  This home is just a temporary shell for that life experience that can be claimed by no one else but yourself, regardless of who dwells in this structure in the future.

It is time for someone else to start creating their own memories in this home, and you must submit to that if there's any chance at all with you completing your goal of selling this home and creating a life in another home.

If you cannot emotionally dis-attach yourself from the home, not only will it show, but the energy you'll be putting out there will prohibit the sale of your home.  It will inhibit those around you that you've hired to be part of the team that will assist you with getting from point A to point B from doing their job.

It will show in how the home viewings are conducted, it will show in your negotations, and it will show in many places that are critical to creating an environment conducive to successfully selling your home.

You must keep your eye on the prize at all times:  A new life that you're wanting to create for yourself that involves selling this home.

Once you've emotionally let go of the property, then you're home-free (no pun intended).  Everything else is details.

All the Best,

 

 

Comments (41)

Praful Thakkar
LAER Realty Partners - Andover, MA
Andover, MA: Andover Luxury Homes For Sale

Congratulations for well deserved feature, Ralph. (And it seems you are busy helping someone detach their emotions...lol)

Aug 29, 2012 03:04 PM
Bryan Dasilva
ForeclosureDataBank.com - Miami, FL

Exactly! This is a problem every agent has to face while making decisions with their clients. Very very much logical writing. Thanks for sharing!

Aug 29, 2012 05:02 PM
Amanda Christiansen
Christiansen Group Realty (260)704-0843 - Fort Wayne, IN
Christiansen Group Realty

I agree Ralph.  As hard as that may be sometimes, you have to let go.  It's not your home anymore.  It's an item for sale.  Great post and congrats on the feature!  

Aug 29, 2012 09:19 PM
Barbara Heise
Keller Williams Realty STL - Saint Louis, MO
Search for Homes for Sale in St. Louis

Nice article - our emotions are interesting to keep in control.

 

Aug 29, 2012 09:33 PM
Brian Kuhns
Coldwell Banker Roth Wehrly Graber - Fort Wayne, IN
Fort Wayne Real Estate by Brian Kuhns

great post. I would probalby be my own worst enemy if I had to sell my home, but you are right that sellers have the memories that no one can ever take away from them even with the sale of their home. Congrats on the feature

Aug 29, 2012 10:17 PM
Andrew Mooers | 207.532.6573
MOOERS REALTY - Houlton, ME
Northern Maine Real Estate-Aroostook County Broker

Good luck, real estate is an emotional experience. Your heart gets involved and your head is not the only one making decisions, charting the course. Unless you are Vulcan, wearing the blue and gold "R".

Aug 29, 2012 10:54 PM
Morgan Evans
Douglas Elliman Real Estate - Manhattan, NY
LICENSED REAL ESTATE SALESPERSON

Great advice, its almost never easy to seperate the emotional attachment from a home that somebody has been living in for years and years, but like you mention its a crucial aspect in order to help the next buyer.

Aug 29, 2012 10:59 PM
Michael Setunsky
Woodbridge, VA
Your Commercial Real Estate Link to Northern VA

Ralph, this is so true, but sometimes it is very difficult to let go of that emotional attachment. This often makes our job more difficult.

Aug 29, 2012 11:17 PM
Jeffrey DiMuria 321.223.6253 Waves Realty
Waves Realty - Melbourne, FL
Florida Space Coast Homes

emotional attachment is the biggest reason I do not allow my clients to be at homes when buyers come.

Aug 29, 2012 11:36 PM
Donna Derrick Ponte Vedra Beach, Jax Beach FL
Ponte Vedra Beach, FL

Great blog and so true! Have a great day!

Aug 30, 2012 12:33 AM
Myrl Jeffcoat
Sacramento, CA
Greater Sacramento Realtor - Retired

Excellent advice, Ralph!  I once had a client that needed to "let go" of a lot of belongings before getting their home market ready.  She had been in the home well over 25 years and was a bit of a packrat.  It was a a couple of weeks of having a garage sale and giving old belongings to charities, before she was ready to really paint and have new carpet installed.  Once the place was tidied up, and looking really great, she didn't want to sell any more:-)  She stayed for an addition year or so, until I finally got the call to come list her property!

Aug 30, 2012 01:03 AM
Ralph Gorgoglione
Metro Life Homes - Palm Springs, CA
California and Hawaii Real Estate (310) 497-9407

OMG, Myrl.  That is too funny!

Aug 30, 2012 01:13 AM
Rosalie Evans
Meritus Group Real Estate - Sioux Falls, SD
The Evans Group, Sioux Falls, SD Homes For Sale

This is so touchy with some people too! The people that painted the wall to match with nana's quilt and are offended that anyone couldn't love that wall color! Or the collecters that have knick knacks all around that are such a good distractor or the property for sale. People get very attached to homes and who can balme them when so many memories are lived there. 

Aug 30, 2012 04:02 AM
Liz Wallace
Century 21 Sherlock Homes - Rockville Centre, NY
Broker C21 Sherlock Homes, Rockville Centre, LI, N

This is an excellent post and very timely for me.  Real Estate 101, what is the motivation?.

Aug 30, 2012 06:11 AM
Donna Foerster
HomeSmart Realty Group - Parker, CO
Metro Denver Real Estate Assistant

Great post Ralph.  That's the truly hard part, detaching yourself emotionally.  I love how you explain that the memories are yours forever and that they are not apart of the physical HOUSE.

Aug 30, 2012 06:55 AM
Sandy Acevedo
951-290-8588 - Chino Hills, CA
RE/MAX Masters, Inland Empire Homes for Sale

Hi Ralph, so true. It definitely shows that you can't let go during the negotiations, on what you are willing to give up.

Aug 30, 2012 08:08 AM
Evelyn Kennedy
Alain Pinel Realtors - Alameda, CA
Alameda, Real Estate, Alameda, CA

Ralph:

I use the term, "Don't think of your home as a home, it has now become a commodity."  Kinda harsh, but the sooner the seller realize that they have to move on they become ready to emotionally sell their house.  That is why I like to stage a house because that involves changing the house.

Aug 30, 2012 08:25 AM
Lou Ludwig
Ludwig & Associates - Boca Raton, FL
Designations Earned CRB, CRS, CIPS, GRI, SRES, TRC

Ralph

Your post is right on target. A lot a sellers have a very difficult time in letting go of their when it time to sell.

Good luck and success.

Lou Ludwig

Aug 30, 2012 10:37 AM
Ken Brandon
Coldwell Banker Sea Coast Advantage (Jacksonville, NC) - Jacksonville, NC
Camp Lejeune, Jacksonville, NC

Excellent post! It is the real estate professional's job to explain this to their seller clients in an empathetic...but clear way...so this shift in mindset can begin.

Aug 30, 2012 11:46 AM
Mike Warren
Real Estate - Colorado Springs, CO

I agree. This is so true. Letting go emotionally is the first step you must do when you want to sell your home. We all know that it is hard but we must accept that it will find its new owner. Great post.

Aug 30, 2012 12:03 PM