It's Thanksgiving Week and for all of the turkeys in our lives, I say we should celebrate. Let's have a great narcoleptic inducing meal followed by reflections of the turkeys we love to talk about on the Blogosphere and Active Rain. For instance:
- The Bloated Price Turkey - full of visions of unconscious buyers just looking for an opportunity to spend 30% more than the market demands. They will ignore all good reason, a perfect CMA and just plain ole common sense to show they know the market better than the professionals.
- The Anorexic Turkey- who knows that the 50% off market priced house is out there waiting for them to throw cash at it if their agent could just get his/her act together and find it. After all, Billie Bob's Pennies on the Dollar Way to Real Estate Wealth Seminar and Trulia and Zillow promised it was there. So, go find it Realtor!
- The High Expectations Turkey - who believes a good agent can sell their barn with a simple turn of a phase like, "Spacious country living, cathedral ceilings, views of wildlife and plenty of room to expand. Open floor plan with original tall solid wood sliding doors and wide plank hardwood floors. Natural setting."
- The Low Expectations Turkey - who wants you to drop your commission price and/or give it up completely if they find a buyer.
- The Indian Giver Turkey - who thinks you made too much because you marketed his house well and sold it in a week. Nobody should make that much money in one week. Give some back!
- The Too Fat to Move Turkey - who can't clean, landscape, pick up, paint, repair or fix anything because he's too fat to move. Or at least he acts like he's too fat to move because he never does.
- The Counter Culture Turkey - who counters every offer no matter how good or how bad it is. That's the way you play the game, right? This turkey can't understand why he doesn't have his house under contract. It must be our bargain hunting culture.
- The Academic Turkey - who knows everything about your job and is constantly calling and asking why you're not doing . . . . . .
- The Co-Dependent Turkey - who calls everyday to see how you are, and to share her problems with you. You become her agent and her therapist.
- The Traveling Turkey - who looks at 100 houses only to return to the first one you showed him. You realize after closing that it cost you $300 more in fuel than your commission check.
- The Volcanic Turkey - who blows up every time a buyer/seller asks for any concessions, signatures or even a light. This buyer/seller is determined to get the deal he wants even if it costs you your sanity.
- The Vampire Turkey - who plans to suck the sellers dry because he knows they're in trouble financially since they're desperate enough to short sale. They'll do anything to sell.
- The Turduckin Turkey - This turkey is a combination of the turkey (see all above), a duck who is never able to make up his mind so he ducks decisions, and a chicken who is afraid he's doing the wrong thing. No matter how much encouragement you give him, he does nothing. He looks and looks and looks, but he never pulls the trigger.
- The Dictator Turkey - who thinks he owns you. He expects you to jump every time he calls, texts or emails. Since he's in charge, he expects you to drop everything right now to respond to his wishes. He gets infuriated if it takes any time to hear from you.
- The Tender Turkey - who is so happy that you helped him find the house of his dreams that he tells everyone what a great Realtor you are, and he makes sure he lets you know.
So, as drift off into a food induced coma, count the turkeys in your life and have a good nap. Happy Thanksgiving!