Home : Blogs : Missy Caulk-Ann Arbor- Realtor(R)- Ann Arbor Real Estate : Ann Arbor and Saline Michigan Real Estate

My Heart is Heavy...

Most of you know, I am a listing agent with four buyer agents. Buying a home in today’s market is wonderful. Buyers are able to get some great homes for very good prices, something maybe out of their price range several years ago. Buyers are fun to work with they are so excited when they find their future home.

You can see the light in their eyes and a smile on their face when they know it is the house for them.

Broken heart I am sad, like a big weight on my shoulders after I meet with sellers and do their Comparative Market Analysis. I hate to tell them the truth. I tell them the truth, but I hate it.

They purchased their homes with smiles on their faces and hope for a wonderful future. Then life happens, they get laid off by the “Big 3”, they get a job transfer, their company closes down, they finish medical school and are ready to start their careers, whatever….

Then the bad news, their home has not gone up in value, but decreased in value.

Many parts of the country, are only experiencing this down-turn since 2006 or 2007. We have been going through it in Michigan since 2001, before 9-11.

In Michigan, “The Big 3” started laying people off in their effort to restructure the automobile industry. When you live in an area, that is so dominate on one industry it trickles down and touches other companies that make “things” for the cars. Like mirrors, screws, dash boards, etc…

I am a positive person, I think ya’ll know that. I had a great year in 2007, personally. But, even so….. I am sad………so sad……….sometimes all this mess just gets to me. My heart is heavy.

I want my sellers to be able to at least break even on their house in this market; but most have to “bring in money” to close on their houses. I’ve had Physicians bring in up to $25,000.00 to close on their house. That is sad to me.

I did a CMA, today for a wonderful family that I sold a house to in 2004. She was starting Medical School at University of Michigan. They bought a house that needed work. Boy, did they do it, new windows, new roof, refinished hardwood floors, new Jacuzzi tub, crown moldings, interior doors, new deck, remodeled bathroom with high end ceramic. The house is impeccable!

I can’t sell their home for what they paid in 2004, even with ALL the upgrades. That makes me sad……….

I have a client who gave up a good teaching position teaching here to go teach in Africa. We are 50,000 below what she paid in 2005, and it still has not sold. She is sacrificing in more ways than one.

I know we have to sell in any market, but Dad-Gummet this is sad. I feel so sorry and heart-broken for my sellers.

Thanks for letting me express my sadness.

I know some of you go through this too.

***Guess this won’t go in Sally’s group, Positive Attitude for the Weary Soul.***

Posted by Missy Caulk-Ann Arbor- Realtor(R)- Ann Arbor Real Estate on 02/04/2008 07:38 PM

Comments (60)

down turn in the market, michigan, sellers

60 Comments on My Heart is Heavy...

FEB

2008

Missy, I feel your pain. I feel it, because I too bought in 2006 and have lost about 70k in my personal home. I am in a little different position for I am not selling at this point. I hope things work out for your friends.

I know exactly how you feel, sometimes I think we do more hand holding and couselling than selling. The other side of the coin out here in the Sacramento area is buyers who feel they have all the negotiating power making low offers on home where there is no equity and the sellers can't sell because they don't have the cash to make up the shorftall (unless they sell their Mercedes, boat or summer home).

Missy.... yes, I have gotten to know you in the years time and I can feel your pain. I am going through some of this when a client can't even refinance or sell their home and might be a foreclosure statistic in 8 months or so. And this is a family that has two adults with 4 jobs between the 2 of them. I just can't imagine what you are going through up there, being in that type of market for 6 years or so.... In any case, it's good to get this stuff off of our chests... thanks for sharing this.

As an agent that over the years has grown into an expert in short sales I have had to over and over again tell sells there is no money in the sale of their home. What I remind them is that they have to first focus on their health,safety,and family and if they protect their credit then can again have home. But right now through no falt of their own, the market fell apart and its best to sellshort and move on

I'm glad that we have this place to share pain as well as the joys, Missy. You're feeling sad because you have a big heart. Bad news is never easy, but it's even worse when it is so financially and emotionally big as in the roof over your head.

It is a very difficult market for many. I hope that most people have bought within their budget and have adequate reserves - Most of the people in my area who bought 4 or 5 years ago are just fine -- It is mostly those who bought recently or who got into those crazy loan programs are suffering. I know some parts of the country are worse than others. Prices in southern New Hampshire have not dropped as much as other parts of the country and we have far fewer foreclosures and short sales.

Missy-yes it is sad when sellers with a legitimate need to sell find themselves in a short sale situation. All we can do is help them understand all of the options and support them through the process.

Hi Missy - that is one of the things I really dislike so much about our jobs. it hurts to have to tell someone their greatest asset has gone down in value, and it hurts to look at them as you tell them that bad news. I didn't realize your market had been like that all that time. That, in itself, makes for heavy hearts, too, I would think.

Keep doing the great job you do for all those people who turn to you for help, and be as positive as you can be, which I know you are.

Ann

Missy - a ((((hug)))) goes a long way...

Missy, I think we all can understand how you feel. I got a call yesterday while running some errands and told the woman that I'd call her back. I think she knew what my answer was going to be and didn't answer the phone. But there was nothing that I could do for them. They way overpaid for an investment home and financed 100%. I wish there were something I can do for them, but alas... I will still try to contact them let them know some alternatives.

It is, indeed, sad. But, in many markets, sellers need to get on with it because it might get a lot worse. We read daily about sellers who overprice their home and then 6 months later, the house is worth less.

Getting those prices down is so hard. Our buyers are just negotiating the prices down. Foreclosures are bring them down too.

Missy,

'Dad-Gummet'...my wife's favorite expletive! Frustration is good to share with friends...we have a couple of areas that have experienced massive closings and/or layoffs...nowhere near what you have experienced in Michigan...I have witnessed one of these go full circle in about 20 years, and the other is just beginning to make the necessary changes. 'Denial' can be a problem with local government as much as it is with individuals...in both cases the turnaround could have been expedited if civic authorities would have gotten past the denial phase...recovery can come quickly when everyone cooperates to bring it about...but they must get past the denial phase first! Keep trying...don't give up, dad-gummet! Thanks, Fran

I am glad to know you are the one helping them. I would hate for it to be someone with NO heart at all. It's sad but I am sure they appreciate the news coming from you. Hang in there.

Frank, I'm in the same boat as everyone else in Michigan, but I just don't have to sell right now.

Lenn, you are right, MOST of the sellers are realistic here, the market just keeps going down, I got price reductions all weekend and no one gave me any grief.

Marc, I know you'll reach them, it is so hard for people to hear the truth.

Linda, Thank you girlfriend, I needed that..........seriously.

Ann, yea it has been a long time.

Cindy, I have 2 right now and they are no fun either, both sellers willing and banks...well you know.

Joan, our prices are down to the 1998 prices.

Elaine, it is a great place to get it all out. Thanks for commenting. I know you're not here as much.

Eric, I told a bank that today. It is no fault of their own, it is just the market, I can't get what they owe.

Jeff, thanks for understanding, not my usual post, huh?

Julie, I know what you mean, even the houses that are priced really good, the buyers still come in with insulting offers. Actually that's ok, I'll deal and negotiate any offer to death.

You tell them the truth because you are a good agent, Missy. If values continue to fall in your area, and it sounds likely, sellers just can't afford to miss with the initial offering. By the time many are ready to listen to the market and adjust the price to where it should have been from the beginning, that price is no longer there. It has been pulled down by a sliding market. These conversations are so very difficult, and they break my heart too. In many instances, it is simply about damage control. Taking a little pain to avert major surgery. No two ways about it. It flat out sucks.

Fran, ditto!!! They (the Big 3) had many years to learn the lessons. Don't get me started on the UNIONS.We got rid of our small business tax a few months ago and darn if the legislature didn't give us another one to "supplement" it. My dad was a Buick Dealer and we went through many downturns as a family, but NOTHING like this.

Latonia, I appreciate that, I do care and people know that.

I have family that lives in Michigan and have been hearing about the down market from them for quite some time now. You have a heavy heart because clearly, you care about your clients. On the bright side, they have someone they can trust to steer them through this tough time that they're facing.

Paul, thank you for your kind comment. Good way to put it, minor surgery vs major. Although in some cases it is already major. It is so much easier to price right, the initial offering, because buyers always ask, "how long has this been on the market?"

Jeannie, thanks where does your family live? Call me if you're ever here.

My goodness Missy,

I had no idea you've been in a dificult market for so long. Ours actually peaked in about the 3rd quarter of 2005. Some, yet not all saw the first wave of change in 2006, it wasn't until last year that everyone was hit over the head with all the media.

As difficult as it has been, hopefully they been living in a nice place, received tax benefits and had a place to call home for their families. I realize most of us expect more, yet sometimes it just doesn't happens.

I know that the Michigan economy is really hurting because so many of my family still live in Michigan. It sucks, it really, really sucks. :-(

My heart is heavy for you Missy. I know how you feel, how sad it makes you feel BUT you must remember it is not you...you did not create this market. All you can do is try your best to help your clients and keep a positive attitude. It will get better....

Missy- My heart broke just reading how your esperiences are affecting you :( Yes, it is so hard to have to tell Sellers their house has lost value.....and if they have to sell, well, that breaks my hear too. Hang in there....and take care of yourself at the end of the day :) :)

Oh, Missy. I just had this discussion with one of my sellers and one of my buyers this afternoon. It's just the sadest situation in some of the circumstances. I know you're like me, tomorrow is a new day and we'll start the battle all over again.

Missy - That is really the type of news you don't want to deliver especially when you were involved with the original transaction. Sadly this is happening across the country. The drop here has not gotten to that stage and probably won't.

I've had two listing presentations in the past few days and had to give bad news to both. So I feel your pain!

The one listing I'm not interested in taking. It's a new build that they bought last August with 100% financing and the development is only about 1/4 sold. They'll never compete with the builder financing and the risk of them not having enough money to bring to closing is too great.

The second home is a possiblity. Senior citizens with considerable equity who just don't want to sell for less than they paid in 2003. They've put their home on the market for the last two summers with another agent and would like to still price it at the price it was when it didn't sell before. I gave them the price they need to be at, so we'll see whether they want to go there. I told them I wouldn't take the listing if they didn't go with my price.

It's hard to do, but we're not doing them ... or us ... any favors if we're not honest. It's equally not good to give them false hope.

Missy,

My husband and I built a spec house in 2005, we are just now finishing since we are buidling it ourselves. We have experienced the price decline and have decided to stay in the home; now's not the time to sell. Fortunately, so far anyway, we can stay in the house. Who knows what the future holds however. I am sad for anyone caught in this situation. It isn't fun.

Hi Missy,

I think this is being experienced in several markets. Here in the Illinois and Wisconsin markets real estate had been good for awhile and have not experienced the cold wave that Michigan has for as long as it has. However, things have taken a turn. I have had great friends who have had to sell their houses because of job circumstances, financial circumstances, etc., and have taken a loss. I have had friends who have had to downsize from the dream homes they had purchased when the real estate market was booming.

But through these hard knocks are lessons to be learned. I am confident things will turn around. I don't pretend to hold a crystal ball, but they will. And when they do, I think consumers will be more well informed. And my hope is that as an industry we will remember this time and play true consumer advocate and advisory roles to our clients. Always trying to remember client first, revenue second. If we remember the former, the later will follow.

Missy - this is sad - but sure gives buyers a great opportunity :o) maybe you should check out my new group buyers market :)

FEB

2008

Missy- You know we are in the same boat and even worse at ground zero. I feel your pain, Nestor feels your pain. We take on that pain from our sellers. I cried when we took a listing of a homeschool family with two beautiful girls, the dad works, the mom does her calling, stay home with the children and teaches them. It is what God wants her to do. Yet, they are going to lose their house because they made a mistake. It is sad and yet at the same time, everything happens for a reason. We all suffer the consequences of our decisions. I know about the car industry. Nestor's dad is retired from GM. They lived in Indiana from children to adults. Nestor remembers terrible things with the Union and the effects it had on their family and yet his father was so brainwashed he did not see the damage. My heart is heavy too. All we can do is pray and know that God is there for all who come to him. Our burden may be heavy but never more than we can bear.

Missy
Every time I read one of your post I learn something or take away something I can really use.
The fact that you have a heavy heart just reassures me that I am lucky to have such mentors in activerain like you.
I have to believe the compassion that you have in this Industry, the amount of effort you put into your business, and the fact that your clients and customers are really, and I mean really lucky that they have such a honest, decent, caring person working with them. with a heart as big as Michigan, has made you a house hold name which is synonymous with Real Estate in Saline.
I for one tip my hat to you because of the feelings you have that have made you what you are today.
A wonderful person.
I have the same problem when those eyes meet meet from my Sellers. Sometimes it can bring a tear to your eyes.
If you were like some it would not bother you. Fortunately for everyone you are a person that can always see past a dollar and lives their life, and does their work with nothing but sheer passion.
Thanks for being a help to me while I have been in activerain, and promise me that you will always be the Missy we have all come to enjoy and learn from.
Sincerely
Tom Braatz

Hi Missy: The last person I can remember saying "Dad Gummet" was Walter Brennan. I am sitting here trying to picture you as Walter Brennan, and it is just not working. First of all, you have much too much hair on the top of your head, and nowhere near enough facial hair. I am guessing that you don't walk with a limp, either.

But... I would guess... with you being the listing agent for your team... you not looking at all like Walter Brennan would be a good thing. See... there are some good things in your life. <grin>

Seriously, it is so hard to be called over to someone's home... and have to very diplomatically tell them that their dream of a home has turned into a nightmare. The best thing you can do is to painfully share the comps with them, and then come to a pricing decision together. That way your pricing recommendation comes from looking at the comps, not from you. Bad Comps ! Good Missy ! Whatever happens to your clients... I know they will be in good hands with you. Take care, Missy... and thanks so much for caring...

You've hit on one of the reasons I'm not a heavy listing agent. The heartache is real, it's palpable, and we have to deliver bad news to people we care about.

I don't have to tell you that you do a great job and service by telling your clients the truth. You already know that. I know though that you deliver the truth with compassion and that is something that is invaluable to your clients.

Missy, I am currently working with many short sale customers and boy is it emotionally challenging. I too hate to see people suffer through this housing downturn.

It's right to be positive but also to be realistic...being positive is one thing but you can't control a market that is still going down. I would rather turn them down now then to let them down in 3 months.

Missy,
It must be very hard for both your sellers and for you....I can't even imagine. Neal has a very good point....

Jo

Missy,
Your compassion for your clients is what makes you an agent people respect and trust. The facts are painful and my heart breaks for these people too.

Linda, that is true and something I point out. Thanks for the email suggestion.

Kelly, I know you know first hand about Michigan. :)

Monika, I know I didn't create it, and they know that too. It's just hard to keep delivering not happy news and it gets to you after awhile.

Kathy, thanks so much, I appreciate it.

Chris, yea everyday is a new day, we start over positive.

Jennifer, that is good for your area, congratulations.

Elaine, I have turned down many the last few years, I just could not justify the price in any way. But, that's ok, I would rather do that than take one and chase the market down.

Fran, I'm in that situation too. I don't need this big house anymore, but I can't afford to sell. Thankfully I don't have to.

Rebecca, so true, I love what I do and the money follows. It is cyclical and will come back.

Thesa, I joined, I thought I already had...but guess not.

Katerina, thanks so much for your kind remarks, I know you understand. So sorry about your home school friends. Yes, lots of lessons for people in this market. Although in some situations it is not their fault the market just changed. I know Realtors in the business here for 30 years that never went through a cycle like this one.

Tom, you made my day. Thank you for being supportive.

Karen, I wasn't sure where that came from, somewhere in my deep subconscious. Your right it is not my price it is the comps price, and I am using the active listings, the competition to comp it higher now.

Kris, thanks so much.

Dan, me too the suffering is hard to be around on a daily basis. But, this too shall pass.

Neal, yes I would too and then many will call you back, "come list our house, we should have listened to you." That puts a smile on my face.

Jo-Anne, he is the real deal, right. :)

Cynthia, thank you for commenting.

Missy, Unfortunately I see it too by people calling to try and sell their homes or those that want to move but don't have to are being forced to stay.....I keep hoping that it's temporary and shorter then they are predicting. I understand your heavy heart, it is difficult for me to detach from my clients too.

Well written Missy and you tell it like it is. The other side to this is that Michigan has not done enough to explain the success stories of those who stayed here in Michigan and arethriving after Ford, or GM or Chrysler. We are a not so small fraternity and we all understand each other. Kase is one of those and he is truly the happiest he has been professionally. It's just scary when one of the big three says goodbye.

Sometimes people have to move and then it is not a pretty story.

Missy--Those that are going to suffer in this changed market are those who bought in the past two years. It is very sad when they have no choice but to sell. I had a past client contact me for a relocation and when we priced their home with $80K in improvements since their purchase, they were only going to see about $30K of increased value. The had a similar loss but as they had to follow the job, they had no choice. It is incredibly sad to deliver this news to past clients. The market is harsh to those who have only owned a short time. Hard to stay positive when you are the bearer of the news.

Missy - This is certainly one of the hardest parts of the business. Nobody ever wants to hear their home is worth less than what they paid, especially when they have made additional improvements. Anyone who bought in my area in the last 3 years and is selling now will take a loss.

I think more and more of us are going through the same thing. Luckily, I have only had to do it recently - I cannot imagine going through it for years!

It is sad - very sad.

Missy, you struck a chord with me on this one. I have quite a few sellers in the same situation and it really is heartbreaking. Having to give them the bad news is not an easy thing to do. Every time I do it I wish I could find them a tenant who could pay their expenses while they wait the market out. Even that isn't the answer at times. It's hard to accept that there may be no answer other than coming to closing with funds. <<sigh>>

Missy, that was me up there. Oooops. Not logged in. Still not. LOL. Who needs the stinking points?

Maggie Dokic

Wow, Missy. If hugs can help, here's a big one from me! That's got to be a really tough thing. I've had people sell for less than they paid, but then they were turning around to buy in the same funky market and made out in the end. So I hope your doctor winds up in a hospital in a place with a really crappy market!

Missy- I so feel your sadness. It is horrible to watch this happening and have to tell them the bad news over and over. I have a seller who is closing tomorrow and is bringing several thousand to the table. I hate that for her! She needed it sold fast, she did the repairs I recommended and dropped the price when I suggested it and still it took 2 months. Several months faster than any other in the same place. Sad, so sad...

Missy, I agree that this business right now can certainly make us sad. I have so many sellers right now that are struggling to hold on to their homes and as hard as I try there is nothing I can do because they have lost so much value. It's sad and very frustrating. But all we can do is our best. So I get up everyday and get back at it.

Times are certainly difficult... I was talking to a guy just the other day that was out in Michigan on a business trip and he was telling me about entire neighborhoods that looked abandon after the factories closed down. My previous career was in machine design so I know many people involved in manufacturing and it isn't much brighter around here. Companies keep move south or overseas....

Jeannie, thanks where does your family live? Call me if you're ever here.

Missy, I have family in Livonia, Flushing and St. Clair Shores. Maybe more, but that's all I can recall off the top of my head!

FEB

2008

Missy,

Because you are a classy lady and a caring person, you feel their pain. They really couldn't be getting anyone better to help them. At least they have good stats and recommendations to move forward with. In this people business, it's really not about the money. As the book says.

List and Sell (with compassion) Gary @ RentonHomeFinder

Missy, it's really hard for clients to understand. They can't understand why the tax assessor says they should pay more taxes while their home prices are going down. It's confusing and sad. I read the Featured post about Countrywide and banks red-lining today. I was a little surprised to see Ann Arbor on the list as high risk.

here's one for the books, I am sharing a building with an appraiser and the stories are amazing. I local lender sent a questionnair before the appriasal order. The questionairre said, These clients would like a loan, if I do the loan the appriasal can not state "declining market" or they will get FHA loan with someone else. Hmm the house is $58,000 in an area of $150.000. What's wrong with that picture. I'm putting the story on my blog.

I love your heart in your stories...

FEB

2008

Missy.... usual post or not, this needs to be talked about. besides, it allows the consumer to see another side of you, so I truly believe that you need more of these in between you other posts. Just my ,02. I call these my touchy feely posts.... and it does work when the consumer sees you as a professional, but also human and caring...

Missy,

I was doing a CMA for a potential client today and she said she was about to buy a condo many years ago but didn't feel quite right about it. A school teacher collegue of her hers said, if you don't love the home enough to still want to be in it when it loses money, don't buy it. She was able to pull out of the transaction and bought the single family home that she has now lived in for decades. Yes, it is very sad when our clients bought at the height of the market and have to sell for less than they paid. Hopefully, they loved their homes enough that it brought them enough joy so that they feel the same way as the school teacher.

If people are downsizing due to illness or a loss of a job and bought at the peak in 2005 then it is a very sad situation, but if they are selling and moving up then they are getting a bargain because even though they are losing on their sale they are saving on a more expensive purchase.

It's not what they are selling, it's what the spread is between what they are selling and what they are buying that makes the situation sad or not.

Missy, I understand why you feel this way. You really do put yourself in your client's shoe and if I werent a realtor, I would only hope and wish for one like you. Thanks for being real. I think that's all your clients can ask.

Gail (with Missy's permission): What an awesome comment. That just makes so much sense. "If you don't love the home enough to still want to be in it when it loses money, don't buy it." That was so very well put. I have learned something today... and I am pleased. Cool Beans !

FEB

2008

Missy, First let me mention that I agree with Karen Stones comment above about Gails comment!!! I am going to use that phrase!!1

Second, as many have noted, you do have a big heart and because of that, you will feel sad. The situation in many parts of the country actually are similar. I know here in my little state, many, many people are hurting, not just because they can't get the equity they were hoping for, but literally losing their homes. Last year I did a blog on Eviction. This year it is absolutely horrendous. Meeting these people does not get easier. All I can do is try to help as best that I can, which is all you can do, also. It's tough to find the positive in these situations and I think we have not seen the worst of it! Remember, it is not your fault! And just try to do the best you can for them. Now smile:)

FEB

2008

Makes me sad too, Missy. I wish I had a crystal ball. All we can do is think positive. At some point, and I think soon, this will turn around.

Leave a response…

Name:

Email:
(optional)

Comment:

What does the graphic say?