Communication can create conflict or bring people together. Today I will give you a tip to help you build bridges instead of walls when you interact with others.
Certain things we say create conflict and resistance. But if we become aware of them and know what to say instead, we can communicate more smoothly with others, creating greater agreement and far less hostility along the way.
For example, the word "but" can be a problem. Whenever you hear "but" in a sentence, you know that you should discount what came before it and pay attention to what comes after. If I were to say to you, "That's true, but..." you know what's coming next, right? I'm going to tell you why it's not true or why it's irrelevant. Or if I say, "That's an interesting idea, but..." you know that I'm about to tell you why it won't work.
Supposing that instead, I said, "What you say is true and here's something that's also true...Or if I say, "That's an interesting idea, and you could also look at it this way." Feels a lot better doesn't it?
By using the word "and" instead of "but," I am linking my ideas to yours instead of putting them in opposition to each other. The difference between "but" and "and" is a lot like the difference between boxing, which uses brute opposition to defeat an opponent, and Aikido, which joins with and redirects an opponent's energy in a way which is better for both of you.
You will be more persuasive and create less conflict and resistance if you avoid "but" and strive for agreement, instead.
Here's To Making This New Day A Happy Day
For by thy words thou shalt be justified, and by thy words thou shalt be condemned.
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