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Little White Lies

By
Real Estate Agent with Star State Homes Realty TX Lic# 0519122

What are these so called "White Lies"?

As a child my Mother taught me lying was wrong, that not telling the truth was/is a character flaw and a sign of low moral standard. As I got a bit older, I began to understand that some lies, while still lies, are not all bad. Protecting someone from getting their feelings hurt or "lying by omission" for the same purpose is in most cases viewed as being caring and sensitive to others. Since beginning my career I see that line between these two blurred more an more. Protecting your clients best interest is always number one; knowing what to say and what NOT to say or divulge is primary and at the for front of this.

Real Estate ethics tells us that we are required to be honest and fair to all parties. I understand that this in general refers to "pertinent facts" and can be a "gray area" to some in regards to negotiations.

Do cooperating agents (listing) not know or care that making statements or just plain lying during negotiations regarding things that will show up or become clear on the settlement statement or HUD1, is just bad business? Making comments like, "my poor client is going to bring money to the table", or "I am giving up some of my commissions to make this deal work"; are a sad reflection of ones poor negotiation skills and/or ones lack of ability to present to their client their value proposition.

Do these "Agents/Realtors" not understand that using these kinds of cheep tactics are in fact hurting them and their clients? Who will trust or want to do business with them again? Once agents/realtors talk to one another (and we do) one of two things begin to happen. 1) Other agents will be reluctant to do a transaction with them, thereby reducing the sellers buyer pool, or 2) Will likely not believe a thing the agent says and again hurts the sellers ability to get offers negotiated.

One thing that will almost always trump all else is ones integrity and honesty. There are to many ways to negotiate a deal which is in your clients best interest without lying. Lying cheapens ones character and the industry as a whole. 

Karen Anne Stone
New Home Hunters of Fort Worth and Tarrant County - Fort Worth, TX
Fort Worth Real Estate

Eric:  I do not think that an agent saying that their seller will have to bring cash to the table to close, or that they are giving up part of their commission to make the sale work... I don't think there is anything wrong with that.  In this case, with things like these two things... I think the "wrongness" is in the eyes of the beholder... and that would be you.

Just remember that in real estate, as in life in general, there are many different personality types... and not all of them see things like you do.  How boring things would be if we were all alike.

Just my thoughts on things.  Have a great weekend.

** Strangely enough, I just looked over to the right, and see that we both started with Active Rain in August of 2007.  Funny how that works.  I hope it has been worthwhile for you.

May 01, 2013 03:41 PM
Dan Tabit
Keller Williams Bellevue - Sammamish, WA

Eric,

These tactics only work once. After that you know not to take what this agent says seriously.  A reputation gets established and I share my experiences with other agents I work with and care about.  It's a shame a simple thing like honesty can't be maintained.

May 01, 2013 04:40 PM
Amanda Christiansen
Christiansen Group Realty (260)704-0843 - Fort Wayne, IN
Christiansen Group Realty

I think an agent that uses these tactics is a poor negotiator.  If it does work at all, it will only work once.  Excellent post and congrats on the feature.  

May 01, 2013 06:20 PM
Karen Anne Stone
New Home Hunters of Fort Worth and Tarrant County - Fort Worth, TX
Fort Worth Real Estate

Eric and Dan:  I am sorry, but I guess I missed the point Eric was trying to make.  I was taking BOTH of those statements by the other Realtor... as far as a seller having to bring cash to closing, or the Realtor having to give up part of their commission to make a deal "work..." as being true.  I know I have been in closings or transactions when each of them has been true.

I, myself have had sellers have to do that, and I, myself have had to contribute to make a deal work.  It is rare, but it happens.  I am sorry you are so jaded that you have to assume that all you are hearing is lies.

Sure... if an agent says stuff like that at every closing, they look like a schemer.  I guess that was just the part of me that is more inclined to take someone at their word.  In fact... I still feel that way.  Until it can be proven otherwise.

May 01, 2013 06:24 PM
John F Muscarella
RIVER FARM PROPERTIES, LLC - Venice, FL
Broker/Owner, Venice, FL, Florida's Suncoast

In reading thru this it appears it is how one divulges information.  If it is a fact and true and comes from being ethical and honest, then perhaps it will help a deal.  Realtors should help one another and do the right thing for thier clients. 

May 01, 2013 07:20 PM
Edward Gilmartin
CRE - Boston, MA

White lies are lies that protect other people....in real estate a lie is a lie.

May 01, 2013 08:33 PM
Frank Laisch
Orlando, FL
"The Insurance Guy"

I am with Edward, when it comes to an E&O claim, lawyers and juries frown upon white lies(or any lies)  and side with the consumer....

May 01, 2013 09:43 PM
Ed Silva, 203-206-0754
Mapleridge Realty, CT 203-206-0754 - Waterbury, CT
Central CT Real Estate Broker Serving all equally

I have a transaction working with two of those lies right now: The seller has to being money to the table and we have a small commission because they have to bring money to the table. I will certainly make a point of looking at the HUD at the closing table

May 01, 2013 10:40 PM
Eric LaMay
Star State Homes Realty - Keller, TX
Star State Homes Realty

Thank you everyone for taking the time to comment on blog. Karen you are correct, all agents are not the same and yes I think you did miss my point.

 

I am not saying that telling the other side that one’s client is bringing money to the table or giving up part of your commission is a bad thing or even wrong. What I am saying is that "lying" about that when it is clearly not the case and can be clearly seen on the HUD1 is bad business and cheap.

 

There are too many honest ways to negotiate without using the "sympathy card". We are all adults (or should be) and should understand this is a Real Estate transaction period. No one really cares if the seller has to bring money to the table and no one for sure cares if we Realtors have to give up some or all of our commissions. The fact is; giving up your commission is a "choice" you make and the seller does not have to accept the deal if in fact they are bring money to the table, or whatever. After all; we are not asking for money for MDA like Jerry Lewis so we really don't need to bring out the wheel chairs.......

 

Again, stooping to lying to get a deal done in my opinion is a "cheap shot" and like several others here have said, you will only get away with doing it once and unless the Realtors in your area never talk; you will get a bad reputation. After all, we can all agree that we live and die by our reputation.

 

May 02, 2013 12:55 AM
Fernando Herboso - Associate Broker MD, & VA
Maxus Realty Group of Samson Properties - Clarksburg, MD
301-246-0001 Serving Maryland, DC and Northern VA

Definitely we do not need any help that tarnish the reputation for all agents out there. .

people are always judging our occupation based on the behavior of  some bad apples out there. 

May 02, 2013 01:06 AM
Richie Alan Naggar
people first...then business Ran Right Realty - Riverside, CA
agent & author

Credibility rules the day...When you shoot straight, your confidence levels remain high...Honesty and doing right wins out every time

May 02, 2013 01:21 AM
Marc McMaster
RE/MAX Centre Realty - State College, PA
Putting my clients before myself

Lying doesn't get you far in this business.  Just yesterday I had an agent flat out lie to me in a phone conversation that I called her out on since I had kept the emails that proved she was lying.

May 02, 2013 03:01 AM
Frank Harper
Idaho Family Real Estate - Boise, ID
Broker/Owner, Realtor, GRI, SFR.

Lying just makes us all look bad!

May 02, 2013 04:16 AM
Carla Muss-Jacobs, RETIRED
RETIRED / State License is Inactive - Portland, OR

My experience with agents who bend things are often bending because they didn't catch and make the call in the beginning.  It's a CYA fumble bluff for them, sometimes it snowballs.

May 02, 2013 04:33 AM
Charles Stallions
Charles Stallions Real Estate Services - Pensacola, FL
850-476-4494 - Pensacola, Pace or Gulf Breeze, Fl.

I find that most do not the know the difference between a lie and the truth nor do they care.

May 03, 2013 12:40 PM