My wife Mary Jo and I were having lunch Sunday with my mom who is 86 and at the retirement home. Mary Jo mentioned to mom that her sister-in-law Janet's dad Joe VonHandorf died the other day. Mom quickly remarked "well, Aunt Lillie died also". That is the first we had heard about that. So as soon as we got back home Mary Jo looked it up and there it was Lillian Dawes age 89 died on Feb 28, 2008.
Our dilemma was that both funerals were on the same day. In fact both visitations were at the same time, earlier this evening Monday 5:00 - 8:00pm. We decided after discussing the various ways to attend that we would both go to Aunt Lillie's visitation in Lawranceburg, Indiana tonight and Joe VonHandorfs funeral in Covington, Kentucky tomorrow morning.
As we entered the funeral home we met Lillie's son-in-law Sam. He explained how Vivian, Lillie's daughter found Lillie at peace in her chair at home just shortly after she died. Lillie was a strong woman up to the end. She insisted on living alone and taking care of herself. Vivian was at peace with her mothers death as painful as it was.
Mary Jo and I had an opportunity to visit with relatives we hadn't seen in a long time. My only living uncle on my moms side Russell was there. I hadn't seen him for 5 -6 months. There were cousins and second cousins I hadn't seen for 10 - 15 years and some, never. Of course we didn't have much to talk about...we hardly knew each other.
Why is it we only see our relatives at FUNERALS? Do we live such busy lives with our business, children, committees, church, and such...we don't have time for our own blood relatives? That is a real shame.
As Mary Jo and I were leaving we noticed one of my closest cousins when growing up, Bob drive in. We waited for him and his wife to meet us there at the entrance. We chatted for a few minutes and along came his older brother Tom. I hadn't seen Tom for 7-8 years. In fact I hardly recognised him. His daughter asked me if I had been on the family website. Well, no I haven't and I feel very guilty about that and for not staying in touch better.
I am reading a great book. Robert Maurer, Ph.D's "One Small Step Can Change Your Life". I highly recommend reading this book. He explains The Kaizen Way concept. If you have any situation that needs to be handled, loosing weight, stop smoking, a messy desk or relatives that you haven't stayed in touch with. The Kaizen Way explains how small steps become giant leaps by not trying to tackle something head on and never getting around to it because it is so overwhelming.
So I have decided that tomorrow I am going to look up the family website and log-on and begin staying in touch. If I just call one relative a week...that would be better than not talking to them for years and years, maybe at funerals. It is good for the soul and who knows maybe someday they may need my help.
A friend of mine says deaths come in threes. We only know of these two. I hope he is wrong.
God bless you all and bless all your relatives. Call on one this week and say Hi.
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