I had an assistant who used to chew on toothpicks.  We were sitting at a closing table and he appeared to be totally bored, and justifiably so.  We had been sitting for 30 minutes waiting on the closing agent to finish assembling the package only to find out the HUD-1 was incorrect.  I was chatting with my clients and the closing agent when I was horrified to see that my assistant had disassembled one of the flowers from the centerpiece of the closing table, and had it sitting on his notepad in front of him.  I looked around and quickly gathered up the pieces and tossed them into the arrangement.  A few second later I hear him giggling.  I had about had it when my phone showed a new text message,

"Why did you throw my toothpick into that flower arrangement?" 

At this point, I could hardly contain myself.  It dawned on me that the gnarled toothpick looked like the things sprouting out of that arrangement.  First, I was "grossed out" that I had actually handled something he had been chewing on for the past fifteen minutes.  Then I was amused that I was judging him for tearing apart there floral arrangement, and I had just soiled it by using it as a garbage can.  Afterwards, we had a good laugh, and I told him he is not allowed to chew toothpicks around me.