Don't You Hate It When Part Four- Realtor Edition
Some very funny (and all to true) episodes from the life of a Realtor, thanks to Noah Seidenberg. Do you have any additions that you can give him?
Here we go again. I am going to start this out with a story. I got a buyer once who wanted to buy a 3 bedroom condo and from a search gave me a nice list. One of the properties was one of those FSBOs where you pay $500 and it is put in the MLS and the home owner pretends they are a Realtor, you call them directly. I called the number and a woman answered and said sure you can show my condo. Here are the instructions. She said she was out of town in Michigan and that she has two huge dogs in the condo. The dogs do not go out and they do their thing on pads. I am to go to the condo early and take the pads out and dump the doo off them so the place looks better and does not smell. I actually said to the woman "are you out of your mind" "I might get bit and I am not doing the doo with Rover and Spot".
True story and I refused to show it, it went expired a few months later, my client laughed and did not care.
Don't you hate it when a buyer asks you, is this neighborhood safe, ah come on you can tell me.
When the old push button lockbox is rusted shut and a client really wants to see the home
You schedule a whole day of a zillion showings and the buyer client says at the last minute "oh let's start two hours later".
Smokey and smelly houses.
Dogs that you think are gonna bite you.
You have an open house and no one comes
You feel like firing a buyer because they are looking forever but think the minute you do they are going to buy with another agent so you go on and on
You are showing a house, the client walks outside, you follow and realize you are locked out of the house
You show many properties to a "buyer" and they go to an open house on their own, buy the place and call you to congratulate them
You get a listing presentation appointment with a seller who has zero intention of using you, they just want to double check on their "buddy" who is a Realtor in a different area and is not even known in the part of town you work but they get the listing
Required meeting at your office where all they do is have sales people talking about selling you products you are interested in at all, I call it the Spam meeting
Buyers calling or emailing saying can you show me this home right now, they think you have nothing to do and schedule on the fly
You try to schedule a showing and the MLS says call listing agent and they do not get back to you
You get a listing appointment with a person that has 29 cats, and does not EVER clean the litter box or even have any
You get a listing appointment from a call, the person sounds so intelligent and friendly on the phone and when you get to the house it has so many stacks of old news papers and junk you think of calling "Hoarders".
You meet a buyer who wants to work with you and you go home thinking they are so nice. The minute the subject of money comes up when they find a home they change from Dr. Jekyll to Mr (or Mrs) Hyde
If you like this then give me some ones you hate and we can put them in part two.
Noah SeidenbergColdwell Banker Evanstonnoah.seidenberg@cbexchange.com
Toll Free (800) 858-7917Office (847) 316-8529Fax (781) 609-0898Real Estate Specialist Chicago-land and SuburbsLicensed Illinois real estate broker
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