Hi Kathy,

I know what you mean. A couple of months ago we had a huge family garage sale, all proceeds were to go to CHOC, Children's Hospital of Orange Co. 100% of what we made that day was donated. One family decided to help themselves to things they did not pay for. Fortunately we had enough help that someone noticed as they were leaving without paying, we made them bring things back.

I learned that while trying to do good, some will still take advantage of a situation, yet others made up for them with more donations. It was a great day.

Kathy~Oh how very true this statement is. I seem to do this often where I try to be all things to all people at all times and then, well, you get it.

Lynda-That's a wonderful thing to have the sale and donate 100% to the Childrens Hospital......and I guess in my mind it makes it even worse when someone tries to take advantage (not pay).  That was a wonderful thing you did, and yes, I have seen others compensate like that as well.

Julie-Once the children are grown...:)  In your case Julie, I am not surprised......I still smile at  some of the comments you've made here.....you always try to be the peacemaker, and boy that can be tiresome :)  I hope all is well with you......and it's OK if people get consequences for their behavior...that's life :) :)

Kathy...as we have been told, there are givers and there are takers.

Take care,

Kathleen

I think this is why it is so important to pick a niche and not try to be everything to everyone. It is a very hard habit to break as a newbie, but once you do, you can actually do a better job and make more money.

Todd

So true, Kathy.This is one reason I have grown a team, one person at a time. You can't do it all, or at least  I couldn't. It's Wed now but the truth remains.

What nerve:)

Kathy I know people can be very creative.  You see the show with stupid criminals all the time.

Kathy- this is so true.  If people put their minds to good instead of taking advantage of people, the world would be a much better place! 

Oh, Kathy! This is oh, so true! You have to be true to yourself and know your limitations. But...thieving at a garage sale...how cheap can you get! 

Kathy,

I'm with you.

I gave up believing I was an invincible super-woman long ago....I know my limitations and boundaries and I do everything within my power to maintain them; otherwise I end up in a poor state of healthy and not much good to anyone, least of all myself.

I really enjoyed your analogy... 

Jo 

I always know when I am getting off track.  I lose stuff, cant remember who I just dialed the phone to call?  The list goes on.  That is when I know that I have to step back and get a grip!

When I get to the point where I just want to scream "I can't do EVERYTHING" then I know it's time to take a step back and look at my priorities again.  Am I doing the most productive things with my time or am I letting someone else take OVER my time?  Knowing your limitations is important, but being able to set boundaries is critical.

When I get to this point I know it is time for me to go back to list making. I see the wonderful effects of writing out a to-do list but I always drift away from it and get overwhelmed. Then I have to take a breath, rethink my priorities and then start over again.

 Kathleen-  short and Sweet.....yes, there are givers and takers...in all areas of life.

Todd- Exactly.....and even in todays market, in some areas we have seen such a slowdown that any sale looks good, our niche or not.  But that could be more of a problem if you don't know what you're doing.

Missy- Funny, but I was actually thinking of the benefits of a team just the other day. One person at a time....or someone suffers.

Oh, and yes today is Wednesday....I posted that last night before the cut-off....so it would be a Tuesday Post :) :)

Neal- Well said my friend, well said :) :)  smiling at your comment.......

Nannette- And imagine if they used that creativity for something positive :)

Laura- So true.....you said it perfectly :)

Linda- People always amaze me......no matter what some of them get as far as a bargain.....they just want more.  Some people rationalize their own behavior that they need it, I have it, and so they just take it.  People that have a strong moral conviction would feel guilty about stealing, but so many many just rationalize the behavior.  As I told my daughter......they must have needed it more than me :)

And as to our own limitations......I learned mine real good when I was in the Army, and had them re-enforced when I was in the Peace Corps :)

 Jo- Knowing our limitations, and accepting them are 2 different things. It's hard for so many people not to be able to do everything, or to say to our family, friends, or clients......"I'm sorry I don't know how to do that."  For some reason we're looked upon as less than if we can't do everything......but I think that is a perception problem, and a communication one.  If we were to instead say "I don't know, let me find out"  Poof.......trust is built :)

Audrey-Were you watching me when I called Vannessa by mistake LOL :)  Just here laughing, don't mind me.....

Lisa- you said, " Knowing your limitations is important, but being able to set boundaries is critical. "  I think that one sentence is the essence of everything healthy. Thank you very much......

Misty- I love lists.......I love it better when I can actually check things OFF the list :)   I like the take a deep breath, re-think, and start again.  Kind of like a quarterly evaluation.....what is working, and what isn't.  It's amazing how so many of us know our limitations but we still push them, and then as you said have to come back and regroup.

Ah...the assertive agent (person) who is able to communicate with the "I will not tell you what you want to hear...but tell you facts"....and the fact is ....If I don't know...I'll ask.

Sally- Yep...that's the one ....:)  If we were to take a group poll here of the one person that consistently writes and practices healthy boundaries, and knowing their own limitations....I think you'd win Hands Down :) :)  

Okay -- Goodness knows it would not hurt for me go get thinner!  (lol) -- but what you are referring to is the wrong kind of thin!  I have specialized in working with buyers only.  I have not had to experience the paradigm shift to the consumer -- because I always was consumer oriented -- I can "sell" my expertise to my prospects -- working 24/7 -- now that is where I can get thinner!

Life is too short to perfect your weakness.... I always say!

Kathy!

...very well said-I have found the only thing in life that is good spread thin is peanut butter!

Steve

Joan- Funny....I need the other thin right now, but yes that isn't the one I'm talking about LOL :)  I was primarily a listing agent, for land.  So, I got hit twice as hard......people weren't buying land, and sellers didn't want to come back down on price.  I started going back to houses, and go figure....now the land has picked up :) :)  spreading myself too thin with a lot of things.

Joeann-  That's a philosophy for a long life :)

Steven- Cute.....I like that :)

Kathy - Good advice for all sides of the Industry.  As far as writing things down on a piece of paper and losing that piece of paper, heck, I could sure use a secretary:-)

Well, that was a very nice compliment Kathy. Thanks....  <scuffed a foot here>  :)

Hi Kathy,
It is easy to do-- over extend ourselves, our time and energy.  I tend to think I can do it all and do a lot of the time but there is a downside to this as you pointed out.  As for your garage sale, I don't think one person can ever handle a garage sale.  Every one I have ever had, seems everybody arrives at once!

Kathy, one of my favorite sayings is "you snooze you lose".  I have been caught snoozing but when it happens I try to learn by my mistake and pick up the pieces and go on.  You are right we can't do everything or be everything.  What we can do is the best job we know how.

My computer must be possessed...I know I came on here and commented on Jason, Sally, Cynthia, and Marchel......I know I did.....those crazy Monday Leprechauns must be messing with my computer........ok, so now I don't know what I said....except:

Jason-I remember commenting that my secretary used to hide all my tablets of paper.....we thought the tablet pc would solve these problems,,,,but it didn't :)

Sally-I commented about your comment reminding me about the movie Bambie....where Flower was standing looking embarrassed, and with that cute little smile :)

Cynthia- Sometimes I go way past my comfort zone, or just plain try to do too much....my Timex (as Bobby Carrol says) had about 30 hours on it instead of 24 :)

Marchel- Absolutely....all any of us can do is our best.  On the other hand we have to know that our best might not be good enough for some things, and that's OK.

Setting effective boundaries and being organized go hand and hand.  When I am realistically planning my days, I am better at accepting appropriate new tasks and declining the lesser ones.

That 'writing on a slip of paper' thing, is a trap I still fall into!

Kathy, some people are so greedy and so dishonest. My gosh!!! On the other hand, it sounds like you would handle that situation a bit differently next go around, huh? ;-)

Kathy:  Learning not to spread myself too thin is a talent and a gift I really need to find for myself.  I am glad for you that you learned how to cope with it.  Thanks so much for sharing.

Steven... it sounds to me you need to buy a better grade of peanut butter... LOL.  Lots of peanut butter, and lots of yummy grape jelly.  A meal fit for a Queen, or a King, if you prefer.

I've never had a garage sale but I know too well about spreading oneself too thin. I am learning though. I actually told my husband "NO" in two different languages (English and Spanish) that I would NOT even consider being president, or whatever he nominated me for, of the Homeowners Association. I am so proud that I realized I am at capacity because he really poured it on thick. I don't think he's ever given me so many compliments at once. hehehe!

Karen-Peanut Butter and Jelly....umm umm good....I like to toast the bread first.  Now as to spreading too thin our efforts.......yes, it takes some work, but we can do it :) :)

Laurie- I remember when I was in my early 20's my mother would get so irritated because I would write on anything and everything.....then of course lose it :)

Teri- Absolutely :)

Toni-Hi there....OK, I'm waiting for April 1st :)  I am so glad to hear you said no, the posts I've read sound quite hectic already.......I loved your comment on your husbands compliments.....:)

Hey again MB. Looks like it won't be April 1st but April 4th now. Couldn't say no, dang it! I'm learning though. My mind was yelling "NOOO" but my head kept nodding "yes."

Kathy:  I think in a slow market when you are trying very hard to make something happen, I think it can be very easy to be trying so many directions at once, that nothing works.  Kind of like spreading yourself too thin on so many, and not spending enough good quality time on the few areas that are most likely to produce results.

Karen- I couldn't agree with you more.  As far as spending quality time on the areas that will produce results, part of the problem is knowing which areas these are.....:) :)