The number one thing that will drive me to succeed is to tell me that I can't do something! I remember, 20 years ago...I was 31 years old teetering....
on the brink of a disintegrating marriage with two toddlers, 14 month and 3 years old. I was in the midst of taking my Real Estate exam, when my husband and I separated. We had just moved into a new town - where I had no family and no friends...yet... There were challenges emotional and financial ort.....and certainly from a Real Estate perspective I had "no Circle of Influence" to give me a kick start in my Real Estate career.
It's really easy in that kind of a situation ‘to have a ‘victim mentality'....Circumstances were tough.....the odds in many ways probably were stacked against me.......It's amazing to me though, how those very things gave me the impetus, adrenalin, energy and focus.........to prove to myself, and to be honest, probably to prove to others....that "I can do it!"
I have to admit, I had no shortage of people saying to me, "I don't know how you're going to manage"; "you need at least 6 months of expenses in the bank before you can get into Real Estate", "it's a tough business and you're going to have to work crazy hours"; and "how are you going to do that with young children?"
I know most of those people cared about me. They wanted what was best for me.....but it is interesting how often human nature is such that people like to point out all the obstacles in our paths......as if the innocence of youth, or naivete might make us think we can do it....when really it's too hard? They want to protect us from the potential hurt and disappointment....Like I mean really...what's the alternative?
But being a success, whether it be in your career, your relationships...or in your family...is a function of how well you deal the setbacks isn't it? When the going gets tough, that's when you need your motivation. You've got to keep feeding and building it.
I read motivational and self help books. I read about other successful people, to see what they did. I thought about how I could incorporate their ways of thinking into mine. It started for me as a sort of mantra. If they can do it......so can I! Then it became....if they can do it maybe I can do it better?!...... There are a lot of clever people out there-but I started thinking........how can I stand out? What can I do differently? How can I incorporate what's worked for others and yet put a twist on it and make it my own? Yes even in Real Estate! You don't have to be an entrepreneur with a unique product or service.....But you can be unique in the ‘type of service' you provide.
At any rate....passion, conviction, naivete, maybe.... stirred up with some desperation, spiced with conviction And the support of an incredible manager/broker and mentor - I did it! I found that for every goal I set for myself, I surpassed it! And...twenty years later I'm still selling Real Estate. My kids are now 16, 20 and 22. I'll let you figure out for yourself how old I am...!
So when someone tells me ‘I can't do something?' I say... "Bring it on!"'
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Liz, this is great, you have to have the right attitude and determination when faced with obstacles. Good for you!